InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I'm the man."

Zelgadis Greywars (_incurable) wrote in marinasylum,
@ 2012-06-12 13:21:00

Entry tags:

:action, kitty pryde (aoa), tear grants, yomi isayama, zelgadis greywars

[Action | Open] Later afternoon
[To say it's been a difficult few days doesn't come close to covering it. You'd think he'd be rejoicing having his bed to himself again, but all it does is remind him of how epically stupid he acted toward Lina and Saber both. And when Saber came home wearing that damn collar it was the final straw. The conversation had been abrupt, her explanation dulling his initial shock and anger into an ache of resentment that compounded the one he was still nursing.]

[So he'd taken his sword and left. Now he's in the Athletic Complex, the ~~lightsaber~~ Sword of Light activated to make a blade of pure, white light. Zelgadis focuses his power; the limitations on the sword make it difficult, but nonetheless he takes a swing and manages to send a ball of white-hot fire into one of the dummies he'd set up.]

[He's careful to watch out for people, so anyone who comes to see why there's lightning visible over the athletic complex won't get in his line of fire.]

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	kitty_has_claws 2012-06-20 04:31 am UTC (link)
	Maybe it's a bad idea, but that doesn't mean you're the reason it's a bad idea. If you are then she's an idiot, and you should stop worrying about it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

_incurable
2012-06-20 12:21 pm UTC (link)

You always make things sound so easy. 'Get close to people.' 'If they don't react well when you do, forget them.'

[sighing, he's not mad a her, just... generally miserable.] This is why I promised myself I'd never be with anyone like that until I was human. At least then I'd -- [he doesn't even know. Be able to handle it? Know that, at least, it wasn't about his skin?]

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

I hope I'm not ruining their future conversation. /sob

kitty_has_claws
2012-06-20 09:15 pm UTC (link)

Making hard things sound easy is kind of my gift.

But this thing you're doing where you're putting all the blame on the stone is not okay. People have problems no matter what. Stone. Flesh. Steel. Feathers. No matter what we are on the outside we're all a mess on the inside. [THIS IS YOUR PEP TALK!] I don't know your servant well, but I'm still betting this thing is her issue and not yours. Stop being so self involved.

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	Nope! _incurable 2012-06-20 10:00 pm UTC (link)
	[He blinks at her, but that's as startled as he gets. And then a dry chuckle.] It's hard not to be self-involved when you're alone. I haven't been called "heartless" for nothing. So for all I know you're right about everything... except her being my servant. So don't call her that, because the last thing I need is her getting the idea I'm for that nonsense. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Good! kitty_has_claws 2012-06-24 04:11 pm UTC (link)
	Heartless I don't buy. [She has a feeling it's soft and no amount of stone skin really protects it. Okay, she might be thinking of someone else here too.] I can stop calling her your servant if you work on this "everything is my skin's fault" thing. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_incurable 2012-06-24 07:56 pm UTC (link)
	[He looks fairly exasperated -- and somewhat annoyed, but not so much that it's anything like anger.] Do you have some vested interest in getting me to somehow accept my skin? [Because he hates to break it to you, but that's not possible.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

kitty_has_claws
2012-06-24 08:23 pm UTC (link)

[There are plenty of reasons for it. Back when she first learned what she was she was afraid of mutants. Afraid of herself. The world was going downhill fast and dirty and mutants were the reason. That's what everyone said. Her parents died because of mutants. Because of her. She had a lot of reasons to hate what she was back then. Even once the X-Men took her in she found herself shying away from the ones who looked different. Piotr could still change back then. Things might have been different if he'd always been steel. And while things could definitely use some different, she couldn't bring herself to regret being with him. There's something to be said for giving other people a chance and something to be said for giving yourself a chance. Zelgadis isn't a mutant, but he's someone she can relate to, so if she can say anything to help then...she should.]

Shouldn't you be the one with the interest in it? Is it really better to go around assuming all bad things are because of it? [Love the skin you're in!]

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_incurable
2012-06-24 08:36 pm UTC (link)

It would be better to cure it. [Haven't they been over this?] It wasn't fate or nature that got me this way, it was my own naivete in believing in someone who betrayed me. And then after he experimented on me for no reason than his own ambition, he used me to try and bring great evil to the world.

Plenty bad has come of my being like this. I don't see how I'm supposed to see a bright side, or why I should even bother. I don't want to accept this, I want to be rid of it.

[He was never really angry much at all, but what little there was drains away as he asks earnestly,] Is that so wrong?

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	kitty_has_claws 2012-06-24 08:43 pm UTC (link)
	Fine. Change it if you can. I just don't think you should put your life on hold while you look for a way to do that. You'll miss out on too much, and time isn't something we always get a lot of. [Granted, she get a reprieve from dying at 19 by being here, but the point stands.] If you can play the hand you're dealt at least you're still in the game. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_incurable 2012-06-24 08:59 pm UTC (link)
	You keep implying that this is what I've been given by life, but it wasn't. This was done to me by an evil person. [although just how evil exactly Rezo was...] And I know firsthand that you're not above revenge against someone who wronged you. [a certain fire ringing any bells?] All I want to do is make things right again. I can't imagine anything more important. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2012-06-24 09:17 pm UTC (link)
	Given. Forced. Gift. Curse. PoTAEto. PoTAHto. I'm not saying don't get revenge. [Because, yeah, definitely I'm not even saying don't look for a way back, but if that's all you do then that evil person wins. All you are is a creation of that evil. Listen, whatever. You'll do what you want. It's up to you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

_incurable
2012-06-25 02:27 am UTC (link)

Well it's not like I'm much better at doing things your way. [A bit of a sigh; he's sick of defending this. And despite her dismissive 'whatever' he doesn't see how he should feel anything but defensive.] Neither of the closest people I have want anything to do with me.

I used to be just like how you seem to want me to be. But after my skin changed I couldn't be the same person because no one treated me like the same person -- or even a person at all. [Until Lina, and with a few scattered exceptions.] So maybe I'm not a good person anymore and maybe I don't trust people, but it's like no one even tries to understand that I didn't have a choice if I wanted to survive.

And everyone wants me to just -- just change? It's the same thing as when people would run from me because they thought I was a monster, only instead of my skin they're judging the rest of me.

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kitty_has_claws
2012-07-13 02:45 am UTC (link)

[She sighs because...she gets a lot of that. She does. Being a mutant isn't a choice either. She didn't want it at first or for awhile, and even though she didn't feel like she'd changed the way the world treated her had in an instant, and there was no going back. There was only hiding it as best she could or flaunting it so people showed their true colors up front.]

You don't seem happy, Zel. That's why people want you to change. Not because you don't fit whatever standard we have in mind. Because it doesn't seem like you're okay with what's going on now.

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	_incurable 2012-07-13 04:20 am UTC (link)
	[He thinks about that, mainly because it was Kitty who said it. Anyone else would be up to their ears in denials and brush-offs.] Then let me find happiness in my own way. If there truly is no cure for me, I guess... I'll have to come to terms with that. But I'm not ready. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2012-07-14 03:24 am UTC (link)
	That sounds fair. [And it does. She can't argue with that, and she appreciates it.] So... In the meantime, is there anything I can do? [Since your life sucks in the here and now and all.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_incurable 2012-07-15 10:31 pm UTC (link)
	[Hey, a truce! Excellent. He smiles at her, more genuinely now.] Thanks, but I'll find a way to manage. I'm just more used to getting fireballed when a woman gets ticked off at me, I guess. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2012-07-18 12:30 am UTC (link)
	Next time I'm ticked off I'll do my best to get a flame thrower. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_incurable 2012-07-20 05:01 pm UTC (link)
	I don't think anyone in their right mind is giving you implements of fire anytime soon. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2012-07-22 10:17 pm UTC (link)
	Ouch. Nice people pull their punches a little you know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	_incurable 2012-07-23 10:50 pm UTC (link)
	So I've heard. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2012-07-25 05:26 pm UTC (link)
	Mmhmm. [Smiling. She does enjoy Zelgadis.] Okay, well, I have important things to do [unlike this!] so I'll see you around. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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