Dameron | Black Leader (blackleader) wrote in thedisplaced, @ 2018-02-10 21:14:00 |
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Margo's birthday party had been good times. It had been since probably the autumn festival that Poe had really been in a group of people that sized, and he enjoyed it. Probably he needed to throw parties more frequently himself, considering that he didn't have the same buzz of working with the squadron and towards an end goal, now that he was here there was no Resistance to keep him busy in that way. Of course, at least part of the reason why he was in such a good mood was that the night had been spent largely with the man beside him. Finn had agreed to come, and Finn had been game to dance with him, and it wasn't the first time he'd done so since they'd gotten on the cruise. And now that they were headed out of the party into the air around the open decks, Poe found himself smiling at the memories of that. "You say you don't know how to dance, but you're not bad," he offered, grinning over at Finn as he stuck his hands in his pockets. Finn had been enjoying the time spent with Poe. He didn’t really know what to do when he was at the party. He didn’t know most of the people, but he knew Poe and Rey. It hadn’t taken much to convince him to dance, but he wasn’t really comfortable with the concept of being shirtless in public. He was sure it wasn’t the first time that he’d been only vaguely clothed in front of people since he’d nearly died, but he’d been out of it then. Poe didn’t seem to share his discomfort, which Finn really had difficulty being upset about. Still, he hadn’t really explained himself at all. He’d been nervous, but he was starting to feel like maybe he wasn’t alone in how he felt. It made him wonder if he wasn’t going to have to make the first move this time. The last time, it had been Poe. He smiled over at Poe as they walked. “Well, I’m mostly just following whatever you do. I guess I’m a fast learner.” He let his hand brush against Poe’s arm, not really worrying himself about whether it was allowed or would be acceptable to the other man. He just liked being close, he liked being allowed to touch him...even if it was only a little bit, just a few things. Tonight had been a lot of touching, however. It felt greedy to want more, but he couldn’t help it. “I’m not as good when it’s other people.” A shrug. “Your friend’s friend is definitely super into talking people out of their shirts.” Poe laughed, and nodded. He couldn't help himself. He liked Eliot, even if the man's taste in men was absolutely bewildering to him. And while he didn't know Margo as well, he'd been happy to oblige the request. She seemed nice enough, as really did all of Eliot's friend, and the party itself - well Poe liked that sort of atmosphere. "Yeah, I get the feeling she's generally persuasive," he shook his head, aware of the brush of Finn's hand against his arm. He wanted to reach over and grab his hand, but something made him hesitate for the moment, even if he'd had enough to drink to make him think it probably would go all right if he did. Figuring out that Finn and Rey hadn't been together in Chicago, had made the possibility of something with Finn seem more obtainable, and while Poe wasn't typically one to be shy about the possibility of something more with anyone, he also didn't want to ruin what they had. So the requests had been casual, the sort of thing that could be friends, and maybe he should have been more forthright in what he wanted. He glanced up at the sky, his gaze calculating the stars and trying to decide if they made any sense to him. He could plot courses through the galaxy, but these stars made about as much sense as if someone had sprinkled glitter across black velvet. They were pretty, but told him nothing about where he was. Poe brought his gaze back down and glanced sideways at Finn's profile. "Guess we make a good team and I'm decidedly alright with that." Finn wanted very much for Poe to make a move, to prove that he wasn’t just reading into what was happening too much. He tried not to appear overly desperate, though, which he imagined was easy enough since he wasn’t throwing himself at Poe. He was just trying to casually stay close as if it was normal. Maybe with enough time he’d be more aware of the fact that he was allowed to...or that he should. It was hard to say. “She does seem to come off that way.” But Finn had just not been that easily persuaded. He wasn’t even sure if Poe could have convinced him. At least not in front of people. In private was a very different matter. He looked over at Poe after a moment. “I guess it’s not the first time someone’s asked me to take my shirt off, but she’s not really someone I want to take my shirt off for.” He felt a little nervous saying it. It was more because of a lack of certainty about how it was going to be taken. “We’ve always been a good team,” Finn agreed. “Ever great pilot needs a great gunner at his side.” He felt like there were butterflies in his stomach. He followed Poe’s gaze up to the stars. “They’re really different, aren’t they? I don’t think I ever really got used to looking up and seeing nothing that I really recognized.” "Yeah, they are," Poe agreed. "I'm trying to decide if I even recognize any of them from Tumbleweed, but it's hard to memorize night skies if they aren't in one place and who knows if we're even in the same place in Earth's galaxy - or if this is even a real place… it's not particularly transparent." There was a pang at the words though. He missed his X-wing, and missed flying up among those stars. He'd never felt more free than he was up there among them with his starship. But there was truth in the rest of the statement too - Finn was a good gunner, and Poe would trust him by his side, even if he knew he didn't have loads of reasons to do so. Finn had come out of the First Order though, and he'd come with Poe, and he'd helped them on Starkiller - managed to get the shields down so they could take it out. It was enough, and then there was everything that had happened here. Working up his courage he pulled his hand quickly out of his pocket, and reached for Finn's, taking it in his and tugging him gently towards the railing. He didn't keep hold of it, even if he wanted to, but he instead stepped up and glanced over. "You know, I'm pretty certain you'd have nothing to be ashamed of with your shirt off," he gave Finn a quick grin, hoping it wasn't inappropriate to do so. "But I think you're also allowed to decide who you take it off for." It was probably ridiculously inappropriate to ask if Finn would take it off for him. He buried the question and instead leaned on the railing with one elbow. "I'm glad you came, though. I hope it wasn't too uncomfortable." “I haven’t managed to memorize any of the stars or constellations yet.” So he wasn’t sure that he’d do any better trying to figure out if they were anywhere that made sense. He just knew that he missed the parts of home where they got to fly among the stars. It was a little strange to be grounded for so long, but then he’d been grounded for even longer than this. Chicago had been months and then this was even more. He didn’t know what Texas would hold for him, but he thought maybe it would be fine as long as he had Rey and Poe. The feeling of a hand on his made his heart jump and he looked away from the sky and toward Poe. “I don’t think I have anything to be ashamed of,” he said quietly. “I just don’t know her...and...she’s not the right person.” He averted his eyes at that, not sure he could exactly look at Poe when he said it. In case he saw something that told him that Poe didn’t want that person to be him. “It wasn’t too bad. I mean, it was a little weird, but you were there, so it wasn’t as bad as it could have been.” He felt like he was dropping hints everywhere. He wasn’t sure Poe was getting them. He glanced over, the nerves not having subsided. “So...did…” He frowned momentarily, looking out over the water and trying to decide whether to slide his hand over toward Poe’s. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen this much water.” Rey would not be impressed. Finn might be looking at the water, but Poe couldn't say it held much appeal. Granted he hadn't been on large bodies of water like this often, but right now he was most interested in Finn. Finn who kept talking about the right person to take his shirt off for, and Poe found himself wanting to ask if Finn had any idea who the right person would be, and then half of him was afraid that maybe he was reading too much into this. "I'm glad you were there with me," he said instead. Finn kept agreeing to do things with him, and he hadn't really seemed to indicate that he wanted Rey to do them with them also. Was it crazy to think that might be indicative of something more? Poe pulled a breath in as if that were going to steady him further, but the thing was, there was this warmth that felt as if it was just him and Finn, and the breath really didn't do anything to break that spell. He swallowed. Get it together Poe, just use your words and ask. It's never been this difficult to do that. "You look good in that shirt," he said more seriously. "Whoever's the right person is helluva lucky one." It'd be pretty difficult, he figured, for that to be taken as anything other than what it was. But on the other hand, it wasn't exactly the question he'd wanted to ask either. He reached out for Finn's hand again, lightly wrapping his fingers under the other man's palm and he forced the question out, low and serious, through what felt like breathless lips: "Finn, can I kiss you right now?" Finn knew it was ridiculous to feel like time had slowed down, but he felt it. It was possible that it was just because his breathing had slowed and he looked at his hand and then Poe. He had been so ready for this, had wanted it so much, but now that it was here, he found that he was having difficulty getting the words out. He knew he could have just nodded or leaned in to kiss Poe himself, but he had something he really wanted to say. “I…” He cleared his throat. “Well, I…” Why was he being so ridiculous? Honestly, he was annoying himself. “I thought you’d never ask.” There it was. Simple and he really hoped that it was a good enough response because he wasn’t sure how to make it more obvious if that wasn’t obvious enough. Relief that this was Finn’s response made Poe’s heart beat quicken. A flash of a grin crossed Poe's lips before he leaned in, his free hand coming up to rest on Finn's neck, before he pressed those lips to Finn's warm ones, testing out whether or not it was half as nice to do as he’d dreamed it might be. In Poe’s experience, dreams were rarely as good as reality, and this case proved no different. His fingers spread across the back of Finn’s neck, and his other hand wove his fingers through Finn’s, squeezing them gently. He’d been holding back for months, even since Rey had told him, afraid that maybe asking would be pushing his luck, but this didn’t feel like that, it felt like the best thing that had happened to him since he’d landed with the displaced. Finn felt warm all over and he returned the kiss. He was suddenly glad that he’d already kissed someone before. The first time, he’d just sort of gone with it and hoped that it would be okay. Poe in Chicago hadn’t complained, but he learned as he kissed more often. Now he was at least confident in what he was doing and he wrapped one arm around Poe’s waist and pulled him closer. This felt like coming home and he was happy where he was. After a while, he needed to take a breath, so he pulled back, but only just enough to get a breath. He kept his arm around Poe so that he wouldn’t move away from him. “This took a lot longer the second time around,” he said quietly, leaning in to press a few quick kisses to Poe’s lips just in case he suddenly changed his mind and decided to move away. Poe raised an eyebrow at this comment, even though he was grinning at Finn. He couldn't help himself. Finn hadn't just accepted the kiss, he'd pulled Poe in closer and now they were really embracing as much as kissing, and Poe was perfectly all right with that. "The second time around?" He queried, momentarily confused, but even as he said it, his mind started turning. Rey had been surprised when he'd assumed Finn and her were together in Chicago. She hadn't really said anything about who Finn was with, but… "This isn't the first time you've kissed me." Finn looked down when Poe repeated his words back to him and he shook his head. “No. This isn’t the first time I’ve kissed a version of you. First time I’ve kissed this version of you, though.” It made sense because as much as they were the same person, they weren’t the same person. Experiences had made them different in a way and Finn couldn’t have chosen which one was the one he liked better if he wanted to...and he didn’t. “I’ve wanted to tell you.” His voice was still quiet, as if he thought talking too loud would break the moment. “I just didn’t know how to tell you and I didn’t want you to not want to kiss me for any reason.” He glanced up again. “I…” A sigh. “In Chicago we were together, but then he left and it was just Rey and I and Pilot. I didn’t know if you’d...if you’d be interested.” And he hadn’t wanted to say anything if he wasn’t going to be. “I’ve done a lot more than kissing. I just wanted to make sure that if you kissed me it was because you wanted to kiss me and not because I told you that we’d kissed before and you thought you should.” Poe leaned forward and pressed his lips to Finn's again, just because he felt like at this particular moment he more than had permission. And he was trying not to think about the fact that he could have done that for a lot longer, instead he just savored the fact that he could right now. That maybe, maybe when Finn was talking about having the right person to take his shirt off for, that he might be talking about Poe. "Yeah, well, I want to kiss you," he grinned, as he pulled back. "I've wanted to for a long time." Poe was basically the only person that Finn wanted to take his shirt off for. So he would just keep it as something for Poe only. If he decided later that he didn’t mind taking his shirt off around other people, then he’d go with it, but he was pretty sure that that wasn’t going to be right now. But he could worry about that later because right now there was kissing involved and he just wanted to keep kissing. “I might have noticed,” he replied, amusement evident in his voice. “I’m glad, though. I guess I would have been okay if you didn’t want to kiss me, but I really prefer you wanting to kiss me.” He reached up to run his fingers through Poe’s hair. “I was pretty sure I was going to have to kiss you first, though. I almost did.” "You should have," Poe grinned back, his leg moving forward just a little. It wasn't that they could get that much closer, but he was still going to try. He just wanted to keep Finn's fingers in his hair for a lot longer. "Clearly I wasn't picking up on signals." Which wasn't entirely true, it had just taken him a bit to realize there were signals to pick up on. He'd been so focused on not interrupting anything that Finn and Rey might have, that he hadn't been looking, or paying attention. "We could go back to my room if you want," he suggested. "I mean, we don't have to, but if you want to? You could take my shirt off again," he raised his eyebrows with a wicked grin. “You weren’t. It was painful how obvious I felt I was being.” Finn stared for a moment, the world feeling like it had slowed down all over again. Now that things had started, they were moving forward and Finn had to recenter himself. He’d already done this before, so it wasn’t like he didn’t know what to do. He just didn’t want Poe to feel obligated. Only he knew that Poe wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t what he wanted. He let out a somewhat shaky breath that he hadn’t realized he’d been holding until he let it out. “Yeah, we could do that.” He cleared his throat. He tried not to think too much about Poe with his shirt off. “I’ll let you take mine off.” |