InsaneJournal

Sephiroth glared at the foppish Director. “Pull the other one.”

Lazard smiled thinly. “This isn’t a joke, General.”

“All three of us?” Angeal growled, while Genesis blurted, “Just the three of us?”

“You are our public face, gentlemen. Besides, it’s for charity.”

“Bloody hell,” Sephiroth snarled, turning to go. “Let’s get this over with, then.”

The other two caught up with him in the hallway. “It could be worse,” Genesis offered. “At least there won’t be any other SOLDIERs in on the project.”

“No,” Sephiroth muttered, “they’ll be bidding.”

“It is for a good cause, Sephir,” Angeal pointed out. “Besides, we’re in it together – how bad can it be?”

* * * * *

“I am NOT wearing THAT!” Genesis threw the offending garment back at the dressing room attendant. “I thought, when he said ‘drag,’ he meant…well, drag, dammit! Not this…this…frumpy…”

“There’s high camp drag, and then there’s low, Geni,” Angeal’s voice came from the next dressing room over.

Genesis stared at the wall between them. “How in the HELLS do you know that?”

He could almost hear Angeal’s shrug. “Talk radio.”

From still another dressing room, Sephiroth’s voice growled like thunder. “I am not letting you fuck with my hair.”

Genesis considered that maybe he didn’t have it quite so bad after all: at least they weren’t making him wear a wig or anything. He heaved a sigh, then held out his hand to the attendant. “Give it here.”

* * * * *

Genesis was the first of the three to venture out of his dressing room. He walked easily in high plastic heels, though he really wished he could rip the feathers off the damn things – but then, they did sort of complete the outfit.

When he heard another door open nearby, he had to fight down the urge to bolt. It wasn’t an outside door, so it could only be one of his unfortunate companions, and quite frankly, he was dying to see what those two had to wear. He smoothed the velour housecoat down over his hips and turned.

With a lopsided smile, Angeal strode toward him, mules clattering ominously across the tiles.

Genesis gaped. “You didn’t shave?”

“Not by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin! Or legs,” he added with an awkward glance downward. Considering that most SOLDIERs had only enough body hair to not look like a high-paid male escort, Angeal’s legs looked startlingly feral.

Genesis burst out laughing. “You, sir, are a disgrace to women the world over!” To emphasize his words, he flipped his feather boa dramatically back over his shoulder.

“You know, when Lazard said we’d be wearing women’s clothing for this charity auction, I thought he meant something a little more flashy,” Angeal confessed, fidgeting with his Hello, Moogie nightshirt. “Still, it is rather comfortable, if a bit…short.”

“Sephiroth!” Genesis called toward the last closed door. “Aren’t you done yet? We go on in five minutes!”

A low grumble answered him. “I’m hoping I spontaneously combust before that time comes.”

Angeal planted his fists on his hips and addressed the door. “There’s no way it’s worse than ours, Sephir. Get out here so we can get this done with!”

“You laugh, you die,” Sephiroth warned, his tone not joking in the least. He opened his door.

Genesis clamped a hand over his mouth and turned away, eyes watering with choked-off laughter.

Angeal covered his own brief lapse with a coughing fit.

Sephiroth leaned sulkily against the wall, causing his sun dress to ride up alarmingly. “Fine. Get it out of your systems, the both of you. ‘How bad can it be?’ Is this bad enough for you?”

“That’s…a new…look for you…that’s for…damn sure,” Angeal managed to gasp out between coughs.

“Pigtails!” Genesis howled, breaking down and laughing till he almost knocked himself off his heels. “Oh, priceless!”

The outer door opened, and Lazard applauded as he entered the room. “Well done, gentlemen! Now, get out on that stage and earn some gil!”

Angeal frowned. “Earn?”

* * * * *

“Good thing you can sing,” Sephiroth said as he tossed first one spangle-bedecked kitten-heel into the bin, then the other.

Angeal shrugged humbly. “No big deal, I like singing. Can you give me a hand with this shirt? It’s kind of stuck around my ears…”

Genesis peeled off the housecoat and tossed it in with the other garments. “At least we managed to raise some money, though if I ever have to dance in women’s shoes again I am SO ripping off the damn feathers first. Do you think we’re ever going to live this down, guys?”

Sephiroth smirked. “There’s no record of it, right? Only people’s memories and word-of-mouth. They’ll remember that we made fools of ourselves for a good cause, and that will be the end of it.”

* * * * *

“Hey, when did we get these?”

Zack grinned at the trooper. “Friend of mine had a camera at this charity event, and, well, it’s for a good cause. Now, two gil, if you please!” He made another hash-mark on his inventory list, then hefted the stack of “1^st Class Divine” calendars and addressed the crowd. “Who’s in?”