Who: Vanessa and Josh (and OT Alex), then Pete Wisdom When: Backdated to Wednesday, a little after dinner Where: The halls What: An explosion of words and emotions Rating: High for strong language
The summer wasn’t going very well. Vanessa knew she shouldn’t have expected anything better; she didn’t deserve anything better. She had betrayed her friends and peers for absolutely nothing, nothing but her own lack of self-worth. She kept going how she could have avoided every tragedy. If she’d only talked to any of the people she trusted – and she’d grown close to so many and given so many opportunities! As Ness walked toward the halls looking for Josh, however, she reminded herself that she had to stop living in the past. What had happened sucked, but it had happened and there was no longer any way for her to change that. She had to move on, forge new trust, and atone for her past rather than wish it had never happened.
She had thought training would help her work toward that, proving to teammates that she could still be trusted. The opposite had happened. Their team ranked right toward the bottom, and arguments and walk-outs happened more often than training. She didn’t know how to rectify anything. Josh was team leader and he hated her more than any other member of her team. Vanessa could see Rahne as Josh’s shadow, neither showing much interest in training. Laura still scared the hell out of Vanessa, even though she knew the feeling with hypocritical. David was new and didn’t hold the same anger the others did, but he had learned of the circumstances. She felt like an outcast in the student body at large, but she had a few friends here and there. She had none in her team, and their teamwork suffered horribly for it.
She wanted to change that. She’d been putting forward her absolute best, only to either fail miserably or feel like it was thrown back in her face. She had to work for a change, and she couldn’t just stand back anymore, hoping for things to change. So after dinner she gathered up her courage and found Josh, on his way up to his dorm. She didn’t want to cause a scene, and counted herself lucky for finding him alone. She knew he was very often surrounded by friends, something she tried hard not to be jealous of. She could remember the times when she could go to him when she needed help, help that he gladly gave, the compassion he had shown and concern he had voiced. Why had she screwed up everything?
Fighting back those bitter feelings, she took a deep breath. “Josh?” she called, with much less certainty than she’d meant. “We… We need to talk.”