|ginny weasley is cuter than a guinea pig (born_a_lion) wrote in wished,|
@ 2009-10-16 20:38:00
|Entry tags:||!1997: 10, !complete, ginny weasley, sam capper|
WHO: Ginny Weasley & Sam Capper
WHAT: nighttime ... stuff
WHERE: Gyffindor 6th year girls dorm
WHEN: Friday night/early Saturday morning
Ginny curled up on her side, staring at the inside of the curtains that had been drawn around Sam's bed. She hadn't been able to sleep very long in the past few days. When her body would force her to, out of exhaustion, she'd find herself jolting awake, heart in her throat, certain she was going into another nightmare. She didn't know how much longer she could handle this for. Every time she closed her eyes, her nightmares replayed; Sam, dead, injured, in pain, Harry gone, Ron, the twins... even Percy had played a role.
And all because of a stupid prank that had backfired. She was certain this was in retaliation for the owl she'd sent to the Greengrasses. But had it been Daphne or Astoria? Neither of them seemed smart enough to know how to brew the sort of potion that would cause what had happened to Ginny. It could've been any of them, that inane Pansy, or even Draco.
She sniffled, wiping her eyes roughly and rolling over to face her friend, not wanting to think about this anymore. The need for revenge was strong, but Ginny wasn't sure if she wanted to continue this. They were even now, or as even as they could be, but the Slytherins weren't afraid of causing pain and neither Sam nor herself would stoop to that. Sam was sprawled across her half of Ginny's bed, snoring lightly and Ginny poked her gently. The other girl didn't respond and Ginny poked her again, draping herself across her friend. "Sammy..." she whispered, pressing her lips close to Sam's ear, her fingers ghosting across Sam's stomach. "Wake up...."
"Hmm, yeah, huh," Sniffing, Sam started awake, sitting upright quickly causing Ginny to roll to the side. "Sorry, Gin," she muttered laying back down and turning her head to look at her friend. "'Nother dream?" Sam's eyes hovered between opened and closed, her speech slurred slightly by her sleepiness. "You okay?" Forcing herself to stay awake she reached over and brushed aside Ginny's hair, pushing it behind her ear.
A small smile wavered up to Ginny's face and she leaned her head to the side, pressing against Sam's hand. "I can't sleep," she said finally, ducking her head and tucking herself against Sam's side. Although Sam was several inches shorter than her, when Ginny was feeling needy or scared, she liked to be tucked against her friend. There was just something about the other girl that made her feel safe. "I'm afraid," she didn't want to admit it, but suddenly the words were coming out and she couldn't stop them. "I'll see you again or Harry or Fred or..." she broke off with a swallowed sob and pursed her lips, pressing her face against Sam's pyjama shirt and ordering herself to pull it together.
"Hey, it's okay," Sam held on to Ginny tightly, rubbing her back gently. "They're just dreams, you know?" Despite all the time she'd spent comforting Ginny over the past few days she hadn't actually gotten the girl to open up about the dreams she'd had, and she wasn't about to push her to share either. The fact that her friend was opening up all on her own wasn't lost on Sam, even in her tired state.
"Nothing's going to happen to us, any of us," she promised, an inappropriate thrill shooting through her at Ginny's admission. "Hey, cmon, nothing can happen to us at school and Fred...well no one would mess with Fred anyway," she waved a hand dismissively, brushing away the silly notion that Fred Weasley would be worth messing with.
Turning her head slightly, Ginny rested against Sam, listening to her heartbeat and trying not to cry. "You can't promise that," she said, defiantly, failing utterly to remain strong and stoic. She hated feeling like this, when her emotions got the better of her, she hated feeling so helpless and weak, hated how splotchy and haggard crying made her. "Don't leave me," she murmured, clinging to Sam, too tired to try and fight the whining tone in her voice.
It was another long moment before Ginny could manage to pull herself together enough to pull back from Sam and quirk the side of her lips up in a crooked smile. "I'm a mess," she said, without being self-depreciating. "And you deserve a medal for putting up with me."
"Whatever," Sam mumbled nuzzling Ginny's shoulder sleepily. "I've been putting up with you for years, Weasley. It's habit now." She chuckled a couple times, pulling her head back so she could look at her friend. "I don't think I could do otherwise if I tried." If it wasn't so likely that it'd put her on the path back to sleep, Sam would have winked, instead she settled for a simple smile.
Ginny poked Sam again, then rested her arms against Sam's chest and tucked her head atop them. "Seriously," she responded, attempting to pull a conceited face. "I'm well brilliant." She grinned down at her sleepy friend, struck with a wave of love for the other girl. She was aware of how insane she must sound, sobbing one moment and joking the next, but she couldn't help it. She wasn't one of those girls who could sit and cry out her issues, even when that was exactly what she needed. "What would you do without me, Capper?"
"Hmmm," Sam rolled her eyes up, feigning serious concentration. She even stuck the tip of her tongue out for the full effect. "Never get out of bed, I'd imagine. Fail out of school? Or maybe just die of boredom." She smiled and placed a hand gently on the side of Ginny's head, carefully pushing back strands of her hair and allowing herself to give the other girl's cheek a fleeting caress each time. It probably wasn't proper, she knew, soaking up all the intimacy she could from a situation she knew was nothing more than friendly on Ginny's end. But she was weak, she had long ago learned that.
Tipping her head towards Sam's hand, she allowed a lazy smile to curl her lips. Sometimes she wished that this was all the world was, just her and Sam, no war or classes or stupid oblivious idiotic boys, nothing else to interrupt them. "I love you, Capper," she said, trying to make the words sound nonchalant. It was true, and she didn't tell Sam nearly enough. She knew she'd been a prat where Audrey was concerned and she'd regretted it, but that twist of resentment was still in her stomach. She vowed to try and be a better, more accepting friend from now on, but knew she'd likely forget her promise the next day.
"I mean," she started, trying to cover her emotional confession by pulling a face and mocking herself. "You're no Harry, but you'll do."
Sam's stomach did an uncomfortable flip, she loved hearing Ginny say those words, even if she knew it was only meant in a friendly way. Ginny was, first and foremost, her best friend. Even if she harboured deeper feelings she was still her friend and she'd always love her that way. But at the same time, it was just a reminder that Sam's feelings were much more faceted than Ginny's.
Holding in a sigh, Sam started to say something inconsequential, just something to chase away the sad expression from the other girl's face. But Ginny kept talking and Sam felt her mind screech to a halt. Maybe she was projecting or wishful thinking or whatever the term that was applied to the situation was. Her hand paused, halfway across Ginny's cheek, as she replayed the statement in her head. She wasn't Harry but she'd do? Sam wasn't sure if it was a joke she was misinterpreting, an opening or a challenge. Her brain wasn't awake enough yet to process tough word problems like this! It wasn't awake enough at 3 in the afternoon!
Too hopeful for her own good, Sam let herself believe it was closer to what she'd always wanted to hear than not and shifted. Raising her head she quickly brought her lips to Ginny's and kissed her with much more passion and eagerness than she normally would have intended. Years of ignored and pent up longing rushed to take control and she tangled her fingers into Ginny's hair without thinking, cupping her head as she held the kiss.
At the touch of Sam's lips against hers, Ginny's brain all but shut down. Her body reacted, kissing back and moving closer to the other girl, her eyes fluttering closed for a long moment. The kiss was better than any she'd had before, Sam's lips were soft and sweet and she felt herself pressing against Sam before her brain restarted and she pulled back out of the other girl's grasp. "Sam," she started, then stopped, gaping at her friend, having no idea what else to say.
Although part of her longed to tuck herself back against Sam, she ended up pushing off the bed. She briefly tangled herself in the curtain before slapping it back against one of the posts and standing in the space between their beds, the stark moonlight shining through the window. She had to think about this, but she couldn't think about it. What was Sam doing? Didn't she like Audrey? And then there was Harry to think about, but he'd made his feelings abundantly clear, and why was she even thinking like this, weighing the pros and cons like she could have a relationship with Sam, she was clearly straight but the kiss had been so good and she always felt so right when she was with the other girl, but she was a girl and even though she could still feel the pressure of Sam's lips against her, her stomach tangled pleasantly like when she'd kissed Harry, she couldn't --
Ginny shook her head and took a step towards her bed, grabbing the robe slung across the footboard. She wrapped it around shoulders and forced herself not to look back at Sam's bed as she hurried out of the room.
"Gin, I-" Sam's eyes widened as Ginny pulled away from her, practically throwing herself backwards in her rush to put space between them. Her words spilled out frantically, she was desperate to amend all the damage she had just obviously done. "No, don't..." Her friend turned away from her, pausing in between their beds and Sam held her breath. She was too afraid to say something in case it pushed Ginny away and hoped she'd come back to bed.
It felt like an eternity, Ginny stood bathed in the moonlight and Sam sat upright in her bed, mouth still hanging open from shock. When the tableaux finally broke and Ginny hurried away from her Sam was certain her heart was being ripped in half. It stung, watching her run away because she'd been foolish enough to kiss her. "Shit..." What she been thinking?!
"Shit, shit, shit," Sam pulled her curtains shut, cancelling out all the many soft noises that filled the dorm at night. She rolled over and buried her face in her pillow, sure she was going to be sick any moment. How could she have been so stupid?! "Shit, shit, fucking bollocks hell!" Though her words were muffled, she let herself shout into the pillow, grateful for the charms on her curtains.