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Tweak says, "STAR WARS. STAR WARS. STAR..."

lucy saxon isn't as dumb as she seems to be (neverthatbright) wrote in colligo_threads,
@ 2010-11-05 23:39:00

Entry tags:

!closed, #complete, lucy saxon, the master

WHO: Lucy Saxon and the Master
WHAT: A surprisingly calm reunion.
WHEN: Not long after Lucy posted this.
WHERE: The steps of the Grand Library, to start.
RATING: PGish [language and references to darker themes]
STATUS: Complete!

The Master was alive.

Lucy had known there was always a chance he would be resurrected. She had known, as soon as she was settled in prison, she had to start making plans to stop that from happening. However no sooner had she received her sentence did she find herself in that strange little library with knights who seemed determined to keep her out. Clutching the device they'd given her in her hand, she stared once more at the conversation she was having over what she guessed was a public message board of some kind. Her stomach tightened at the words that stared back up at her, finger lightly dancing across the small picture that made identification all too easy.

The Master was alive.

She wasn't prepared for this. She was in an unfamiliar city that apparently wasn't even on Earth, she couldn't leave, and she wasn't at all prepared to face him again. Her heart thudded painfully in her chest as she quickly scrolled through the menu of her PDA. It had given her the number of a flat, as well as a map, and she was curious if there was anything else of use. Anything at all that might help her.

Coming up empty, the woman closed her eyes for a brief moment. Her jaw quivered, lips pressing softly together as she swallowed down the emotions rampaging through her. When her eyes reopened she was calm, almost detached. Rising to her feet, she gripped her PDA tightly with one hand and began descending the stairs. She knew she wouldn't make it all the way to her new flat. She knew he was already on his way because she knew him. What she didn't know, though, was when exactly their paths would cross or what would happen once they did.

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cantyouhearit
2010-11-08 11:03 am UTC (link)

"Koschei, listen to me. This is Ailla. She’s one of us--"

The younger version froze, his eyes moving to the woman until the world around him faded, his focus pinned squarely on her was he searched her mannerism and air, picking up quietly on the small hints of the woman that he had once known, "But... How?"

The woman ducked her head, a mix of shame and anxiety filtering over her, "I was told... not to tell you--"

"Those... meddlers!" The rage was sudden and volatile, turned inward, building, before his gaze flew up to the woman, taking a step forward, his eyes flaring with anger. "So that explains your attention, and loyalty. You were spying on me. Keeping tabs on me for them, In the hope of... what? Being given an immediate appointment in one of the Council's tribunals?"

"No! I’m trained to observe and report!"

The anger vanished suddenly, an odd sort of clarity falling over his features as he looked at her before a bitter sort of amusement grasped him, "Yes, I see that now. Oh, and it was clever. You had me completely convinced. This betrayal will make you go far!"

"I was willing to die to do what was right. I did lose a life--"

"Were you? Or was I willing to kill?"

"What's happened to you?"

The Doctor's sudden interjection, the fear and worry and sadness in those four words pulling his younger version's attention, the bitter amusement twisting in his gut until he was smiling with a heavy edge of sadness, "What’s happened?" He repeated, the words barely audible, in a range that only the Doctor, the one standing closest to him at the moment, could hear. "My people mistrust me; I kill one of my best friends who was sent to me by the other; and both betray me." There was a quiet pause as something flashed in his eyes and suddenly the sadness was gone, replaced by a maniac look of relief and inspiration in his eyes and the smile on his face. "I have found myself, Doctor, and I am the stronger for it."

Taking a sudden deep breath, the Master pulled back. She didn't need to see the rest of it. She didn't need to see the rest because she already knew the rest. She knew the spiral that came from there. She'd seen that first hand.

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neverthatbright
2010-11-08 12:16 pm UTC (link)

If Lucy had known the rest of what he was going to show her, she would have declined. To hell with risking angering or insulting him. There were some things a person should never have to experience when it came to the one they loved and that had definitely been one of those things. It was too terrible for her to really wrap her mind around, too awful for any reaction she might have to truly express how she was feeling. She wanted, more than anything she'd ever wanted before, to take it all away from him. Remove the memory, lock it up tightly in her own mind if necessary, but get it away from him. It had to be torture to live with such a betrayal, knowing you would never truly be able to right the injustice done to you. The mere thought of him having experienced it at all was enough to make her want to sick up. The understanding that he would never be free of the memory made it nearly unbearable.

The tears had returned by the time he'd finished and there was such emotional agony shining in her eyes as she stared up at him, now sitting back on her heels with one hand resting on one of his thighs and the other hand in her own lap, that it was very nearly tangible. She wanted to say something, anything, to make it better but she knew nothing would ever do that. Yet she also knew she couldn't just sit there, silently, forever. Her mouth opened, then closed, then finally opened again. Her voice was thick with emotion when she at long last spoke.

"Thank you, for sharing that with me," she said first and foremost. She knew it couldn't have been easy for him. In fact, she was still quite stunned that he'd actually done so, which really was not the point at the moment. Saving that thought to analyse at a later time, she continued out loud, choosing her words carefully.

"I know nothing I say will make it better or change it, but I am sorry, Harry. So very, terribly sorry." In a move that was a bit bold for her, she reached for one of his hands, needing that sort of contact as she summoned the courage to say what she felt needed to be said.

"I love you," she began. "It frightens me, sometimes, how fiercely I feel for you." Her voice began to tremble, fresh tears pooling in her eyes. "I'd do anything for you, without question or reservation, and I'd never-" She stopped, knowing she couldn't finish that statement without it being a blatant lie. She'd already betrayed by choosing herself over him, even if he was insistent that it had been the lesser of two evils when it was all said and done.

Sniffling quietly, she instead admitted, "I wish I was deserving of you. You're amazing beyond my ability to describe it, absolutely brilliant, and I'm just..." She sighed, releasing his hand and giving a faint shrug of her shoulders.

"A pretty face with family contacts."

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cantyouhearit
2010-11-10 01:46 am UTC (link)

It was at both times amusing and disappointing just how strongly she had internalized the opinions of those around her, how firmly she believed that that was all she was, all she could be. It had been handy when he'd picked her as well, given him the sort of leverage that he needed in order to keep her under his thumb, but now, as he looked down at her, he smiled tightly and shook his head. "Silly, silly girl," He scolded quietly. "There are plenty of pretty faces with family contacts in that big bad world of yours, more than enough to spare. Did you ever not stop to think that there had to be more to it than just that?" No, of course she hadn't. Because he'd made sure to back up everything she'd heard with his own opinions, make sure that she didn't think about it all too much.

"And yes, you would," The Master said with an amused glint in his eyes. "You would, without a second thought, if you decided that I needed it, and you had a clear opportunity. You would take that opportunity and run with it. And that, Lucy, is one of the reasons that I knew you were the perfect one," He said, leaning his head back down and touching his forehead to hers. Luckily, no images accompanied the touch this time.

"It was because you know that sometimes, sometimes, you need to do whatever is necessary to get things done."

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neverthatbright
2010-11-11 12:41 am UTC (link)

Had she ever really considered that she was more than what she'd been told she was? No, she hadn't. There had been a time when she'd hoped it was more than that, and more than enough times she'd deluded herself into thinking that maybe he'd come to see her as more than such, but she'd never really believed it.

To hear that there might have, in fact, been more than what she'd thought wasn't something Lucy knew how to take. She felt her breath catch in her throat, her heart skip a beat in her chest. Her eyes widened ever so slightly, pupils dilating the tiniest of bits. The touch of their foreheads made her tense ever so slightly but no more imagines came. She listened to his words instead, eyes fluttering and a whimpering sigh on her lips.

Lucy was silent for a long moment. Between everything she'd seen and what she was now being told, she wasn't certain what to say. She continued to kneel there, letting it all wash over her. Finally she could think of nothing to comment on, nothing to even ask, save for one thing that seemed so wholly inconsequential and yet still stuck out for her in her mind's eye.

"The name," she began, eyes reopening as she shifted in her position. She rested her hands on the armrest of the chair, chin propped up. Ready to hang onto his every word. "The one she called you." She didn't say it, wasn't sure what he'd do if she did. She was afraid of risking his good mood. As it was, her stomach jerked as she finally put her thoughts to question.

"That was your real name?"

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cantyouhearit
2010-11-11 01:10 am UTC (link)

His name was something that he hadn't thought about for the longest time. Not beyond the occasional fragment of a thought when around the Doctor, when nostalgia decided to overtake him and push him back to the days when both of them hadn't been beaten down by the realities of the universe and the directions that their lives had taken. But as Lucy asked the questions, obviously treading carefully in her phrasing and going to extended lengths not to utter the name without permission, the Master nodded, "Was," He echoed. "But that was lifetimes ago. So much that he feels like a separate person. In a way, he was. Diplomat. Professor. Politician," The Master finished with a snort. Oh, how things went full circle.

"Then I got bored," He said with a shrug. "Gallifrey, as beautiful and wonderful as it was, was so...dull. So stiff," He said, leaning back in the chair with a sigh, staring up at the ceiling. "Most of my friends had already stolen TARDISes and left. And I figured, why not? We'd always planned to leave eventually... Explore what the universe had to offer rather than allow ourselves to waste away like most of our people did," The Master said with a quiet laugh. "Only the bastard had to jump the gun and leave me behind."

Not that he was still bitter about that or anything. Really.

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neverthatbright
2010-11-11 01:23 am UTC (link)

It was, by far, the most he'd ever shared about himself in one go. So much so, in fact, that Lucy found herself a bit overwhelmed. Listening to him speak of Gallifrey, of a time before the war that he only spoke of in passing, the memories he only relived when the Doctor seemed to be in his life, she studied his face as he stared up at the ceiling. Her brow furrowed at his laugh, lips pulled downward into a thoughtful look that faded back to blankness by the time his gaze came back around to her.

"I'm sorry, Harry. So terribly sorry," she said, meaning every word. It wasn't right, that he'd been betrayed again and again. It wasn't fair that he had to live with the memories of that forever. Her heart ached for him as much as she dared let it. The fact was, though, she knew his good mood would be reaching an end soon enough. She'd been way too fortunate thus far and was scared to push it any further by asking yet more questions.

Instead she rose finally, fingers trailing up his arm and resting lightly on his shoulder as she walked around the chair. "Would you care for some tea?" she questioned, glancing toward the kitchen.

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cantyouhearit
2010-11-13 04:55 am UTC (link)

There really wasn't anything that could be said beyond what he had. There were words swirling in his find, echoes of betrayals fully remembered and those half forgotten in the fog of centuries. There were days where he'd sit and stretch for a memory, for a time before there was a constant thrumming in the back of his mind, before the drum beat had entered his existence and disrupted his whole understanding of who and what he was. But right now, as the drums in his head began to ebb away now that the torrent of memories had left, and the calm had started to return, he didn't strain for another location to take his mind off of everything.

He was content right where he was.

His head lulled to the side as her fingers trailed up his arm, turning just enough to place a fleeting kiss to the back of her hand before looking up at her with an amazingly serene look in his eyes, "Yes, please."

For anyone else, it was a situation that probably would have been highly unsettling.

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