Nicky took one more drink of her coffee before setting the empty cup back down onto the table. She had to mull that question around in her mind for quite a bit before she could answer. Did she want to? No. Not at all. It was far too frightening to be swallowed up by the darkness. She'd had nightmares about that as a child. As an adult, it was almost a reality. Shadow-stepping was the happy medium she'd managed to plot for herself.
"I have to do it," she finally replied to Charlotte with a tone that sounded more like she was getting back to her normal self, quiet and calculating. "As soon as those recordings make their way up the chain, I'll be ordered to do it." Charlie probably didn't know about the first incident with Vasily. This was actually the second time she'd exposed herself as being more powerful than they'd initially assumed.
"Obedient little soldier," Nicky saluted lazily when she said this. It was true. Ever since she fell in line with the program, she'd been the perfect agent. She did as she was asked, when she was asked, and didn't question it. If an order came down for her to go back into testing, she'd openly defy it and put but back in her little twilight box until she followed orders. God, she hated that room.