bella sees your italic caps and raises you a bold (mostdevoted) wrote in blurred_lines, @ 2009-06-21 15:46:00 |
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Entry tags: | ! [1980-06] june, bellatrix lestrange (née black), narcissa malfoy (née black) |
Who: Bellatrix, Narcissa and bb Draco
When: June 21, 1980, late morning
Where: Malfoy Manor
What: Sisterly chatting
Rating: Low
Status: Completed Log
"You can leave," Narcissa said for what felt like the hundredth time. "We are fine, and I will call if I need anything. Just go and tell the elves to send Mrs Lestrange here when she arrives." Irritation came quickly these days, and Narcissa was beginning to wish they had picked a more malleable nanny. Besides, Draco was her baby. Her baby who was just awake and sleepily blinking pale eyes (and if he could speak, Narcissa was quite sure he would be telling the nanny to leave as well).
Narcissa slumped back against the pillows with a sigh as the woman left, wondering again when the master bedroom would return to its former serenity, instead of being a place where Healers, nannies, and relatives felt comfortable parading in and out of. It was purely wishful thinking, considering the number of places Narcissa could go herself at the moment were strictly limited. So instead of dwelling on it, she turned her attention back to Draco and kissing his tiny perfect fingers, carefully looking away from the lists and piles of potions.
True to her word, Bellatrix's first task upon arriving at Malfoy Manor was not to head straight to her sister's side but to deal with the healers who truly did seem to be swarming around the place. It was little wonder that Narcissa was feeling irritated and overwhelmed as only a few minutes of dealing with them herself was enough to set Bellatrix on edge. Not that it was a particularly difficult task where she was concerned. Most, at least, had willingly accepted her suggestion that they might enjoy a day off, although the one she had accosted outside the bedroom door was apparently more stubborn than the rest and it took a few minutes of arguing that ended with a snapped "Yes, and I assure you that should I fear my sister's imminent death, I shall owl you at once. Now leave," before that healer too was sent on her way.
With a sigh that mirrored Narcissa's, Bellatrix let herself into the master bedroom and sat gently on the side of the bed. A slight frown crossed her face at the sight of her sister still appearing so weak and pale and the infant in her arms was afforded only a cursory glance before her gaze settled on Narcissa's face. "How are you feeling?" she asked, although she could imagine her sister was quite tired of answering that particular question by now, at least on her part it was only out of sisterly concern and not to be followed by fretting. Or poking and prodding.
"Better than yesterday, and much better than last week" Narcissa replied honestly. Whatever excitement from the fuss caused by being an invalid absolutely ceased to exist when one was not acting. "I should be able to go around and do things by the end of this week. Perhaps even leave the Manor for short amounts of time. Or I hope so, anyway. I have memorised every detail of the curtains here." The gardens must be in terrible disarray without the proper supervision, and she privately wondered if anyone had eloped or done something ridiculous in her absence.
"But anyway, look who is awake and so very happy!" The novelty of marvelling to the whole world of how absolutely phenomenal Draco was in every way had no risk of wearing off soon. His eyes were amazing, what little hair he had was superior to any other child's, and there was nothing in the world quite as perfect as his little hands and feet. "Would you like to hold him? He just had a long nap but I daresay there will be another one soon."
"Good," Bellatrix replied with a nod at her sister's description of her condition, pleased to hear that she was feeling better at least and certainly sympathetic to the restlessness and utter boredom that came from being confined to one's bed. Although in her case she suspected she was a good deal less inclined to obey the instructions of a healer. Not that she would encourage Narcissa to do the same.
At Narcissa's offer to let her hold Draco, Bellatrix hesitated for a moment. She was not exactly comfortable with children like so many of her peers, if the women of society could be called as much and she certainly was not one to coo over them but this was her nephew - her sister's child - and that seemed to be inspiring a fair degree of both fascination and wonder on her part. She held out her arms to take the baby with a slight, wry smile. "I would hope that he is happy. He is going to be the most spoiled child in all of society."
"And he absolutely deserves it," Narcissa smiled, handing Draco to her sister. "A Black and a Malfoy. I wonder what he will grow up to be, though if I had my way he would stay exactly two weeks and two days old forever." She continued more seriously, "I think he has already gained some weight, which is of course wonderful. He was so small last week that I began to wonder if we were being ridiculous in naming him after both grandfathers." Two middle names were more appropriate than leaving one out, in any case, and surely Draco Abraxas Cygnus would grow into his name.
Bellatrix took Draco in her arms and stared down at him in mild amazement for a moment before looking back up at her sister. "He will be strong. And he will do them both proud. If the blood in his veins were not enough to assure as much, we will see to it," she said firmly. While Bellatrix was far from the most maternal of creatures, she did have every intention of playing a strong role in her nephew's life. There were things he needed to learn, things Narcissa would never teach him (and some she might object to having him learn at all) and truly Bellatrix even had some doubt over Lucius's ability to mold Draco into a boy befitting of his heritage and his namesakes. Of course she would already be thinking of the instruction in the Dark Arts and duelling that the child would require when he was barely out of the womb. That he would be afforded opportunities other children could only dream of went without saying.
Narcissa leaned over to adjust the elaborate arrangement of roses from their father's parents. "Well, he is lucky to have such wonderful godparents, and I am certain you will teach him fantastically and give him biscuits when I say no." It was important to remember the family that was still there. Draco had so many extended Blacks and Malfoys, Yaxleys, Rosiers, Lestranges... and yet she could not help but wish for the family they had lost.
"Do you remember last Father's Day, when-" Narcissa broke off, suddenly abashed, realising that no, Bellatrix would not remember how painful the day had been, two weeks after their father's murder at the hands of Edgar Bones. She swallowed and tried again, tracing the embroidery on the sleeve of her dressing gown. "Will you come to Highgate Cemetery with me when I can? I was hoping to go on June fifth with Mother, but... we had a birthday instead." The timing of it was bewilderingly strange - considering how many days there were in a year, what were the chances of Draco being born on the day Cygnus had died?
Bellatrix frowned at the reminder of her memory problems and the loss of their father, staring down at the child in her arms rather than look at her sister. She was slowly coming to terms with much of the news of the last nine years that seemed to inundate her every day, even still, but that... It was all but unfathomable that she could somehow forget the death of her own father. The man who she had adored above all others save the Dark Lord himself. And while for Narcissa it may have been a year, for Bellatrix it had not even been two months. A part of her mind still stubbornly refused to accept the news as true despite the fact that he was quite obviously not here and she had thus far avoided visiting the cemetery itself. But it needed to happen.
"I will go," she replied quietly, although when she looked back up at Narcissa, her expression was one of resolve. "His birth date is fitting," she mused. "A sign of the man he will grow to become, I believe. We will see that he takes after Father. And that he will know the great man that his Grandfather was." It was a rare moment of sentimentality on Bellatrix's part, but then their father always had been the one able to evoke such feelings from her.
"Thank you, Bella." A pause as Narcissa played with her wedding ring. "He was a great man, and he should have lived to see all of this." Not just Draco (though that was certainly very important), but the war ending, and things becoming better than the downward spiral his murder had been a part of. "He was a great man, wasn't he? We were very lucky to have him; I think even Sirius and Regulus were jealous." Orion Black had certainly been far more removed from his children's childhood than his brother-in-law. And in truth, there couldn't have been many fathers in pureblood society that had not only forgiven but embraced the idea of having three daughters. But back then, there had always been Regulus, quiet and responsible, to carry on the family name if all else failed. Draco had the blood but not the name, and it was strange to think of a world where that was the next best thing.
Draco chose that moment to make a strange little gurgling sound and Bellatrix looked down at the baby with mild alarm, uncertain as to what had provoked such a noise. She stared at it for a long moment, silently willing the child to remain silent and only once she was satisfied that he was going to obey her wishes, she looked up at her sister. "As they should have been," Bellatrix replied loftily. It was not that she had disliked her uncle, merely that he was but a shadow of a man when compared to their father. Then again, most men were as far as Bellatrix was concerned. "Perhaps if they had more of Father's influence..." she began before deciding that was decidedly not a train of thought that she wished to indulge. "Father would be proud of you," she said, changing the subject quite abruptly. "To see the woman you have become. And your son." Bellatrix could scarcely believe it herself as the sister she remembered was but a schoolgirl and now here she was, married and with a son of her own. "I am proud of you," she added as a bit of a soft afterthought.
"Thank you. It matters to me so much, Bella." Narcissa had always held her oldest sister in the highest esteem, and her praise was not something to be taken lightly. Druella had been thrilled, of course, but this was different. She rather wondered what Andromeda would think of it; after all, it had not been that terribly long ago when she had sought the guidance of two sisters instead of one. But it was entirely nonsensical and best not to speak of such things.
Narcissa laughed a little as she watched Bellatrix essentially stare Draco into silence. "Occasionally," she began unhelpfully, "He does make noise. And spits up, but I think it's rather endearing. Moments like that probably cause Lucius to think that no, they are not identical in every way." Everything Draco did was endearing, really, and whatever was not was efficiently taken care of by the nanny.
No, Narcissa's comments were certainly not helpful and Bellatrix cast a suspicious eye at Draco, as if silently daring him to spit up on her. For a moment she considered just handing him back to her sister before it even became an issue but he seemed to be behaving himself for the moment and she gave a slight nod of satisfaction. Even if she could not hold back a slight admonishment of, "Behave."
It was likely a good thing that she was never to become a mother.
"If Lucius has taken to spitting up and gurgling, I am not certain I wish to know," she pointed out with a slight smirk, although the mental image was quite amusing. "I do not believe I could ever find being spit upon endearing. The noise, perhaps, but are you quite certain you are feeling all right?" she teased. She did actually understand that there was apparently something about motherhood that made normally sensible women tolerate all manner of disgusting things. Or at least she knew. Understanding was a bit of a stretch as frankly it left her rather baffled.
"Oh, you know I did not mean that," was Narcissa's weak retort, though she was smiling herself. "And I do not think I shall ever feel alright again - I am either giddy or exhausted all the time, but it is not bad, really. Before he was born... I suppose I thought my life would be as it was before, simply with another person in it. But it certainly is not."
She had wanted a baby since Regulus had been a baby, and with all the tears and grief and Healers that had surrounded them for months even before Draco's conception, he did deserve to be the center of the universe for a while. Or maybe longer than a while. "But I daresay I never found anything nearly as endearing about other babies," Narcissa conceded. "Draco is quite extraordinary."
"He certainly will be," Bellatrix agreed with an uncharacteristically soft smile. Although there seemed to be very little extraordinary about the baby in her mind as he was right now nothing more than a sleeping infant, what he would become was another matter entirely.
It was somewhat strange - even with her memory loss, Bellatrix was still accustomed to being in the position of the wiser, more experienced older sister who had some wisdom (however welcomed or not) for everything. And yet this, motherhood and child rearing, was all but unfathomable. Was that not the point of nannies? To ensure that the women of society could continue to live their lives as they pleased after having a child? Then again, Bellatrix knew her sister well enough to know that Draco would be entrusted to the nannies as infrequently as possible.
"You must be tired of spending all of your time in bed. I would have destroyed half the room by now. Would you like to take a walk?" She was not sure if Narcissa would be up for it but it seemed as if it might be good for her. Or perhaps she simply wanted a distraction of her own from how out of her element she was.
"That would be nice," Narcissa admitted. "I have become far too familiar with the walls and ceiling here, but I suppose we will have to stay on this floor, in any case." She did not really wish to think about stairs at the moment or what the Healers would say if she did. Bellatrix was a far better match for them than she was, in any case.
She glanced at Draco, whose eyes were beginning to crinkle with characteristic sleepyness. "I suppose he'll be taking his second nap now, which gives us a little time at least." This walk was going going to be more of a parody of one, Narcissa could tell already, involving more leaning on Bellatrix and nodding to portraits than actual motion. Already she was counting days until things would be normal and she could run up and down stairs and plan the gardens. But of course, normalcy would have a different meaning now, and that was alright.
Bellatrix nodded and turned her attention towards the door to the bedroom. "To whichever one of you insufferable women has been lurking outside the door, you may enter now," she said, raising her voice just enough so that her impatient tones would be heard. The nanny immediately came bustling in and Bellatrix handed Draco off to her with a comment of, "You see? Both the child and mother are perfectly fine even without your meddling."
She shot Narcissa a look of I do not know how you put up with this before standing and going to help her out of the bed. "Now let us see about providing you with a change of scenery."