InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "eat the meat"

adrian pucey (greenauror) wrote in wished,
@ 2009-08-05 09:08:00

Entry tags:

!1997: 08, !incomplete, adrian pucey, alicia spinnet

Who: Adrian Pucey and Alicia Spinnet
What: Talking. An explanation for this.
Where: TBD when Lena talks to Steph. :P
When: Shortly after this exchange.
Rating: PG? Unless there's language.

To say that Adrian was confused would be a little bit of an understatement. Confused didn't really begin to touch on how he felt at the moment - from Ali's flipping out the other morning to her refusal to have inner to random scribbles in her journal. He should have put two and two together by now and might have it it was anyone else involved, but it was hard for him to see straight when it came to her.

She'd asked him to meet her and of course he had readily agreed. Apart from his curiosity, he wanted to see her. His attempts to ask her for drinks or to dinner should have made that apparent. Maybe he was naive to hold any hope at rekindling what they'd one had, but it was obviously still there for them. The other night had proved that, despite the way she'd reacted the next morning. He didn't know why she was pushing him away, but he wasn't about to let her do it a second time. He'd grown up a bit in the last two years, grown more sure of what he wanted, and having Ali in his life again was at the top of that list. Now that he'd bumped into her, he didn't intend to just let her walk out of his life again.

Hands ran anxiously through his hair as he waited. Whatever she had to speak to him about, it sounded serious and he was inexplicably nervous. He wished she'd arrive already.

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spinswildly
2009-08-05 07:58 pm UTC (link)

To say Alicia was nervous would be massive understatement. From the moment she'd put away her journal she'd been jittery, a nervous wreck as her mother puttered around her, leaving her to her squirmy nerves. The journal had come out once to see what Fred and George would do in the matter; she would have asked Katie or Angie but men rarely did what you expected. Alicia was bracing herself for screaming, lots of anger, swearing. She was expecting it and she wouldn't hold that against Adrian at all.

Finally, at about half four, her mother had grown tired of her accidentally beheading perfectly good flowers and ushered her out of the shop so she could go and get changed. It took her much of the half an hour to finally settle on an outfit. She wanted to look nice (she was ignoring the fact that this was because it was Adrian) without looking like she'd made an effort. It took her all of a second to apperate to Diagon Alley and for the short walk over she gave herself a little pep talk. You can do this, if he screams don't punch him, you can do this.

For a moment she watched him, foot tapping anxiously as she tried to force herself to walk over. Gryffindor. Oh, yes, but apparently when facing Adrian and something he would likely hate her for all of that bravery fled the scene and she was left worried and scared.

"Hey," she greeted lightly, having finally forced herself to walk up to him. "Thanks for coming and meeting me. There's some benches around here," Alicia told him, nodding in the appropriate direction and leading them toward it. It was a nice spot, quiet but not too quiet, public enough so he'd hopefully feel bad screaming but not too public everyone would be staring at them.

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greenauror
2009-08-06 01:39 am UTC (link)

Adrian shook his head to ward off her thanks. "It's not a probably, truly," he assured her. It wasn't. Adrian was always happy to see her. He'd been begging her to come to dinner, after all. This was hardly that, but at least it was something.

His hand moved naturally to the small of her back as they walked toward the benches. It had been years, save the other night, since they had been together, but old habits seemed to come right back and he was willing to take any excuse to touch her, however innocent it might be.

"Are you alright?" he asked her as he took a seat beside her once they'd reached the spot she had mentioned. She looked a little pale, he thought. Was she ill? His mind was playing over all the things that could be wrong, all the ones that could explain the other morning or the way she'd acted in the journals.

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spinswildly
2009-08-06 09:34 pm UTC (link)

The touch steadied her a little, it was likely the last time he was going to do so and she allowed herself to take some confidence and strength from it. Was she alright? No, but she didn't say that nor did she deny it; she was going to be wholly honest with him despite how much it was going to tear her a part.

"Do you remember when you got accepted into Auror training?" She asked him after a brief pause, hands gripping the edge of the bench, knuckles white as she tried to drum up the courage and words to tell him. The memory of that night flashed briefly before her, it was bitter sweet and while she was disgusted with how much of a coward she had been it was one of her favourite memories of them. A brief, sad smile touched her lips before she went on. "I came to tell you then, merlin, you were so excited about getting in and I knew how much it meant to you I just...I couldn't and I chickened out and we..." made love, she wanted to say, remembering that time as having something a little extra, more feeling than the other times.

Alicia sighed softly, pushing her hand through her hair, eyes closing as she tried to drag up the courage and words.

"You have a son."

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greenauror
2009-08-08 04:43 am UTC (link)

"Of course I-" It was perfectly obvious that eh wasn't meant to answer as Ali kept on babbling about a past Adrian remembered all too clearly. He could remember every moment of that day. He had been so thrilled about his acceptance that he'd just grabbed her and kissed her. Somehow, he'd come out with the news, but anything she'd meant to tell him had been easily silenced with celebratory kisses that had led them well into the early morning. It hadn't been much longer when she'd ended things between them and he'd been focused enough on his future to agree.

Where she was going with this, he had no idea, but then when she did come out with it, he was speechless. All he could do for several awkward moments was sit and stare, his mouth opening and closing several times as he struggled to process those four little words.

"I... what?" he repeated dumbly, very much in shock at the news.

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spinswildly
2009-08-08 04:06 pm UTC (link)

This wasn't going quite as planned, not that she'd planned anything. Fingers tapped against the bench nervously as she tried to say something which actually made sense.

"I came to tell you I was pregnant, that day," she clarified, realising she hadn't actually said that in her little story. "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to ruin anything for you, I didn't want to...you were so happy and a child? Neither of us had planned on a child and I didn't want to be the reason you weren't happy." She told him quietly and for the first time she was really wondering if she'd made the right decision.

Alicia stood, feeling restless and unable just to sit there. Hands were a fluttering motion, unable to keep them just still as she paced for a moment before turning to him once more. "I did what I thought was best because I didn't want us to just be together and raise Ryan because it was the right thing to do. If we did that twenty years down the line we'd hate and resent each other and wonder what if. I didn't - don't - want that. So, I didn't tell you."

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greenauror
2009-08-12 02:59 pm UTC (link)

"You should have... you had no right to keep this from me, Ali," he retorted. He was angry and why shouldn't he be? She'd had his child and not told him. He'd miss two years of his own bloody son's life all because she had thought that she could decide what was best for his life. She'd ended them and she'd let him think, even, that there was someone else when she'd left him just recently rather than tell him he was a father.

Adrian's mind was reeling from this and he wasn't sure what he could do, what he wanted to do. He was angry, he was hurt. He was in bloody shock and he didn't even bother to hide those emotions in his expression the way he usually would. For once, everything he felt was on display.

"I want to meet him, Ali," he told her as he stood. "I can't.. I can't stay here. I have to go, but I want to meet him."

Adrian just couldn't deal with her right now. He felt betrayed and he couldn't even really bear to look at her at the moment. He was too angry and too afraid of what he might say or do. He needed to calm down. He needed to get smashed. He needed to be away from here, to be sure.

He purposefully avoided meeting her gaze. He didn't want to see the emotion there. He knew if he looked at her, he couldn't stay angry and right now he wanted to feel that. He wanted to hold onto that anger for a little while, at least, so without meeting her gaze, he turned and walked away from her.

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