Re: More log format
"That could be, but it's always easier to look back on the past then it is to look at the present. How long are you going to punish yourself for the situation you were in? How long until you allow yourself to move past it and truly live?" He shook his head. It was something he had known all about for years, and something he hadn't actually put into practice until just recently. He hadn't started it again until Kyle himself had come into Jason's life more fully. -- "...I can't fix it," he spoke softly, shaking his head. "..I can't make it better." Apparently he planned on torturing himself forever, for the simple reason that he could not raise the dead. the boy had no religion, no true view of justice or a 'system' outside of Revolve, the idea of forgiveness was quite lost on him. -- Jason shook his head. "No. That's not acceptable. The only one still holding on to it is you. You have to forgive yourself or else you will never fix it no matter what. If you don't let it go then you also refuse to let those people move on, dead or alive as they may be. You're still connected to them by begrudging yourself the ability to move on, and by doing that, you're dragging them with you." Then his voice softened again, back to that gentle caring tone. "You need to let it go, whelp." -- He closed his eyes tightly, a new wave of guilt hitting him. Dragging them with him? He couldn't even remember half their faces, yet he was still hurting them? That was something he had never considered, and something the boy did take seriously. "...I didn' have a choice..." he said with a slow sigh at long last. "At Revolve.. I tried not t' fight... they pushed me... I couldn'... 'elp it." There was a kind of understanding reaching his voice. So many years, so many forced fights that had ended in gory, bloody deaths. He had played light of many, flicked blood and sang songs, and rotted in his guilt privately for so long. Those mutants had had no choice but to fight him.. but he'd had no choice in the matter either. Generally, they had attacked first, they had driven him to the point of fighting back. The idea that he could forgive himself for that was something new and novel. -- Jason simply nodded, listening. There was very little choice on that isle of the damned, and so he could only imagine how much worse it could be for some of the mutants there. It was also one of the reasons why he had pulled Kyle from that hell hole when he had. No one deserved the wrong type of ownership, and many of the mutants had rugged pasts just like the both of them had. Having to then serve humans in many of the ways that the island enforced upon it's children was only making it all worse. One day the would get free and they would all reign down terror upon the human populations near by. Until then, the owners would still have the upper hand. Today was not that day. "They don't give you a whole lot of choice over there, my friend. That's why I brought you here." -- He swallowed slowly, shifting his face to press it against Jason's shoulder. He was damaged to the point where almost every part of his body produced pain when touched, but he still needed that comfort. It was the feral in him, he needed to be close, near, not having that for so long on Revolve had helped drive to his poor mental state. "...thank you," he muttered thinly, utterly at a loss for anything else to say, somehow feeling lighter in his chest.