InsaneJournal

Email to Sarah


Sarah,

I've been sitting here all day trying to write you an apology letter. Trying to tell you how sorry I am for everything that's happened. But I can't lie to you. I can't sit here and say that I regret what happened with Richie because I don't. I had a wonderful evening with him that didn't turn out as I originally expected and just made it that much better. Richie and I are still just friends. That's all there is to it. Yes, we slept together. But that doesn't mean he's automatically in love with me. It just means that I'm old enough for him to see as more than just a friend. At least physically.

I do regret hurting you, though. Even though I know you won't believe me. I know that you think I did all of this on purpose and that hurts more than you can possibly know. It also hurts that you think I don't care about people getting hurt or Dad going missing. Of course I care. Why do you think I was in Manhattan in the first place? Or where do you think I've been most of the time? I was helping. And before you say worrying about all the bad stuff was more important than your love life, I would like to point out that all this bad stuff has made me realize how important my love life is. It's made me see that I need to get over Tim and move on because time is so short and anything could happen at any time.

It's not too late, you know? You could still tell him how you feel. You can write him a letter or send him an email explaining that you were hurt and why. If you really do love him the way you say you do, then it wouldn't be too much. He's a good guy, you know that. And have you ever considered the possibility that I might just be a surrogate for you? We are identical in looks, after all, and I'm just a bit older. So maybe that's why all of this is happening. Because I'm here and you're too young.

So talk to him, Tell him how you feel. Regardless of what you might think, it's not too late. Who knows what could happen? You're my sister and I love you and I hate that you got hurt. I am stepping aside. I have been very short with him when answering his texts. I won't answer his calls. I am officially out of his life. and now have no friends because of it

See this for the opportunity that it is. You don't have to talk to him face to face. You can email him so you can get it all out and not have to see him. But do it. Because tomorrow the next person to go missing could be you.


Love,
Rachel