A bond is formed Who: Mac and Ash Where: Ash's Place When: Late Afternoon - February 10
It had been well past two days since Mac had learned what happened to Lucy. It had been all over the television and written about in the newspapers that a person would have to have been a recluse on a deserted island to not have heard about it. And it had taken just about that long for the teen to work up the courage to leave her cousin's house to walk the few houses down to Ash's place. The guy had helped her when she needed it no questions asked, and the least Mac felt she could do now was reciprocate, though what she'd say or do the girl had no clue as she was nowhere good with these kinds of situations. Finding herself at the guy's front door, Mac took a deep breath as if summoning up the courage to press a finger to the front bell.
Throughout the last two days, Ash had systematically ignored every visitor he'd had. He was tired of people forcing their pity on him, trying to feel better about themselves by being kind. Fuck that... he wanted to be alone. He'd let his sister in... and had no choice but to temporarily let Meredith in. But everyone else? No way.
He'd been about to ignore this one too... when he sensed that strange aura, and recognized who it was. Hm. Interesting. The girl who'd spooked and run off was now suddenly back? Even in his current mental state, Ash had to admit his curiosity was piqued.
Taking his time, he made his way to the front door and opened it, looking pale, gaunt, and truthfully like he hadn't slept a single wink since everything happened.
"...yes?"
"Hi." Mac returned softly when Ash opened the door to her, the guy definitely not looking his best. And it made her wonder if he even remembered her from the way he presently looked and the greeting she received when he opened the door. "I can go... " And though she offered Mac really wasn't wanting to leave, it's just all this was making things awkward for her and made Mac want to just go like a frightened little bird who had fluttered off after being startled into flight.
"...Mackenzie. Please. Come in." Why Ash was doing this, he wasn't sure. Maybe it was because some part of this skittish young girl reminded him of Lucy. Maybe it was because he was just tired of forcing people away. One way or the other, he stepped aside, motioning her in. His face looked haunted, broken... his voice robotic and stoic.
Mac smiled hesitantly at the invitation and then stepped into the house when Ash stepped aside to give her room to enter. "I should have come by sooner." She said softly partly to thank him for what he had done for her and partly to pay her respects for his loss.
"There... was nothing you could have done, Mackenzie." He said, lowering his gaze to fight the tears from forming again. he placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing lightly. "You have your own life to live. One that's hopefully better than when I last saw you."
"One that I wouldn't have if it weren't for you... and Buffy." The girl informed him with a lift of her hand to lay it gently for a brief moment on the one he had placed to her shoulder. "I just....I just wish there'd of been people there for me when my parents were killed. Maybe there's nothing I could have done, but there might be things I can do now." What they might be she wasn't sure, maybe all she could do was just be there for him to listen and try to understand.
"No good can come of being close to me." He said it not in self-pity, but sadly in a form of self-realization. "And you deserve better than to lose thie new life of yours because of me. "You know... I never realized it before... your eyes remind me a little of hers. Of Lucy's." He gave her a soft smile, one that was so blatantly forced, but needed, that he wondered if he'd ever know real happiness again.
"I don't want to lose one of the only friends I have." Mac frowned with sadness. "Would...would Lucy want you to shut youself off from everyone?" She questioned. Mackenzie hadn't really known Lucy, but she was sure the girl wouldn't have wanted Ash to go all destructo boy to avenge her death.
"No. She wouldn't." He responded simply. He knew that much. All she wanted was for him to be happy. She seemingly had been dedicating her very life to it. And look where that got her. Sadly... he was too selfish to care right now. "I... I just feel so lost without her. It's like I'm trying to walk through speeding traffic... blindfolded."
"I know it feels like that now, but.... " Mac sighed softly knowing that whatever she might say to him would only be taken as just words with no real meaning behind them at this point. "Just take time before you do anything reckless that you can't undo, Ash."
"Mackenzie... I want to ask you for something. A favor, you might say." He sighed, hoping that she'd do this, and not ask too many questions about the why's or when's. "And it's something very important to me."
"What?" The teen asked in return knowing she couldn't in good concious agree to something without first hearing what his request of her was. Mac would do just about anything for the man who helped get her life back for her, outside of anything that might bring harm or worse to him.
"I... won't be working with Buffy anymore. I can't. But I want you to check in on her from time to time. Make sure whoever Mr. Giles puts her with... takes care of her." He could feel it, inside him: the last bit of compassion and love he still had in him slowly ebbing out.
Mac couldn't voice an answer all she could do was nod her agreement as she felt tears begin to well within her dark eyes as it was sounding like Ash was saying goodbye to all he knew. That he was about to embark on a mission of revenge from which he knew he would not be coming back from.
"You're... a compassionate, beautiful young girl, Mackenzie. Protect the ones you love... and you should have a great life ahead of you." He said sincerely, even though that voice in his head was now wondering if she'd truly be alright even if he found a way to warp the realities like he was considering.
Mac couldn't say anything for fear of breaking down in front of the guy, so with a swipe of fingers to her eyes to brush away the slip of a couple tears the teen moved toward Ash to hug him tight. "Don't do this." The teen almost choking on the words she barely managed to whisper out knowing that they wouldn't be heeded, but feeling they needed to be spoken.
Dammit. He didn't want to cry. He'd done a fabulous job of not breaking down, except in front of his sister. But the girl... her innocence in spite of everything that had happened to her... it reminded him enough of that light inside Lucy that he lost it, and hugged her back, whimpering a little, his body shuddering.
"Promise me.... promise me you'll... you'll come back." Her arms seemed to wrap tighter around the guy as Mac struggled to get her words out. Her life had just gotten back on track and the teen didn't want to lose anyone close to her for fear it might throw her back a couple steps ruining all the progress she had made since her escape.
"I don't like lying to people, Mackenzie." His voice... oddly enough since he'd never met her, was beginning to sound like his 'daughter from the future'. All emotionless and... monotone. Like any kind of heart inside him was being torn from his body. "All I can say is... I'll try."
Mac slowly pulled away from him to give an understanding nod. That he would try was really all she could ask for. "I'm sorry." Mac whispered in a tone that was barely audible as she swiped at her eyes. She hadn't meant to crack like she did. It hadn't been her intent as she had originally come over to offer whatever comfort she could to the guy.
He sighed, giving the girl a little, tiny kiss on the forehead. Why he had such a soft spot for her, he wasn't sure. He had since he and Buffy helped her, really. Perhaps it was that strange combination of the part of her that reminded him of Lucy,... and the part that reminded him of HIMSELF.
"Don't ever apologize. You've done nothing. You're...a good friend."
The teen's eyes closed and a faint whimper slipped out when Ash pressed a brief kiss to her forehead. "You are too." Mac said opening her eyes to look up at the guy. "Don't forget that there are people here that need you." Mac knew there was really nothing more she could say to stop him from doing the inevitable, so the girl didn't even try to. What Mac did then kind of surprised her, but she did it without much thought and it was done before it even registered with the teen. Mac lifted up on her toes and kissed Ash on the cheek before she spun around, hurried to the door and raced from the house.
Ash just watched her go, placing a hand to that spot on his cheek... his expression saying one thing only: "...what the FUCK?"