"Because there's a little nagging voice in my head insisting that if I really loved you, I'd put a stop to this. That I'm selfish and foolish and I don't know what I'm capable of. But I don't know that I'm strong enough to listen to it." That was the simplest answer she could give him. Perhaps not a pretty one, or even a terribly rational one, but, well... she had warned him about the baggage.
Cecilia kept tracing lines on the back of his hand, watching the path of her thumb. "There's another one, though. Bits of that stupid, silly girl I used to be, when I believed there was good in everyone and loved so easily. That part just wants to jump in headfirst. I didn't think anything was left of that girl. I thought he killed her. I..." Cecilia frowned again, pausing long enough to chew her lip and think very hard about what to say. How she felt. Finally she sighed in something like defeat, but when she spoke her voice was lighter. "I'm so happy," she said, looking up at him now. "And I know how dangerous that can be."