About six months after we set up camp, one of our people got taken. Girl named Annie. Sweetest thing you could have ever meet ended up with a one of Lucifer's inner sanctum riding shotgun in her meatsuit. It alluded to the fact that she was broken and wouldn't survive, so I made the decision that getting whatever information out of it that I could was more important than Annie.
It took four days before I killed the thing in her skin.
After, I was just wrecked. That was the first after Alastair. Cas found me three bottles into a black-out evening. I don't remember much about that first night, but... the second, the third, so on? Only halfway decent nights I had in that shithole.