About to argue that he wasn't lying, (but that was a lie, wasn't it?) Jack quickly snapped his mouth shut and clenched his jaw. He was glad they were far enough away from each other so that he didn't have the want to either walk away or pull him into his arms.
"You did nothing wrong, Ianto. It's all things that I did, not you. I don't fucking deserve you or any of this. Not after what I did and put you through." Jack shook his head and drew in a deep breath, holding the air in his lungs before he slowly released it. He didn't know what to say and wanted to get out of this conversation. However, the way Jack usually escaped uncomfortable conversations was to jump right to the sex -- which obviously couldn't happen now.
Jack shook his head, finally exhaling. "Again, Ianto, you did nothing. You deserve to be loved but by someone better than me. Someone who doesn't fuck things up as badly as I did. I'm not good at relationships and I end up screwing things. Which is what I did."
What he wasn't expecting, however, was the punch to the jaw. Jack stumbled backwards, cradling his bruised jaw in his hand. That he deserved. Hell, he deserved a lot more in his mind. "It's your choice, yes, but not after what I did. Christ, Ianto -- what I said about Lisa. Fucking Gwen -- and in the end pushing you into the arms of the Master, figuratively speaking. I was scared to death I wouldn't get you back -- knowing what he had done to me and now he had you. How easily it would be to get back at me through you."
Jack closed his eyes, thumb rubbing his still smarting jaw. "Good right hook," Jack muttered under his breath. "I just don't deserve you. Everything I did -- and it doesn't matter if I wasn't in my right mind and didn't know who you were at the time -- I just don't deserve you."
You deserve so much more. Jack, however, couldn't bring himself to say the rest of it.