InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I bought it on a blanket!!!!"

Tony Stark is characteristically hyperverbal. (the_iron_man) wrote in avengers_net,
@ 2018-02-27 19:00:00

Entry tags:

- text, pepper potts, tony stark

text to Pepper

> Hi!
> Couple quick questions/requests.
> Got a minute?

(Post a new comment)

	twelvepercent 2018-02-28 03:05 am UTC (link)
	>I have more than a minute for you. >maybe even 3. >what do you need? (Reply to this) (Thread)

the_iron_man
2018-02-28 03:13 am UTC (link)

> Three whole minutes? I feel special.
> Are there two security openings at any of the facilities?
> Because an alien and a space cowboy need jobs after helping bust me outta jail.
> And I know you aren't a realtor, but I think you'd make a great one anyway?
> Are there any properties we own that has a 3 bedroom available?
> Also. What are you wearing? Is it sexy or are there fuzzy pajama pants?
> Or is it sexy fuzzy pajama pants?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	twelvepercent 2018-02-28 03:16 am UTC (link)
	>you are the most special person I know. >I'll check with HR >can they pass for human though? it might be a problem otherwise. >I'll check on that too. >of course. I always lounge around in lingerie when I'm alone. >why don't you come over and find out? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2018-02-28 03:23 am UTC (link)
	> Thanks, honey! Unless you meant it in a short bus kinda way. > Yep, they do look human to everyone else. > If you see her as green, just...well, she's green. You'll get over it. > I was buried in circuit board repairs but huminawhatnow? > I hate that I have to use Uber to sneak over there. > I hate even more that I'm going to be a little horny while using Uber. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	twelvepercent 2018-02-28 03:28 am UTC (link)
	>I mean it in several ways. >Green? Okay. I like green. >Don't get yourself banned from Uber again, Tony. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2018-02-28 03:34 am UTC (link)
	> Ouch! Wounded. > Green. > I like green too. She seems nice. She was at Thor's party. > That was ONE time, Pepper. > And it was unrelated to horniness. > I was drunk. Was it unrelated to horniness? > Marry me in the back of an Uber and then we can both get banned for what happens, afterward. > Live dangerously with me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	twelvepercent 2018-02-28 03:38 am UTC (link)
	>I have My Little Pony bandaids... >I'll let you know what HR has. >It was probably related. It usually is. >Tony... don't say things you don't mean. >I already do. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

the_iron_man
2018-02-28 03:45 am UTC (link)

> You know they made Iron Man bandaids? I want those.
> I'm not a Bronie ok Pepper why do you have MLP bandaids?
> It's like offering me MIDOL.
> TY for checking HR.
> It's not always related to that.
[thirty seconds later]
> Maybe it is a little bit.
> There was that time after the palladium thing that I tasted coconut AND felt horny.
> What if I did mean it?
> Lets fly to Vegas and take an Uber through a drive thru wedding chapel.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	twelvepercent 2018-02-28 04:13 am UTC (link)
	>It's a long story. >IT WAS MOTRIN, TONY. >so many strange things make you horny. >I wish I knew whether you were serious. Just for once. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

the_iron_man
2018-02-28 04:40 am UTC (link)

> There's a long story about why you have MLP bandaids?
> Do you have a side bitch, Pep?
> Is he into MLP? Or MOTRIN?
> There's still something fundamentally wrong w/that because I DON'T GET CRAMPS ON MY CYCLE, PEPPER.
> On the topic of horny things, what kind of lingerie is it?
> I kinda want you to wear it while I'm being 100% serious.
[one minute later]
> Maybe a limo through the drive-thru wedding chapel instead.
> You don't know who else was germing up the backseat of an Uber car.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	twelvepercent 2018-02-28 04:55 am UTC (link)
	>No, Tony. >Just no. I'm not going there. >The kind of lingerie that's so delicate it might just rip off. >That does sound better. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2018-02-28 05:06 am UTC (link)
	> Ouch burned myself. Need a MLP bandaid. > Lets go there. > Lets pretend I'm your side bitch. > Because hey, look at this, side bitch just got himself an Uber ride. > I'm yelling at my babysitters that I've got an Uber ride. > T-minus twenty minutes until we do an integrity test on that lingerie? > Need to test drive it before Vegas drive thru. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	twelvepercent 2018-02-28 05:51 am UTC (link)
	>I'll kiss it and make it better. >You're on your way? Really? >I'll be in the bedroom. I don't think I should answer the door in this. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2018-02-28 05:59 am UTC (link)
	> I'm on my way. > You really can kiss it and make it better. > I'll let myself in. (Reply to this) (Parent)