I was engaged. His name was Piotr and I’d known him since I was fourteen. It was the day of the wedding when it hit me that we weren’t right together. We’d been together on and off since I was fourteen and he was nineteen and I thought he was the love of my life. But things had gotten so messed up over the years and it didn’t matter how much I loved him. It just wasn’t healthy any more. I had a bunch of relationships like that. Just not good.
And now there’s this guy and he’s really great and I really like him a lot. He seems really great. But I just...feel like there’s something wrong and I wonder if maybe I’m letting my feelings get the best of me again. I wasn’t in a good place back home and I’m wondering if maybe I’m trying to use this to make up for other things.