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Illya Kuryakin (
illyakuryakin
) wrote in
wtnvgame
,
@
2021
-
04
-
24
12:41:00
Illya & Napoleon: Knock Knock
#TEXTMESSAGES
ILLYA
Did you get one of those eggs?
NAPOLEON
No, thank god.
I am most certainly not playing caregiver to a creature that may or may not violate my suits.
The desert is bad enough.
ILLYA
I find it strange, after being here as long as we have, people brought those eggs into their homes
NAPOLEON
Some people have more heart than sense, I guess.
Although even then, I wonder.
ILLYA
more heart than sense is easy
when the bar is that low
NAPOLEON
Well it's not as if you had a high opinion anyway.
Most of these people seem American in nature at the very least.
ILLYA
it's no wonder that American is a failed state
NAPOLEON
I know.
We're just so terrible a people.
Should scrap the lot.
ILLYA
You could always emigrate somewhere better and denounce your citizenship, you know
there might be some hope for you
NAPOLEON
I think that's called felony evasion and might be difficult.
Although I dare say I could convince Waverly to extend something.
ILLYA
I'm sure you could if you were so inclined
NAPOLEON
That's if we ever end up back there.
Still an if.
ILLYA
I'm confident it will happen, if only because I don't understand what the point of keeping us here is
NAPOLEON
Apparently there's a lot of weird, science fiction creep reasons.
Definitely hoping those don't crop up sometime soon.
ILLYA
fingers crossed
at least the cold war was normal
NAPOLEON
Perfectly clear what was going on there.
Very little iffy gray areas to navigate.
Although I definitely like the food more here.
ILLYA
again
low bar
NAPOLEON
Well that's mostly just for you.
Because you don't know how to indulge.
ILLYA
I don't want to be wasteful
NAPOLEON
So don't waste it?
No one is talking about having a buffet you know.
ILLYA
there is always waste with indulgence
not always the food on table
but the labor that's not fairly compensated
with no ethical consumption under a capitalist regime
there is no option beyond consuming the minimum
NAPOLEON
You're giving me a headache.
Like really, you just turn everything into a reason to barely be alive
ruining things.
ILLYA
capitalism isn't my fault
NAPOLEON
Boredom might be.
ILLYA
I just wish the people did more with others in mind
instead of only themselves
NAPOLEON
Isn't that more a hedonistic issue than a capitalistic one?
ILLYA
I don't think individualism is inherently hedonistic
Just the idea that a person can take what they want because they deserve it
without thinking of larger social responsibilities
NAPOLEON
That's definitely an American disease.
But we are taught that from our earliest.
Supposedly we deserve whatever we want.
But then they put us in jail for getting it.
ILLYA
and poverty is the fault of the poor. Not the system that abandoned them
it is tragic
I know that in the USSR there were mistakes made and people in power liked their power more than convictions and promises but
I like idea of social responsibility, of community and giving back to help one another
I like this better than greed
NAPOLEON
Socialism is a bad word in America.
Pretty sure I'd get arrested for that too.
ILLYA
everyone is so concerned with their own rights in America
that they don't mind stepping on other people's
NAPOLEON
It does seem to just get worse.
Apparently, we're so concerned with our rights we don't care about lives either.
ILLYA
now instead of being boring I've depressed you
NAPOLEON
You've certainly brought the tone down significantly.
ILLYA
sorry
NAPOLEON
At least get some vodka bring your dumb face here and let me be depressed and drunk at you.
ILLYA
you know
sharing vodka is socialism
NAPOLEON
I'm already serving a 10 year sentence, what will they do
Add another 10 years?
ILLYA
And that won't matter
You only have about five good years left
NAPOLEON
Wow
Harsh
Are you trying to make me a storm cloud of woe?
ILLYA
I am joking!
NAPOLEON
You're very bad at it Peril.
ILLYA
this I admit is true
NAPOLEON
You either need to work on it, or stop trying.
ILLYA
...
...
...
knock knock
NAPOLEON
Good lord
who is there?
ILLYA
a little old lady
NAPOLEON
...
A little old lady who?
ILLYA
I had no idea you could yodel
NAPOLEON
That is absolutely terrible, Peril.
Put the joke book away.
ILLYA
NAPOLEON
Your communism is wasted in desert land, America you know.
You should just give in.
Come to the dark side. All that nonsense.
ILLYA
I will bring you vodka and we will talk of other things
like chicken
NAPOLEON
Hopeful not crossing roads.
And good vodka.
ILLYA
well. I can grant one of those wishes
NAPOLEON
I mean if it's just one,
I'll take the vodka.
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