InsaneJournal

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Elenwë of the Vanyar (vanya_elenwe) wrote in compass_network,
@ 2013-06-07 01:25:00

Entry tags:

!open

I hated being pregnant.

It's such a...dehumanizing thing. My daughter was the first grandchild born to my mother and father in law, and I couldn't help but feel that everyone saw me as little more than a womb for the baby. And I didn't like that. I'm a person, a woman in my own regard, with my own wishes and desires, a lot more than simply a baby maker.

I love my daughter, don't mistake that. She is very dear to me.

But I hated being pregnant, and I feel very sorry for all of you here who are stuck with that for the next year...nine months, however long it is that mortals carry their children.

(Post a new comment)

	nelyafinwe 2013-06-07 05:30 am UTC (link)
	Ai, you complain more than I do. Are you certain you are Vanyarin? Might you not be a blonde Noldo like my brother? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:31 am UTC (link)
	Hush. You try carrying a baby for a year and see how much you like it, wretch. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nelyafinwe 2013-06-07 05:33 am UTC (link)
	Tch, that is the province of women. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:34 am UTC (link)
	Perhaps there are some women who like it, even. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nelyafinwe 2013-06-07 05:36 am UTC (link)
	Aye, my mother bore seven sons. I cannot help but think she enjoyed it to gift him so many. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:38 am UTC (link)
	I cannot imagine. Making the children is pleasant; bearing them is not. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nelyafinwe 2013-06-07 05:43 am UTC (link)
	I will trust your judgment, as I am ignorant to both those things. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:44 am UTC (link)
	As I thought I would be for the longest time. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:31 am UTC (link)
	But it is not a terrible thing for all women, Nyara. You cannot think so. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:33 am UTC (link)
	I suppose I am glad children are born, in general. But one is plenty enough for me. It is a messy and uncomfortable thing. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:35 am UTC (link)
	I.. I cannot imagine it, really. I remember but vague details before Itarillë was born. But I know it is very hard on the mother. They take so much from their mothers. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:37 am UTC (link)
	I am glad that we had her. But you are right, it takes so much out of you. Do you remember me after the birth? I was happy, but I was so tired. I had never been that tired in my life. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:41 am UTC (link)
	She took much of your strength, look at the spirit that burns inside her. She is Noldor and Vanyar to her core. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:43 am UTC (link)
	Yet she is a light in herself. She is a beautiful mixture of both of us. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:45 am UTC (link)
	I feel that we dreamed her up, Nyara, and together we made the vision of her come to life. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:46 am UTC (link)
	I think perhaps we did. Except in my dreams she had grey eyes and dark hair. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:50 am UTC (link)
	I knew she would have golden hair. I hoped for it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:52 am UTC (link)
	Aye, that is why you married me, I know it. For golden-haired children. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:54 am UTC (link)
	And for love of you! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:55 am UTC (link)
	Aye, I know it. I love you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:56 am UTC (link)
	I love you too. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	dreviltwin 2013-06-07 05:44 am UTC (link)
	I'm about 16 weeks in and I am not liking one minute of this. The only good thing about it is not having to deal with that time of the month. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:45 am UTC (link)
	I think that is worse for humans than it is for elves. I did not like a single thing about it. Well, other than getting that way. My husband is very talented. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:47 am UTC (link)
	Elenwë! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:48 am UTC (link)
	What? It is true. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:50 am UTC (link)
	Ulmo's grace, Nyara. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:53 am UTC (link)
	There is no shame in wanting you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:54 am UTC (link)
	I know that! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:56 am UTC (link)
	Would you like to go for a swim with me? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:57 am UTC (link)
	[...] Yes. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 05:58 am UTC (link)
	Just a swim. Nothing more. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-06-07 05:59 am UTC (link)
	I trust you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 06:05 am UTC (link)
	You should. I would never push you, Sara, not ever. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	dreviltwin 2013-06-07 06:06 am UTC (link)
	My problem is that I was under a love spell so the details of getting this way are a bit hazy. Though we have been intimate since we came to our senses and he was extremely talented in that area. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thewinterknight 2013-06-07 06:07 am UTC (link)
	Love potions are illegal for a reason. Who gave it to you? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	dreviltwin 2013-06-07 06:11 am UTC (link)
	The island. It was around Valentine's Day. Apparently cupid was on the loose. Made me fall madly in love with Ramses and when we came to our senses about a week later, we were married and a little less than a month after that I found out I was pregnant. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	brotherofdemons 2013-06-07 10:12 am UTC (link)
	Considering I was under the influence as well it certainly wasn't myself. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 06:08 am UTC (link)
	I agree with Mr. Dresden, that doesn't seem right. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	dreviltwin 2013-06-07 06:12 am UTC (link)
	I never even spoke to Ramses before the spell, though, and now even though I've been kind of mad at him lately, I can't imagine my life without him. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Elenwë \| Fingolfin nolofinwe 2013-06-07 06:05 am UTC (link)
	You were celebrated among us. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Elenwë \| Fingolfin vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 06:08 am UTC (link)
	Me? Or Itarillë? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Elenwë \| Fingolfin nolofinwe 2013-06-07 06:40 am UTC (link)
	Both of you, naturally. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Elenwë \| Fingolfin vanya_elenwe 2013-06-07 06:43 am UTC (link)
	Pfft. You have never liked me. (Reply to this) (Parent)