"It was my fault," she said in a harsh burst of noise. "And hers. And his. We were all stupid, all so prideful and shortsighted. But it is I fate has chosen to punish, the eternal whipping boy for a hellish situation. I who love him still, hopelessly, while he smiles and calls me friend."
Anger that Lexi didn't even realize was there boiled out, resentment and guilt and desperation that couldn't be contained. She bowed her head for a moment, fighting all of it with all the strength Lancelot once brought to bear on those who dared oppose the crown and his beloved king. Finally she raised her eyes, feverish and sad. "I want--"
Then, with an anguished little sound, Lexi leaned forward to catch Cecilia's lips with her own. She just wanted so very much to not be alone.