InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Steven Yeun rules"

Dr Calleigh Reese Emerson, M.D. (dreviltwin) wrote in compass_network,
@ 2013-11-25 23:09:00

Entry tags:

!open, lisa cuddy

Filtered away from Ramses
Is there someone that I can talk to?

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	yesidid 2013-11-26 05:57 am UTC (link)
	Bruce isn't letting me work or anything so I'm around? Don't know if I got what you need though. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	dreviltwin 2013-11-26 05:58 am UTC (link)
	My children were born before I got put back in my own body and now that I'm back, I can't stop crying. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	yesidid 2013-11-26 06:07 am UTC (link)
	Did everything go okay? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	dreviltwin 2013-11-26 06:11 am UTC (link)
	Yeah, everything was fine with the birth. I wasn't there because it happened unexpectedly. I was in my husband's body at the time. I don't know what's going on. And to make matters worse, I look down at my children and I don't feel like they're really mine. Like I'm holding someone else's child. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

yesidid
2013-11-26 06:15 am UTC (link)

Well, if I remember health class right that's a whole lot of hormones to be thrown back in to, especially when you didn't have the last few months to get used to them...so just from the sciency side of things its not so hard to understand.

And they are your babies. Doesn't matter where they came from or who gave birth to them, you're there watching them, worrying about them, taking care of them, that's what really makes you a mother.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	dreviltwin 2013-11-26 06:22 am UTC (link)
	I just want to be happy about this, you know? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	yesidid 2013-11-26 06:27 am UTC (link)
	Yeah I...I think I can understand that. But happy is damn complicated and never quite black and white, sometimes you gotta look for happy in the grey. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	dreviltwin 2013-11-26 06:34 am UTC (link)
	That is so much easier said than done right now. (Reply to this) (Parent)

Calleigh

proud_miserable
2013-11-26 08:34 am UTC (link)

I think it's normal to not always feel that bond right away. Being a new parent is a major change in your life. It took me time before I felt that bond with my daughter and truly felt that she was my own. And I didn't even experience the hormonal and other physical changes that being in a post-pregnancy body brings. Just remember that it's normal and you're still a good mother. The bond will come; it did for me and Rachel. She makes me very happy now.

That being said, you may want to consider the possibility that you are experiencing postpartum depression and seeking treatment.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

	Lisa dreviltwin 2013-11-26 08:39 am UTC (link)
	I'm really not sure where to seek treatment, exactly. I'm not sure that we even have a psychiatrist on the island. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Calleigh proud_miserable 2013-11-26 08:50 am UTC (link)
	I think there is one, but I don't know much about him. There are some things you can do to 'treat' yourself. Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Ask for help with the babies when you need it. Keep talking to people about how you're feeling. And take some time for yourself. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lisa dreviltwin 2013-11-26 08:53 am UTC (link)
	I think the hardest part is figuring out how to talk to my very English, very proper, very stoic husband about all of this. Even after spending months in my body with all of these hormones, he's still kind of....unemotional now that he's back to being himself. At least it feels that way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Calleigh proud_miserable 2013-11-26 09:54 am UTC (link)
	He may have been raised to not show emotion. I think you should simply tell him how you feel and what you want from him. Chances are, he's seen you crying and wants to help. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lisa dreviltwin 2013-11-26 03:12 pm UTC (link)
	Everything just feels really overwhelming right now. I'm sure I'm just choosing not to see it. He really is a wonderful man. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Calleigh proud_miserable 2013-11-26 06:41 pm UTC (link)
	It is overwhelming. You're sleep deprived and you're learning how to be a new mom to two babies. He might think that he's helping by not being emotional. I think proper English men are famous for being stoic and having a stiff upper lip. I really think you should talk to him. (Reply to this) (Parent)