“I don't think it's anything he's done before,” she answer. “At least not that I remember.” Ninkasi sighed and shrugged in frustration. “But he's never exactly licked salt off my neck or kissed me before either.” She backed away from Thor, just to give herself a bit of space, “or kicked my door in because my phone died so I couldn't answer his texts so he thought something was wrong...”
She moved over toward where her glass was set and took a moment to breathe and have a long, drink of the beer that had replaced the water in her glass. “And while the naked thing is awkward, it's not like I haven't seen a gazillion people naked.” It wasn't like she hadn't had sex with close to as many it seemed. “What makes it impossible on my side is... that... all of that what was suddenly right at face level...” Ninkasi gestured a circle in front of her face to give proper emphasis, “is pretty much what I go for. I don't mean the: hey, sure, why not, stuff. I mean active pursuit and an I am going to have to clear my schedule sort of thing.” She sighed and drank again. The glass emptied, but within a second had refilled.
“Except it's him. And he's not like everyone else I pick up in clubs and bars and at festivals and wherever else where sometimes the only goal is just to get naked and fuck as fast as possible. No. Kratos is... for lack of a less cliché word... a nice guy. In some ways, he kind of reminds me of your little brother. He blushes at some things, he's polite and respectful and kind of old fashioned.” She shrugged. “You'd probably never see him crudely grope someone in public because he thinks it's disrespectful. And... that's who he is. He's loyal to his family and his friends, if it doesn't go against his principles -which he sticks to, I can talk him into some seriously fun and stupid shit... and we have so much fun... that's great. He knows who he is, he sticks to that and he doesn't hide it and isn't ashamed of it.” She took another drink. “And I love that. Everyone should be proud of who they are. And I don't want him to change. But...”
There was a pause while she took in a deep breath and let it out on a long exhale. “I would have to.” At which point she flopped back down in her bean bag chair and sulked a bit.
“When obviously everything was kosher before the temptation of sex was brought into the picture and now I've had the visual -and nocturnal mental reminder, that my normal physical preference is right there... in order to not hurt him... in at least certain aspects...” Ninkasi sighed, frowned and swallowed hard to keep herself from resorting back to tears. But, against her wishes, a tear slid down her cheek anyway. “I would have to be the one to change.” Which was what she was referring to earlier when she mentioned being selfish.