shadowcatsmeow (shadowcatsmeow) wrote in oh_marvelous, @ 2015-06-15 17:46:00 |
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Entry tags: | z: om1: !afterearth, z: om1: !complete, z: om1: character: jasper sitwell, z: om1: character: kitty pryde, z: om1: location: dyson sphere, z: om1: location: shield headquarters |
Yeah, I think I might break
Characters: Kitty, Jasper
Setting: SHIELD HQ
Content: Sad Kitty
Summary: Kitty breaks down on the job, Jasper's a good therapist
Kitty woke up with a heavy heart, as if anxiety hopped on and began to gnaw away at it. She made it to SHIELD okay, if only with a dull, burdening ache that made every step and smiley "Good morning!" feel like work. Hard work. At least there was coffee, a cup might be enough to make up for the bad and restless night before, and ease the pain in her chest. Make that two. On her tablet, Kitty reviewed the requests, which included implementing a proper, more efficient, messaging system for the office and, more ambitious, interfacing SHIELD's systems with the Sphere's holographic technology. It would be a long day, but that was fine, Kitty needed this; to break things down and put them back together again, to think about the mechanics of every code, chip and wire, and nothing else. That was easy, she could do that. Kitty made herself at home in one of the operation rooms and went around, checking out each computer lined up at the base and taking notes before looking through her tablet again for the blueprints and schematics. It was sometime before Kitty went in hands-on, and for a moment, as she began dissecting, she was sure she'd be okay. Until she wasn't.
Crap. Kitty jerked back as sparks cackled and watched her holographic interface flicker then completely die. She stared incredulously, arms open for an explanation. All she got was an answer full of electrical spit. "Safe mode, run diagnostics and initiate system backup," she commanded, peering inside the chunk of the panel she'd dissected. Wire entrails spilled out as she carefully rummaged through the inside and pulled out burnt cables. A small, faded screen then popped up on the left of her and Kitty looked up to read it. 15% system circuits have been polarized. Cause unknown. Frowning, Kitty skimmed the rest of the diagnosis, heart in her throat. That was nothing, that could be fixed, no damage, it was okay, it could be fixed, she had it all under control. This was science, algorithms and hardwire circuits that all served a purpose, absolutes. If a function was lost, she could find it. A broken wire? She could put it together again. This knowledge used to comfort her, a sort of meditation when she needed to get out of her head, away from reality.
But all she could see now were her failures coiled around those wires, her crumbling life in broken codes and glitchy holographs. Kitty tinkered, fingers trembling around her tools as tears weld up in her eyes. She couldn't save her goddaughter. Or Rogue. She couldn't even keep her students together, safe. Or the X-Men, for that matter. Wicked was grieving, there was nothing she could do about that. There was nothing she could do. But be there, and try to mend her broken world with scraps. Kitty dropped her hand and clutched her chest, gasping for air, just breathe, Pryde, and crawled away from her work to get to her feet, barely making it to the door before she broke down in uncontrollable sobs.