InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "you know you love me"

Arthur - The Point Man (noimagination) wrote in colligo_threads,
@ 2010-08-09 03:24:00

Entry tags:

!@event, arthur, mal cobb

Who: Arthur and Mal.
What: Meeting someone he thought was dead.
When: After this
Where: The bus terminal and then the apartments.
Rating: TBD.
Status: Incomplete.

Mal was alive.

Somehow, and Arthur had no idea how it was even possible, she was alive. Two years spent thinking she was dead, and now she was back. Arthur wasn't sure what to think about that, torn between disbelief and happiness. No anger though. He could never be angry at Mal, no matter how much he had wanted to be when she had killed herself. There had been bone-deep grief, but no anger. Now, the grief and weariness faded somewhat. It was still there though, because as much as she was alive she wasn't quite Mal. She didn't have the memories or the experiences that had shaped the woman he had known.

The woman he'd loved, if he was honest. Mal was the sort of person you couldn't help but love, and Arthur had been helpless to resist her. He'd been seventeen the first time he met her, and she had been beautiful and brilliant even then. He hadn't stood a chance. Over the years, he became closer to Dom and their friendship became a central part of his life, but there was always Mal there in the background. An unspoken divide between them. He knew it was wrong, the way he felt about his best friend's girlfriend, later his fiance and even later his wife, the mother of his children. But he consoled himself with the fact that he hadn't been the only one feeling these things.

He and Mal had been together right up until that trip to Limbo. It broke off after that, and then Mal had died. Or seemed to. Arthur shook his head as he reached the bus depot. He had put on his waistcoat and his tie, concerned about Mal's impression of him. He wanted her to notice him. It was utterly pathetic and he knew it, and he didn't give a damn. He saw her, just a few feet away, and he froze on the spot. She was beautiful as ever. Exactly like he remembered. He wanted to be selfish, to not mention Dom and let her draw her own conclusions. But he couldn't do that.

"Mal," he said, walking up to her. Words failed him in a way they rarely did and he just stared at her, captivated. He wanted to touch her, brush his fingers over her skin and reassure himself that she was real. "It's really you."

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what_is_real
2010-08-09 09:08 am UTC (link)

Mal looked up from her PDA, shielding her eyes from the light of a street lamp behind Arthur with one hand. His face was in shadow, but she saw enough to clearly recognize him. For the first time in years she honestly recognized someone, and the feelings of security and safety and love that flooded through her in that moment were nearly overwhelming.

He'd said they were friends, and she believed him. But there was more to it than that. Mal could feel it, deep down. There was more to them than just being friends, and he had hidden it from her, likely in an effort to not keep the flood of information from overwhelming her. Had they been lovers? Had they been married?

"Hello, Arthur," she said, slipping her PDA into her pocket as she stood. She reached out a hand to him, smiling broadly, fondness tinging her words. "I... I recognize you. I can't place distinct memories of you, yet, it's more of a feeling thing... But I recognize you."

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noimagination
2010-08-13 02:30 am UTC (link)

His hand slipped into his pocket on instinct, pulling out the die. He knew she would understand, knew she had the same compulsion. He moved over to a counter and rolled it once. Twice. Three times before he was convinced He'd dreamed of her so many times, and it was hard to believe he was seeing her again in reality. But he was and it was almost too much to bear. Feelings he had locked away two years ago, too caught up in Dom's grief and Phillipa and James's need for security to process his own feelings, came to the surface in a rush and it was all he could do to stay on his feet.

"Mal..." he said, and his voice caught on the word. He stepped up to her, unable to resist the urge to pull her into his arms and just hold her. He knew it wasn't strictly appropriate, but he just couldn't help himself. She was alive and it was so overwhelming he could barely breathe. "God...it's so good to see you. You have no idea..." He closed his eyes and forced himself to breathe. "I missed you. So much.

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what_is_real
2010-08-13 05:33 am UTC (link)

Mal recognized the emotion she heard in Arthur's voice. She'd felt it as soon as Arthur had said on the network that he recognized her. Relief. Relief so acute it cut like a knife, straight through the layers of defense people naturally built up. She understood when he ignored her hand, instead rolling a die on the counter to see... something. There was something he was checking, and the thought of it, the name of it, was right on the tip of her tongue but she couldn't quite make it form completely.

The entire thought of it was wiped from her mind completely as soon as Arthur wrapped his arms around her. Physical contact hadn't been something she'd initiated, or participated in, much since she'd woken up in a strange hospital, not even able to recall her name. But when Arthur pulled her into his arms and clung to her... It felt heavenly. It felt right, like it was where she'd been longing to be all that while.

She slipped her arms around Arthur's waist and pulled him just as close, eliminating every bit of space between them. Mal hid her face in his neck, breathing in the scent of soap and faint cologne and his skin. "I didn't know it until just now... But I missed you too."

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noimagination
2010-08-14 07:57 pm UTC (link)

"That's my totem," he said as he pocketed the die, not even needing to wait for the question. He wasn't sure what she remembered and what she didn't and felt it was better to be safe than to assume she knew things when she might not. "It helps me keep track of what's a dream and what's reality. You have one too." He didn't know if she somehow still had the top, but telling her about it might help at least somewhat. He wanted nothing more than for her to remember.

She felt small and fragile in his arms, even though she had always been anything but. It made him want to protect her, keep her safe from the world. The feel of her, her arms around him, her hair brushing his cheek and the soft exhalation of breath against his neck, was like coming home. He felt alive and at peace and oh so relieved. He almost couldn't bear it.

She smelled the same as she always had, the subtle floral scent of Chanel No. 5 bringing back memories, the way she never had in dreams. She felt the same against him. He didn't know why he'd needed to check his totem, not when it was so obvious this was real. Her shade had never been like this, so warm and gentle and alive. "I'm here now," he promised her. "I'm not going anywhere."

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what_is_real
2010-08-15 01:26 am UTC (link)

Totem... Totem seemed right. Mal rolled the word around in her mind, mouthed it silently against Arthur's skin. It felt familiar and that was such a welcome feeling after so many months, so many years, of strangeness. Equally familiar was the act of being held close. Not just by anyone though. Mal had the feeling that it was being held close by Arthur that was so blissfully normal for her.

She was standing there, enjoying the moment, when Arthur's promise sparked a memory. It hit her hard and fast, like a freight train barreling its way across the tracks.

They were lying in bed, limbs still tangled together, skin still slick with sweat and the result of their love-making. Exhausted, but exhilarated, Mal leaned in and kissed Arthur lovingly, nipping playfully at his lips before reluctantly pulling away. "He's going to be back from Copenhagen soon," she whispered, resting her forehead against his, her arms and torso draped lazily across his chest, running her fingers through Arthur's hair.

"I know," Arthur replied quietly, watching Mal through half-closed eyes. He leaned in and kissed her again, softly. "It's been a lovely two weeks with him gone."

"It's going to be so lonely without you here," Mal pouted, sighing and rolling away from Arthur to lay on her back, breaking their connection. The children were staying with her parents so she and Arthur could 'work' while Dom was away. The only real work they'd done was experimenting to see how many times they could climax.

"Hey," Arthur said, following her as Mal rolled, immediately settling himself comfortably between her legs. "I'm here now. And I'm not going anywhere."

Mal pulled away from Arthur, just enough to look at him comfortably, to take in the high cheekbones and strong jaw that framed his soulful eyes and thin, but expressive, mouth. "Arthur," she whispered, searching his face for the truth. "You loved me, didn't you?"

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noimagination
2010-08-15 01:52 am UTC (link)

He held himself utterly still as her mouth moved against his neck, as if afraid the soft movement would utterly undo him. He was already close to falling apart, composure fraying at the seams. She was just so perfect and real and he didn't know how to cope with the realness of her. It was everything he'd lost and everything he'd wanted and he should have felt guilty, because this was Dom's wife and it should have been Dom standing here, but he couldn't bring himself to care. Because this was Mal. And she was everything.

Then she spoke and his breath stuttered in his chest, caught at the precipice of something he couldn't or wouldn't name. You loved me, didn't you? He wanted to laugh or cry or...something. Anything. Because the question was just so inadequate. And he desperately wanted to lie, to spare them both the heartache that would later come, but he couldn't. He'd always been an open book to her.

"Non," he whispered in her ear, in the language that had been theirs. Dom had always been terrible at French. "Pas 'aimais', Mal. Je t'aime. Je t'aimerai toujours." And then he kissed her because it seemed wrong not to.

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what_is_real
2010-08-15 06:42 am UTC (link)

Hearing those words, whispered so they were forever only for her, was enough to break Mal. She returned the kiss hungrily, forgetting all else as she threaded her fingers through his hair. "Mon amour, je suis désolée que je t'ai quitté," she muttered against his mouth in rapid French, as if one of them would disappear the moment that contact with broken. "Je suis désolée que je t'ai quitté,". Je te promets de ne jamais repartir."

Mal's heart was pounding so hard within her chest, she was sure it was about to burst. The feelings were so sudden and so intense that she could hardly believe they were real, but there was no possible way that they could be fake. Thankfully, they weren't accompanied by any other memories, but she didn't need them right then to know where she belonged, because her place was at Arthur's side, wherever that may be, all others be damned.

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noimagination
2010-08-15 07:22 am UTC (link)

They could barely move apart, and he could feel more than hear the words she spoke as her breath ghosted over his lips. His tongue darted out over his lips nervously as if he was trying to taste her promises. "Tu me manquai," he said. "Tu me manquai plus que je ne pouvais avoir en soi." He sighed, resting his forehead against hers and taking a moment to just breathe her in. "Si ce n'est qu'un rêve, je ne voudrais pas de me réveiller." If this was nothing more than a dream, he would rather fall into Limbo than ever wake up.

He knew in his heart, this was wrong. He knew that he should put aside his feelings before this got messy and someone got hurt. But he had spent years at Dom's side, had given up everything for him, and now he just wanted something for himself. Someone for himself. Mal. "We should..." he trailed off, switching back to English. "We should go to the apartment. It's getting late and you need to get settled in. I'll stay the night...if you want me to." He didn't want to presume, or take things too quickly, even if it felt like there was no way they could possibly take things to quickly.

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what_is_real
2010-08-15 07:39 am UTC (link)

Mal didn't want to move, didn't want to break the addictive, heady spell that seemingly swirled around them, separating the two from the rest of the world. The last couple of years had been hard, for Mal because she didn't know where she'd come from and had been forced to start fresh, and for Arthur because he'd thought she'd died. She couldn't imagine the amount of pain that had brought him, and anything that hurt her darling Arthur hurt Mal.

She drifted her lips against his again, eyes closed shut tight unless this world proved to be a dream. She didn't want it to be a dream. She wanted this to be reality so badly she could taste it.

"Ce n'est pas un rêve. C'est le réveil."

She pulled back when Arthur spoke in English, just a tiny bit, just enough to nod. "Please stay with me. I'm not ready to let you go yet. Not after so long without you."

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