alright i'm gonna try the truth here and i'm gonna pour out my fucking soul, and that'll be that.
i'm gone.it wasn't for any of you. i didn't think they'd make it public. i wanted to keep in my room just in case
[...] it got too hard. no great loss. it was just in case. it was just for me. and it was for them if the threat got actually real, like, 'can be shot' real. whichever came first. i wouldn't use it on you. i should've known better.
anyway now that it's public i guess it's up to y'all. i guess i could appeal to the thing about defense for any who need it eventually, ideally, but that's a load of bullshit even i don't believe in. that wasn't the point and it won't work. don't do it.
fuck i just wanted to have the option to go out on my own terms. wouldn't you?
that's it. vote, or whatever. i'm fucked either way.