| Mar. 27th, 2008 @ 06:39 pm Arachne - Chapter 5 |
|---|
Disclaimer: Nothing you recognise belongs to me. Just borrowed. Will be returned. Snape is welcome to stay, though.
My beta readers, Maggie and Melusin, deserve much thanks and the highest praise, a lot of chocolate, flowers and relaxing music. All remaining errors are my fault.
Realising and accepting my feelings didn't make my life as your pet spider any easier. While I craved the close contact with you, it was very frustrating at the same time. What chance of winning your affection did I have as a spider? And did I want to win your younger self's affection at all, knowing that I would have to leave again soon? Would the feelings I thought I had for the complete version of you – the mixture of younger and older Severus – would that feeling change when I came back and met the older version of you again, hopefully on the way to recovery? Would you even remember me? And how would you react to that loathsome know-it-all, that thorn in your side, being in love with you? Would you reject me? Would you despise me? Would you be able to forgive me for invading your privacy as Arachne the spider? I didn't have the answers to these questions; all I knew was that I wouldn't want to give up my hopes, that I would want to explore these feelings with you, the older version, because you are the complete Severus Snape, the result of the many different Snapes of your past. And yet, I felt that this was unfair to your younger self; that your younger self had a right to be seen individually, to be treated as an independent entity. I was very confused. ( Read more... ) |
![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
