They were questions he hadn't really wanted to answer because he didn't know how to answer them. The whole day was a blur in Tobias's head, except for the look on Simms's face, the way life drained from his eyes and how the blood felt on Tobias's hands while he tried to staunch the bleeding. That was clear as day in his memory. Tobias grimaced as if in pain for a moment and he shifted in the snow. He could see snowflakes falling in front of him, but Juno's face was clearer. For a moment, he wondered if she resented him for killing Simms. She was probably more justified... even Chase, or Cecilia. Were they angry that they hadn't been the ones to do it? He could have probably understood before, but now... he couldn't comprehend it. Maybe because he'd done it, and it hadn't been satisfying. Not to him.
"I had to," Tobias explained after a moment. He had to pause and clear his throat to continue. "He was going to poison the lunches. Random people, not everyone. But... I wouldn't help him. So he got angry and tried to force my face into the sink where he'd dumped meat he'd soaked in Drano." He could still smell it almost as clearly as the blood. The chemicals had burned his nostrils. "I think I just snapped. I knew the people watching wouldn't stop him. They didn't stop me." Tobias licked his lips again. His entire body felt uncomfortably tense. He wasn't sure if it was from the conversation or the cold. "They didn't try to help."
Her last question as harder to answer and Tobias reached up to rub at his brow. "I don't think I deserve it either. But I had to do it, 'cause no one else could and if I didn't, people might be dead now. And I'd rather live with watching him die than knowing I helped kill people I actually care about."