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drachenmina ([info]drachenmina) wrote in [info]phoenix_flies,
@ 2008-03-14 10:20:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
A Most Impractical Cat (Severus Snape/Harry Potter, NC17)
Title: A Most Impractical Cat
Author: [info]drachenmina
Prompt: #3, Bellatrix finds a kitten in the back garden. She just doesn't know that it's Harry Potter in his Animagus form.
Pairing: Severus Snape/Harry Potter, Lucius/Narcissa, Bellatrix Lestrange/various, Ron/Hermione, Draco/Hermione (unrequited – at least as yet!)
Rating: NC17
Word Count: 12,400
Summary: AU. During the horcrux hunt, Harry goes to Malfoy Manor in his guise as a cat to try and find Helga Hufflepuff’s cup. Things do not go according to plan.
Warnings: Mention of het, (very) mild BDSM, bestiality and the poetry of TS Eliot.
Author's Note: AN: I’m sure it didn’t start out quite this cracky…
Huge thanks for the beta go to the wonderful [info]gin_tonic


Here, kitty...

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[info]who_la_hoop
2008-03-22 03:28 pm UTC (link)
Hee! That was very enjoyable, hon. I loved your light-hearted, irreverent tone - I laughed out loud at parts (Hermione's cow animagus! Nagini fancying the Harry-cat!) - and I enjoyed the fanon references. The Snape/Harry interactions were both touching and amusing. A really fun read!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 10:38 pm UTC

[info]torino10154
2008-03-22 03:43 pm UTC (link)
I loved this! Nothing like the deranged sexual practices of Death Eaters to lighten the mood. Of course, the interaction between Harry and Snape was delightful. Great job!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 10:39 pm UTC

[info]red_day_dawning
2008-03-22 03:45 pm UTC (link)
Oh, that was wonderful & romantic & sweet & hilariously funny - I nearly did the hot-chocolate-across-the-monitor-snort when I read: "In that case, you may explain to me why there is a deceased rodent on my carpet."
Harry coloured. When he'd been a cat, bringing Snape a present of a dead mouse had seemed perfectly natural, but it was making a lot less sense now. "Um, staying in character?" he hazarded. He changed the subject hurriedly. - brilliantly funny!

Such an entertaining read - really well done!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 10:40 pm UTC

[info]duniazade
2008-03-22 03:48 pm UTC (link)
It's delightful! I loved the light-hearted tone, the fizzy humour, the characterisations. I giggled all along, but Hermione as a brown cow made me crack up. It was a pleasure - thank you!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 10:42 pm UTC

[info]severed_lies
2008-03-22 03:49 pm UTC (link)
There are too many great lines to quote, so I shall just say that this is brilliant, and not what I had expected at all. I love how easily Severus gives in to his desires. Hermione and Ron's animagus forms are hysterical and appreciated as they usually always end up with fairly useful forms. Again, just pure brilliance.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 10:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]severed_lies, 2008-03-23 02:12 am UTC

[info]gingertart50
2008-03-22 04:31 pm UTC (link)
This is absolutely, completely, utterly bloody wonderful. Gloriously irreverant, hilariously funny, sweet and touching, romantic and sensual, I loved every line - too many really good ones to quote. Although I think I need brain-bleach to remove the picture of Nagini and Bellatrix with Voldemort...

I'm adding this to my list of fic recs. I loved it!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 10:45 pm UTC

[info]majmunka
2008-03-22 05:24 pm UTC (link)
Oh, Hon, your style is priceless. So wonderfully funny! I enjoyed every single words. A perfect mix of cute, sad, silly and serious moments. Brilliant. I'm still waiting for the moment when Draco'll realize he wanked in front of Harry :D

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 11:11 pm UTC

[info]zephre
2008-03-22 06:21 pm UTC (link)
Brilliant and hilarious! And touching as well, what a great way to twist events. I just loved it. :)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 11:12 pm UTC

[info]beautyfulevil
2008-03-22 07:01 pm UTC (link)
Such a brilliant response to the prompt! I loved it. Some of Harry's cat comments were perfect. It made me giggle in parts and that's just what I needed.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 11:13 pm UTC

[info]themadscriptor
2008-03-22 07:21 pm UTC (link)
This was uproarious and utterly delightful. :)

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 11:14 pm UTC

[info]blpaintchart
2008-03-22 10:44 pm UTC (link)
Woohoo!

Well, Look at you, gone feature-length!
Drachenmina? Yes, I remember her when she was just the drabblemistress. *sighs*

I can't imagine a more distinguished first attempt at a fest, darlin'! You got me absorbed in over 12000 words of a pairing I don't hold with.
Look at your cute kitty!Potter and your hilarious fishy!Ron (poor sod) and sweet little Draco, and I haven't even started on your Snape dialogue. Suffice to quote "Deceased rodent?"

Great stuff, bloody well done! &hearts

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-22 11:22 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]blpaintchart, 2008-03-22 11:48 pm UTC

[info]cluegirl
2008-03-22 11:15 pm UTC (link)
This is better than catnip with a warm cream chaser!

Nagini the skank made me crack right up!
Well done!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:38 pm UTC

[info]fbowden
2008-03-22 11:25 pm UTC (link)
Oh my god.. I'm only about 200 words in and already I'm on the floor with tears rolling down my cheeks.. Harry about to be neutered in animagus form.. BWAHAHA!! *runs off the read the rest*

(Reply to this)


[info]fbowden
2008-03-23 12:10 am UTC (link)
Well, where on earth do I start? This is quite possibly the funniest thing i have read in a very, very long time. Practically every other line had me laughing out loud and at some points, I could barely catch breath.

Just everything about it; cute kitten Harry, cow Hermione and fish Ron were hilarious. harry's split cat personality with all the names, the hideous sexual goings on at the Manor, so much, so good, so brilliant.
Your Snape dialogue was perfect, and all of Harry's cat antics..priceless.

Snape and his deceased rodent.. BWAHAHA...

Love you to bits

xxx

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:41 pm UTC

[info]night_childe25
2008-03-23 12:58 am UTC (link)
I just loved it. I laughed my ass off at Harry's reaction to seeing Nagini with Bella. The interaction between Harry and Snape was great. Thanks for sharing.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:42 pm UTC

[info]sweetmelodykiss
2008-03-23 04:10 am UTC (link)
Oh, that was wonderful. I absolutely loved it. Fabulous work!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:43 pm UTC

[info]lilyseyes
2008-03-23 09:14 am UTC (link)
LMAO! Brilliant...just bloody brilliant!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:43 pm UTC
Wonderful!
(Anonymous)
2008-03-23 01:06 pm UTC (link)
This story was absolutely lovely! The humour was so well done, and the characters real.
One tiny comment, and I may have misunderstood - just before the epilogue, did Harry not leave his collar in the room as a calling-card because he couldn't put it back on? A few sentences later he alohamora's it off as he leaves the property. But I may have entirely got the wrong end of the stick.
Thank you for a delightful read.
Philo

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: Wonderful! - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-23 01:33 pm UTC
Re: Wonderful! - (Anonymous), 2008-03-23 02:30 pm UTC

[info]apythia
2008-03-23 03:47 pm UTC (link)
What a great story! I love how Snape and Draco both took to the cat. Though my favorite was Harry's reaction to Nagani. That was perfect! What a well done and creative story!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:56 pm UTC
\o/
[info]lilibel
2008-03-23 05:33 pm UTC (link)
This, my dear, was sheer genius.
I absolutly loved it, had to stop drinking my tea from time to time in order to save my keyboard for the hot liquid and just loved how you treated all that.

Thanks a lot for having done such a delicious thing with my prompt.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

Re: \o/ - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:57 pm UTC

[info]daughter_moon
2008-03-23 11:05 pm UTC (link)
That was brilliant. It's been rec'd all over the place so I knew it had to be good but wow! So funny and so cute and so Snape. Well done.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 12:59 pm UTC

[info]auctasinistra
2008-03-24 03:51 am UTC (link)
This was absolutely delightful! Thank you for sharing it.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 07:47 pm UTC

[info]slashpine
2008-03-24 06:51 am UTC (link)
Mmm, this was pure catnip for a Snarry humor fan! A very IC Snape and funny cat-Harry, along with an outrageous large cast of crack-ish other characters.

Your kinky pairings were so funny, although like Harry, I hope Hermione or someone can scrub out obliviate the memory of Narcissa pegging Lucius, and Voldie/Nagini/Bellatrix. Good thing we didn't see Bellatrix's 3some, too. *winces*

Love the Trio's animagus forms! And Draco's crush on Hermione - hee!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 07:56 pm UTC

[info]gryffindorj
2008-03-24 07:42 pm UTC (link)
You've heard it a lot but it's worth saying again that was so brilliant! You must have a cat because the details about Harry eating grass then puking, bringing Snape a tribute, or nudging fingers with his nose are perfectly catish. Your details were so funny or sweet. I loved that Draco loves Hermione and wanks to her. I love crazy Bellatrix or snotty Lucius. Above all I love Snape and every part he is in this. This was just priceless. DH would have been much better if this had been the story line! I adored the epilogue. Well done!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-24 07:59 pm UTC

[info]oni_butterfly
2008-03-26 09:54 am UTC (link)
Absolutely amazing! Just the details you went into with the happenings at DeathEater HQ and the life of a cat was amazing. Crazy Ol' Bella was hillarious, and poor little Draco! Ah! Just so amazing!

(Reply to this) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]drachenmina, 2008-03-27 04:40 pm UTC

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