Sara had to look away as Tracey spoke of Heidi. It hurt her so much, but she knew she had no right. Of course Tracey had loved Heidi, she had treated Tracey better that Sara ever had. She hung her head in shame as Tracey mentioned what she had done on that day. "You were better off." She said solemnly. "You were better off with Macavoy than you would have ever been with me."
"I say that because if I let that happen, if I let myself feel for you, I know I run the risk of loving you too much and making some stupid mistake and ending up without anything." She looked to Tracey, "Then I couldn't provide for you, if we ended up together and certainly not for Nicolas. I want you to have the best life possible, and to do that, it can't be with me."
"Because you let me be me!" she sighed. "It's selfish and I know al I'm doing is hurting you with my stupid, cruel defense mechanism, but I can't help myself. When I'm with you, I feel alive."