Merlin couldn't help the twist of frustration and impatience at that first answer (although yes, he did have to make amends for that bottle) and the fact that the shrug, the 'and' felt like it was going to be an actual answer and then failed to be made him bit his lip so that he didn't snap something and end up hurt after all.
Or more hurt.
A different kind of hurt (a better kind of hurt).
Unfortunately for Merlin, the answer he really wanted was not what he wanted to hear. "You wanted to." he repeated, tone flat. He ran his fingers through his hair this time before his arm came to join the other in a hug that was mostly keeping him held together. "It's a big deal to me." he said finally.