Bella Swan. (thevampiregirl) wrote in _equinox_, @ 2008-06-17 00:28:00 |
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Entry tags: | character: bella swan, character: esme cullen, location: cullen home |
Who: Bella and Esme
What: A talk! Mostly about Edward and married life and the transformation.
When: The morning after the wedding.
Where: Cullen household!
Over the week, Bella had slowly been moving her things into the Cullen household. It was weird packing things up and leaving Charlie, but that's the way it was. She was going to be someone's wife now, Edward's wife, and still living at home with Dad... not much of an option. But now it was Saturday morning, and she had been his wife for a total of... fourteen hours (or thereabouts), and she currently found herself in her and Edward's room, somewhat lazily beginning to pack for the honeymoon they would be leaving for in a couple of days. Just a few things she knew she wasn't going to need between now and then, really.
There was a certain sense of quiet in the house that Esme granted to the successful wedding and reception. While no one in her family (besides Bella, now) actually slept, she could sense their need for rest and rejuvenation. So this was her moment to have Bella alone, to talk to her as a mother - and as a woman who had been through her share of encounters with men. Stepping outside of Edward's door, she knocked gently and waited to be granted admittance.
Bella glanced up at the sound of the knock. "Come in," she said and then returned to folding her jeans that she'd been about to place in the suitcase. It was still weird to her to be packing like this, getting ready for a trip that she wasn't sure where they were going to or ultimately why, but Edward wanted the honeymoon and she happily obliged. She looked up again when she saw Esme -- her new mother-in-law -- in the doorway and smiled at her.
"Hello, Bella," she said, gliding into the room, giving the girl a kiss on the forehead as she perched on the edge of Edward's black leather couch.
She smiled a bit more at the kiss and as soon as she had laid the jeans down, decided to halt her little project and focus on her company. It wasn't often Bella had alone time with Esme. She stood from her kneeling position on the floor and then turned to face her, though a bit unsure of what to say. Conversational skills were not her strong point. "Er... how are you?" she asked quietly, her smile going a bit sheepish. Ridiculous question to ask.
"Well, thank you," she said warmly, smiling wryly at Bella's perpetual bashful nature. It was what it was, however, and she found it rather endearing. " ... are you all packed, is everything ready?"
"Not yet," she replied with a small shake of her head. "Just starting. I don't think we're leaving for a couple of more days, so I just thought I'd start in on the stuff I know I won't be needing between now and then." She shrugged a little and then moved over to sit on the couch, her body turned toward Esme, though she relaxed a little into the back of the plush leather cushioning. "Wish I knew exactly what I ought to be packing," she added with a hint of humor in her tone. "But Edward won't tell me where we're going."
"Did he tell you, at least, whether it was necessary to pack for cold or warm weather?" she asked, shaking her head with amusement. Edward's sense of humor seemed to blossom for Bella in a way that they never could manage.
"Ugh, no." Her face twisted into one of playful annoyance and she rolled her eyes a little, before shifting in her seat again so that both of her hands were in her lap, her fingers of her right hand fidgeting a little with the ring on her left. "Wish he would, though."
She caught that fidget with sparkling precision, leaning over to wrap her arm around Bella's shoulder. "Give him his little dalliances, Bella. This is ever so thrilling for him." She paused. "And for you ... ?"
Bella couldn't help a small feeling of warmth go through her body when Esme wrapped her arm around her shoulder, despite the fact that Esme's skin was ice cold. "For me?" She smiled and let out a small sigh, though it was absolutely one of contentment. "I'm happy," she said and glanced up at Esme. "Very happy. It's hard not to be when Edward hasn't stopped grinning like an idiot for the last month."
"It's all very ... " precious, she wanted to say but knew that Bella would take offense to the word. So she smiled. "You know what I mean." A pause. Her tone grew quiet and a little more serious as she turned her head to lock her amber gaze upon Bella. "If you're not sure of anything - "and the way she said it made clear that anything really was up for discussion -- "I'll try to explain it to you."
This was one of those times when Bella had wished her naivety would kick in, and that Esme's meaning behind her words would simply go over her head, but alas. Bella picked up on the inflection and felt her face grow hot within seconds. A not so subtle, and unintentional, reminder of last night with Edward. And not something she was entirely up for discussing right that second. "I... uh, thank you. I'll definitely keep that in mind." Her smile faltered a little, but she managed to keep it on her face none the less, even though she knew her blush was giving her away.
"Not just about sex," she said quickly, her eyes wide because she knew that they had already gone through that. "About ... changing, too. If that's what you want to know about."
Bella felt her face grow even hotter, if that was possible, and the idea that maybe she was suddenly turning into a werewolf popped into her head. "Oh." She let out a nervous laugh and bit down onto her lower lip. "Well, I mean... if you want to tell me..." The realization that Esme was willing to give her the information she hadn't managed to get out of any of the other Cullen's hit her like a ton of bricks and she felt the blood drain from her face, and she leaned a bit closer. "Actually, yeah... I would like to know about that," she said sincerely, her focus completely locked on Esme's face.
Settling back against the back of the sofa, she observed Bella's keen interest and recalled sadly that no one ever told her thoroughly what she would experience prior to ... "You must realize that I was most blessedly unconscious through the greater part of my transformation."
Blessedly unconscious. She knew that the transformation was immensely painful, and was apparently so much that Edward felt the need to protect her from even the details of it. Bella nodded a little, not only in understanding but in a quiet way of telling her to go on with her story.
" ... and if you would like, I think that we can pack a few things into your trunk when it's finally time, to make that happen to you as well." She shook her head. "The strongest memories are fire -- when I would wake, even for the shortest time. I thought I was burning up. I thought -- " she shook her head. "I thought I was in hell. That is, until I saw Carlisle ... " The memories were still vivid. "Waking up from that hellacious sleep, I had my wits about me. It wasn't like the frenzied young vampires you saw when we fought. If someone's with you ... if they teach you how to control and manipulate your thirst ... you can withstand it."
Bella listened intently, and though she felt a knot beginning to grow a little in the very pit of her stomach, she ignored it. She was thankful that Esme was willing to tell her this, to tell her the things no one else would. She smiled a little and nodded, though she pulled her legs up toward her chest and loosely wrapped her arms around her knees all the same. "Well, I... I think we'd been planning on doing... it where all of you were around, too. I know Edward can do this, but he's still so afraid of hurting me, and I just think it would be a huge comfort to him and me if all of you were there to help."
"Well," and she smiled, "there is that." It made her glad that Edward wanted them all there. It would really be a family affair. She stood and placed her hands upon her hips. "I should let you get back to your packing."
"Not that I have much of it to do right now," she added quietly, but with a smile on her lips all the same. She stood again when Esme did. After a moment, she closed the distance between them and gave her a tight hug. "Thank you," she said in a soft whisper.
Esme's cold lips brushed her new daughter's cheek as she smiled, thrilled to see the display of affection from the girl. "You're welcome," she murmured, lifting one hand as she slid out of the room and beyond the door.