|Thor Odinson (tordenguden) wrote in avengers_logs,|
@ 2019-09-16 15:43:00
|Entry tags:||-complete, jane foster, thor odinson|
Who: Thor and Jane
What: Talking about the future part 10239432
When: Immediately after the wedding ceremony
The ceremony was beautiful, although Thor hadn't expected otherwise. After everything was said and done, there were a few hours of downtime before the first of many feasts. Because of that, he decided he didn't want to stay in his highly formal armour any longer and asked Jane if she would go back to the house with him.
It was supposed to be their house, but since that strange time jump and her bill of clean health, they hadn't gone so far as to officially state it as their residence. In a way, Thor didn't mind, considering everything that was going on in his mind.
Normally, he shared his thoughts with Jane on a regular basis but this .... well, before he proposed anything, he wanted to ensure that he had it all figured out. And he thought he did. Especially after seeing the solemnity on Loki's face, the sincerity on Val's -- Brunnhilde's -- ...
It was the right decision.
Now he just had to get Jane on board.
"Jane," Thor asked, standing in front of the bedroom mirror while he shed himself of the armour. "Would you still love me if I wasn't a king?"
It was also apparently best to just get it out as quickly as possible.
The ceremony was lovely and fascinating from an anthropological angle. Jane was probably the first human to attend an Asgardian wedding in thousands of years and she couldn't help feeling aware of it. Sitting beside Thor, she was aware of her honor, and aware of the eyes on her. The break after the ceremony was a welcome one after that.
Jane had less to work to change. She simply had to unbuckle an ornamental half-breastplate that was over her dress. Jane would leave the Asgardian dress on without the armor piece, altogether much simpler than Thor, who needed to change clothes, She was seated on the edge of the bed, waiting for Thor.
"What? Would I - That's a ridiculous question."
"Is it?" Ever since she'd known him, the weight of the crown had loomed over them both, his brief exile notwithstanding. And then there were those years apart while he was helping repair his world, followed by a short time together and then another separation -- again, due to the duties he needed to fulfill. It was why he didn't take their relationship for granted now.
The formal armour now pooled around his feet and he moved it aside, debating if he should change out of his leathers. It was nice to be in his cultural garb again though. "I suppose it could be seen as one. It's simply a question, Jane...which you haven't answered." He caught her eye in the reflection of the mirror. Part of him was teasing, but there was part of him that wanted to know.
Jane had been half laying back on her elbows, and she straightened now with an expression closely akin to thunderous.
"Yes. It is. Thor, why would you think I would ever be conditional? That king or no king would actually make a difference with me?"
"Because I've always been royalty. Maybe I should have worded it better," he conceded. "Would you love me more then if I wasn't." Or was that really a better question?
He sighed and gripped the edge of the dresser, looking down for a moment. This wasn't really going the way he had thought, although to be fair, he hadn't really thought much further than needing to tell her what he felt. "I'm going to give Val and Loki the crown for a time. I don't want it." A pause before he added. "At least, not right now. Maybe 3, 6 months. Take a break. They're more than capable of taking care of everything, as evidenced by the wonderful work they've done here in New Asgard. I was barely present during all that time, and yet here we are. And it's perfect. And you're healthy. And I just want to be Thor for a while." He finally looked up and gave her a wry grin. "I've only ever had that for a weekend...."
"We've had a hard year - or however long it's been. Time's passed for other people but not for us. We can talk about needing a break and it makes sens but," Jane looked up at with pursed lips and eyebrows knit, "I don't know why you think my feelings are conditional."
"It's not that I think that," Thor explained patiently. "No, never, and I can see now how that was poorly worded initially. It's simply that I know you do not wish to be Queen. Although you have not said as much, I know that to be your truth. I wonder if you have felt that pressure..."
He trailed off. Turning around, he looked at her properly, still leaning on the drawer for support.
"And we haven't discussed the future or anything in sometime and today, being here...I don't know that you felt comfortable." Another sigh. "Forget I said anything. These are half formed thoughts that should never have been aired. Let us go back to the feast, my love."
Jane reached up and pinched the bridge of her nose. "You are the worst at bringing things up and then trying to take it back. Just wait a second. You can't just," she waved a hand, "one second." She took a breath.
"Yes, I do feel pressure. I feel a lot of pressure. Because you're right - I don't want to be queen. That's not a job I ever wanted and I don't know what that means for us. So when you say you want to give it up for awhile, I want to know what that means."
"It means what I said. I would take a brief respite from the duties of the monarchy, and recenter myself, after which point I would then take the mantle up again with a clearer head. From what I understand, you did have a conversation with Loki regarding your role other than being a queen. In all honesty, Jane, I accept whatever role you wish to have as long as you're by my side. I can't lie -- I would be thrilled if you agreed to marry me and be my queen but that really changes nothing. If you are a consort, you will still have the respect and love of my people as I respect and love you. Our children will still be heirs to the throne." The only thing he wasn't sure if they could be married by Asgardian standards.
He'd have to talk to Loki a bit more.
"Yes, I get the bodice-ripper title." The comment wasn't exactly fair. Jane turned down queen, she didn't have much standing to sneer at the her remaining option. "I'm always afraid you're being optimistic about your people. I'm still just a human, with a set of beliefs and culture very different than theirs. What if your people don't agree? Especi
ally now that - " Oh god, was she really going there? " - Now that Sif is back."
Thor didn't really like where this conversation was going, because what she was saying wasn't something he hadn't thought about before....but when she was ill, and in their complex back in New York, his people had treated her respectfully..as far as he knew, at least. He'd never heard or witnessed otherwise. Sure, some of the elders might be perturbed, but this was a new era for them, an opportunity to show how they were able to fit in with Midgard. He was happy to lead that example.
And then she brought up Sif, and he basically froze in confusion.
"What does Sif's return have to do with our relationship?"
Everyone had been polite but everyone knew Thor would come down hard on anyone who wasn't. It might also be the Asgardian perspective on time. Jane's life, such as it was, was fleeting compared to an Asgardian lifespan. Or maybe it was a projection of her own worries, the ways she still felt like she didn't quite fit in. Jane thought about the wedding ceremony she'd just witnessed. Beautiful but not much like the traditions in a Jewish wedding.
And now she and Thor were far off the path of his proposed sabbatical. Jane waved a hand. "She's just here and perfect and if any of your people really do want an actual queen you can't get any better than her."
It took Thor a moment to understand what she was saying.
Jane. His perfect, wonderful, confident, beautiful soulmate was ...jealous? Of Sif? The thought was laughable for Thor, and he couldn't help but chuckle a little bit. "Oh Jane. My heart, no. Do not for a moment think you have to compete with Sif, one of my oldest friends. Not once in our lengthy friendship have we ever been anything more than friends. I have always greatly respected her as a warrior first. Her prowess on the battlefield is admirable, and yes, she was always part of the inner court, but ... you are everything to me. Everything."
Pushing off from the dresser, he dropped down to her level, kneeling on the floor in front of her. "The title of Queen will not be bestowed on anyone but you. And if you never wish it, so be it. Never, in my entire life, have I ever felt this way about someone. I want children with you, Jane Foster. I want our children. I assure you, before the thought never crossed my mind and now ... now I find myself lost in thought sometimes, picturing a daughter with your curls..." He reached out and lightly tugged on one of her tendrils, smiling softly. "Please don't be jealous of Sif. Can you not be friends with her? She could be an ally for you, as she is for me."
Jane turned her face away frowning a little at his laugh. Being called out on her jealousy was shameful, like being caught in a bad habit. It was made worse that she could see her own ridiculousness. Jane trusted Thor and din't think he was about to go running off with Sif. "I know. I know. And I'm not not friends with SIf. But if she wants to develop any flaws, that'd be fine with me."
He gave her a look before cupping her face with his hand, his thumb slowly caressing her cheek. "You really are jealous," he said in a slow wonder. Getting up, he sat down next to her on the bed and pulled her in for a hug. "Here I am, describing our children to you and yet you continue to speak of Sif....perhaps this break from Asgard will be good for the both of us."
Thor hadn't finished getting dressed and his skin was warm. Jane turned her face into his shoulder. "It's not something I feel good about. And maybe we take a break, Take some time to recover from our hard year and maybe make a plan about having a family."
He wanted to make a joke about how he didn't blame her -- he really was a catch but she didn't seem in the mood for that. Instead, he tightened his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. "I would like that," he responded softly.
"Okay. Deal." Jane sealed it with a quick kiss and then leaned back. "Can you help unbuckle my armor piece while you're here? When do you think you'll talk to Loki and Valkyrie? Do they go on some elaborate honeymoon?"
Thor never needed much encouragement to take Jane's clothes off. Unbuckling the chest piece, he trailed kisses down the side of her face, and her neck, letting the piece fall slowly from his fingers. "I'll talk to them when I have a chance," he said breathlessly into her skin. "And I do not know what they will do after the festivities. It will last a week. They will most likely go and recover elsewhere, so I suppose that would be a type of honeymoon...but I do not wish to discuss what my brother will do with his wife while I am here, with the love of my life, who has asked me to help her undress....."
"We have to actually go back to your brother's wedding..." But Jane was laughing a little and turning her head to press a kiss against the corner of Thor's mouth. She supposed Thor was the expert on Asgardian etiquette and if he thought they had a few more minute, she'd follow his cues.