Asuka had almost completely missed Sakura’s presence, simply staring at the dent in the wall where the laptop had collided with it. Only when she spoke did her eyes even flicked over to her, appearing seemingly empty of all emotion. She shrugged, not having the energy to even think about talking about it with her. She had to keep it together – she had to save her strength to do that. She had to. She couldn’t lose it. Not again. She’d cried once already while in this damned place, but now – now she had felt much like she had when she’d slipped into an almost catatonic state years ago. Why did emotions have such a heavy impact on her? Why couldn’t she be normal?
She turned to walk back to her bed, her eyes brimming with tears as she took two shaky steps in its direction. It was then that her knees buckled and she stumbled, cursing quietly under her breath. They gave out again and this time, she fell to the floor, her knees hitting it with a crash as she wrapped her arms around herself, a mixture of a sob and another scream erupting from her as she shut her eyes tightly, the tears pouring out of her as her whole body began to shake as badly as her hands had moments before. She could practically feel her mentality breaking.
“I HATE HIM.” She screamed through her sobs, not sure if she really meant it but knowing it was a predominant thought at that particular moment. She wanted to die – that’s what she wished right then. She had had a chance, but somehow she’d survived. Somehow she made it through it and she’d questioned why ever since. It ran through her head constantly, normally ignored and masked with her wall of anger, but now, in that fragile state, it was screaming in her mind and she couldn’t stop it. She was going to vomit from how hard she was crying – she just knew it.
“Why didn’t they kill me? Why did they only leave me for dead?” She hadn’t meant to say it out loud,