InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Put your legs up"

Haymitch Abernathy (ineedadrink) wrote in colligo_threads,
@ 2012-06-18 00:01:00

Entry tags:

haymitch abernathy, maysilee donner

WHO: Haymitch Abernathy & Maysilee Donner
WHAT: Maysilee just arrived, Haymitch is... drunk, and really not any less confused than she is, but he promised to come get her anyway.
WHEN: June 17th, early afternoon
WHERE: Outside of Colligo's library
RATING: Likely PG
STATUS: In Progress

Haymitch Abernathy had finally lost it. That was the only explanation for what was happening right now, and certainly the only explanation for why he seemed to believe it. Truth be told, Haymitch wasn't the sanest of people on his best days. He'd accepted that. He was never going to be the well-adjusted guy who had some really shitty experiences, but ultimately went on to raise a family and be some semblance of happy and functional. That wasn't him, and it never had been. No, Haymitch was that guy who discovered very early on that the path of least resistance was slicked with alcohol, and had been travelling down it at full speed ever since. He was the kind of broken that had given up on the idea of being fixed, and opted instead for basic functionality. Somewhere in there, he'd stayed sober enough long enough to help start a revolution, manipulate some people people into doing his bidding, trick the Capitol and save some lives. But once that was over, he'd gone back to doing and being very much the same as he'd been before.

He knew the person he'd became would have probably been a huge disappointment to everyone who ever really gave a shit about him before, but they were all dead, so what's it to 'em? It was easier, being around people who knew him as he was now. People who know him as a good-time fuck-up and liked him just fine that way, who knew what he'd been through and could begin to understand it. No one who had any expectations for him, nobody he could disappoint. Or there hadn't been, anyway. Until he got zapped to Moonbase 15 and people from his past started showing up.

At first, he'd felt a sort of frightened, hesitant excitement. Followed by Well, Fuck, at the realization that he'd spent the considerable majority of his hours on this planet in a bar. On some level, he wished she'd picked some other time to show up - some time when he knew he'd be lucid enough to not make an ass of himself. But the odds of that happening were pretty slim. So he was going to get to go meet up with the girl he hadn't seen since he was 16-years-old, the girl who'd pretty much died in his arms, 25 years older than she remembered and soaked in alcohol. But, to be fair, he wasn't sure he would have been able to face this situation any other way, so maybe it was just life's way of giving him a head start.

Still. Good thing none of her weapons were fire-based, or he'd light up like a fucking torch.

He did have the good sense to splash his face with cold water and down half a bowl of bar peanuts, straightening up his shirt and vest until he looked almost presentable before he headed out the door. He had his doubts about the usefulness of that can of air freshener for covering up the smell of booze, but it seemed like a good idea at the time, and there was no turning back now. He was walking straight, more or less. This was... this was going to be fine. Well, no, it was going to be horrible, and he was as close to terrified as drunk him ever was, but he was going to be fine. Sort of.

He made good time getting to the library, catching his breath as he strode slowly up to the steps. He caught a glimpse of a slim figure hiding out behind one of the columns, and made his way towards it, trying not to make any sudden movements. Sure, she knew he was coming, but he knew what the games did to people, and startling someone with an aptitude for poison dart-blowing would have been staggeringly shortsighted.

"Maysilee?" He called, his gruff voice low and hesitant as he walked toward her, his palms open to assure her that he wasn't carrying a weapon. (Sure, he had one stashed where he could easily get to it, but that was just a sane and adaptive response to being Haymitch Abernathy.) "It's me. It's... uh, it's Haymitch. You all right? You're not... hurt or anything?"

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

ineedadrink
2012-07-03 11:12 pm UTC (link)

When Maysilee lunged toward him, there was a fraction of a second in which Haymitch's tribute reflexes kicked in, one hand reaching for the knife holstered to his wrist, but the moment of panic quickly gave way to a pleasant sort of confusion. Either Haymitch was a lot drunker than he'd originally thought, or she was -- hugging him. No, that was definitely what was happening. Maysilee's arms were holding him close in the most adorable vice-grip ever, like she really wasn't planning on letting go.

He smiled - he couldn't really help himself - and returned the gesture, wrapping his arms around her tiny frame. She was even thinner than he remembered. She was stronger than she looked, certainly, but that wasn't saying much, given how tiny and frail she seemed, especially compared to Haymitch, who'd spent his twenty years being extremely well-fed for a guy from twelve.

"I'm really glad you're here, too," He replied, feeling a pang of guilt hit him at the declaration. It was true, but after the way they'd parted, he couldn't help but feel responsible for what had happened afterwards. Would she still have been happy to see him if she knew he'd been too late to save her?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

quelled
2012-07-05 05:28 am UTC (link)

He was very real and very solid and Maysilee just wanted to hold on and never let go. For the first time since she'd arrived in this strange place, she felt safe and secure. Haymitch had always had a way in the arena of making her feel more at ease, and that was no less true here. So as much as she knew that she really ought to let go before she made the situation uncomfortable, she wasn't sure she could. There was this overwhelming, illogical fear that if she let go of him that he would disappear into the ether and she would be left alone. So she held on all the tighter to him before she finally managed to convince her arms to let go.

"I'm sorry," she said. "I just...this is so confusing and I felt so alone until you came. I know we're not in the Arena any more, but I didn't feel safe...not until you showed up." She was quiet for a moment, hoping Haymitch wouldn't judge her too harshly for her silliness. As familiar as he was, she wasn't sure what to think of this older version of Haymitch. She only hoped there was still some part of that boy she'd worked with in the Arena inside him, that the Capitol hadn't broken him too badly.

"So," she said after a long moment's silence, "you won." It was obvious, but still something she thought worth saying. "I'm glad it was you...and not that horrible girl from District One. She honestly frightened me." She paused. Part of her wanted to ask how she had died, but she didn't want to throw such a heavy question at him so soon after she arrived. From the looks of things, it had been far longer for him than it had been for her.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

ineedadrink
2012-07-08 10:26 pm UTC (link)

When she finally let go, Haymitch took a step back, letting his arms fall awkwardly to his side. They felt rather cold with the sudden absence of Maysilee's body heat. It was weird how that could happen. She'd only been there for a couple of seconds, she was standing right in front of him, and it was like he already missed her. Maybe it was how they'd parted ways the last time they were together - maybe it was just some latent fear that letting her go would mean saying goodbye all over again. It was dumb - she was just as stuck here as he was, and it wasn't like losing contact was going to send her back. But you can't blame him for thinking it might.

"Don't be sorry," Haymitch told her, shaking his head and averting his eyes to the floor. "It's... I understand. Shoulda' seen me right after I got out of the arena. I was a mess. Everyone is, when they get out. I'd be more worried if you were fine." It was true. Nobody really made it out of the arena in one piece. Even the careers who'd spent their whole lives training up for this, ready to kill whoever they had to, weren't really ready for what was asked of them when they entered the games. Nobody was. How could they be?

"Looks like it," He said, giving her a weak half-smile that looked more like a grimace than anything. "It-- it was that thing I tried to show you. The end of the arena. She threw an axe at me, and it bounced back and hit her right... well, it hit her. And... I got out. Only person from twelve until... well, until pretty recently." He almost told her about Katniss and Peeta, but he stopped himself short. He didn't want her to know that there had been two victors once - that there might have been a way for both of them to get out alive. That it might have been both of them if things had been different.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

quelled
2012-07-09 12:19 am UTC (link)

Maysilee wished that she could just cling to Haymitch and feel safe. Even this small distance left her feeling anxious and uncomfortable. She didn't want to be alone here, and he was the only thing that felt even a little bit familiar. Still, she couldn't go clinging to him like a child. He would hardly appreciate that and she didn't want him to think she was weak. Still, he seemed to at least understand where she was coming from. That made her feel a little better at least. She knew she would need time to remember how to be a normal person again, if she ever could, but she was sure that she would manage with Haymitch's help.

"I'm sure you were better than you thought you were," she said softly. "You've always been so strong, Haymitch." She'd seen him around, even before the Games, and she'd always respected him. He had seemed hardworking and driven. Finally getting to know him in the Games, she'd known she made a good choice in allying with him. That's why she'd left. So she wouldn't have to kill him. She'd hoped one of them would die before it came to that, and she'd almost hoped it would be her.

"So there was a...force field?" she asked. "Like the one in the Capitol?" She had noticed that, on the roof of the place where they had stayed. She listened to him talk and smiled. "I'm sure you were a good mentor," she said softly. She was quiet for a moment. "Haymitch...my sister....was she all right, after? She was always so...I worried about her, about what would happen if I died in the Games."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

ineedadrink
2012-07-09 05:03 am UTC (link)

"Never would have made it that far if it hadn't been for you, y'know." It was true. There really wouldn't be any point denying that: she'd successfully saved his life in the arena, but when it came to hers, he'd fucked it all up. Guess he didn't learn his lesson either, huh? "But yeah, just like that one. 'Course, the Capitol didn't like it too much that I found a way to cheat the system."

Her sister. Of course Maysilee wanted to know more about what had happened to the family she left behind. Hers had survived the reaping. They had been good to Haymitch, too, on the rare occasions that he could stand to look at them. They looked so damn much like Mays that it just... He didn't know. For a split second, he thought he felt a surge of something like emotion tighten in his throat and sting just behind his eyes. Fucking hell, he was drunker than he thought if his eyes were about to tear up. Those ducts had been dry for a while. He swallowed and smiled, giving Maysilee a short nod and looking at his shoes until the feeling passed.

"She ended up all right," he told her, deliberately avoiding the part about the revolution. There was no good reason why Maysilee would need to know how this story ended. "She got married to the mayor, had a kid, and they all turned out pretty well, considering. But she missed you. Everyone did. Kept your pin, too. Your mockingjay pin. The last girl from twelve was wearing it when she won."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

quelled
2012-07-09 04:01 pm UTC (link)

"You would have found a way," Maysilee insisted, looking up at Haymitch. "Even if I hadn't swooped in to rescue you, you wouldn't have found a way to save yourself. You're smart, Haymitch. And you're brave. You would have won with or without me." She frowned. "They don't like anything that defies their control," she said softly, thinking of the Avoxes and so many other things. "They punished you, didn't they?" She knew they had, even without an answer. Because that was the Capitol.

She smiled ever so slightly when Haymitch told her that her family was safe and happy. That was all she had ever wanted. She'd just wanted her family to be okay. Especially Marietta. They were twins, closer than other sisters, and she couldn't imagine how losing her must have hurt Mari. She knew that if it had been the other way around, if Mari had died and she'd been left behind, it would have killed her. She was glad her sister had managed to find some happiness in her life. She was sad at the thought of the niece or nephew she'd never had a chance to meet, but mostly she was just glad that Mari had a good life.

"Good," she said softly. "I'm glad. You looked after them, didn't you?" Because of course Haymitch had looked after her family, just like they had looked after each other in the Arena. He would have done that for her. She smiled at the thought of her pin being passed on, bringing her hand up to touch the item in question, where it was pinned to her outfit. "I'm happy someone found use for it. The girl who won...what was her name?"

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

ineedadrink
2012-07-09 06:54 pm UTC (link)

"Maybe," Haymitch agreed, though he sounded a bit tepid about the idea. While he was obviously competent and clever enough to make it to the end, the arena is a tricky place. One false move can easily get you killed, clever or no. Look at the girl from the 74th games who outfoxed the competition only to accidentally poison herself at breakfast. If being clever was all it took, District 3 would have a lot more victors. "But it would have been a lot harder without you around."

"Wouldn't be the Capitol if they didn't," he replied darkly, kind of wishing he had a drink in his hand right now. It certainly would have made this leg of the conversation a little more bearable. "They couldn't kill me without making a bunch of trouble for themselves, but the rest of the Abernathys were fair game." He shrugged his shoulders, an abrupt and jerky motion that did less to convey any sort of casualness and more to suggest that he really didn't think he could talk about it. Being orphaned as a teenager because of something you did wasn't the sort of thing anyone really got over. Sure, kids always blame themselves when shitty things happen to the people they love, but this was demonstrably his fault. Could you blame him for being a fucked up adult?

There was that guilty feeling again. He had tried to watch out for her family, but it was hard to be around them without, you know, hating himself more than usual. They didn't seem to blame him as much as he blamed himself, but you could still see that look of "why wasn't it you" in their eyes whenever he came around. And for so long, they'd done well on their own. He'd given them food for a while, but they were wealthy, and they already had more than everyone else. They didn't really need much help until the end. When he could have helped them find shelter, and he didn't. Again. He should have known better than to think that their status might have saved them.

He didn't want to lie to her, but he also couldn't tell her the truth, so after a moment of consideration, he nodded his head and stated simply, "As much as I could."

His eyes turned to her pin, and his lips twitched upwards in a sort of bitter fondness. "Katniss," he said, his fingers itching to trace the circle of that pin for some inexplicable reason. "Her names was Katniss. She was the victor of the last Hunger Games before the Capitol fell."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

quelled
2012-07-09 08:13 pm UTC (link)

"You would have," Maysilee insisted. She just knew that Haymitch was meant to win those Games. As much as she had wanted to win for her family, she never would have been able to bring herself to kill him. Anyone else, she would have managed. But not Haymitch. Not ever everything they'd been through. She probably would have refused and left him to kill her or tried to find some way to spare both of them. Could they even have done that? She wondered if maybe she should have fought harder to stay together, to find a way to bring them both home. "You would have managed just fine. I was the one who needed you. I don't think I would have made it as long as I did without you."

She wanted to hug him again when he talked about what the Capitol had done, but she just reached over and took hold of his hand. "It wasn't your fault," she said softly, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. Somehow she didn't think anyone had ever bothered to tell him that, if they'd even known. She had no doubt the Capitol had made it seem like an accident. "It was never your fault, Haymitch. Whatever happened to me was just the Games. And your family...that was the Capitol. They push us down and push us down and they never stop. You did what you had to in order to survive. You couldn't have known they would hurt them. I know you blame yourself, but don't. They wouldn't blame you, so don't."

She sighed. She could only imagine how her family must have felt, how hard it must have been for Haymitch to face their grief and pain. The fact that he had tried was enough for her. "Thank you," she said, leaning up to kiss him on the cheek. "You tried, and that's more than anyone else would have done." She might have said more, asked about Katniss, but then his last words hit her and her eyes widened. "The Capitol fell?" she asked breathlessly. "It actually fell?"

(Reply to this) (Parent)

(Read comments) -