Tweak

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Tweak says, "why aren't you studying?"

Lucy Elkins is not your mother. (lucyelkins) wrote in wished,
@ 2010-02-28 00:39:00

Entry tags:

!1998: 02, !incomplete, lucy elkins, nikolas vaisey

Who: Lucy Elkins + Nikolas Vaisey
What: Post-awkward-situation-talking
When: Saturday evening, immediately following Animagus studying
Where: Hallway
Rating/Warning: PGish?

She hesitated at her spot in the classroom as the rest of the study group had filed out. Standing nearly still, Lucy looked down at her hands. If there was going to be a moment in which she could talk to Nikolas, now would be the opportune moment. She watched out of the corner of her eyes as he, too, made his way to leave the classroom. She had been doing her best to avoid him all during the week. And she knew that he had noticed and she felt a bit cowardly for it all. Chewing on her bottom lip, Lucy felt nearly rooted to the spot.

She realized, suddenly, just how terrible she wast at this. Confrontation was clearly not her forte.

"Nikolas-"

The words caught in her throat as she walked towards him.

"I, uh-" She looked up at him as she wrung her hands anxiously. "Is it alright if we talk?"

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besserwisser
2010-02-28 06:04 am UTC (link)

Nikolas was in the midst of trying to sort through the overwhelming amount of information they'd been bombarded with that night when Lucy's voice startled him to attention. Though he had realized she'd been doing a good job of not having much contact with him lately, he supposed it was probably go the best. He wasn't really sure what he'd say, anyway. So, he was a little surprised to see her approaching him.

Glancing at the other six students as they mingled and made their way out of sight, he shoved a stray book into his bag and nodded stiffly. "Oh. Yeah, definitely."

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lucyelkins
2010-02-28 06:17 am UTC (link)

She pursed her lips as a wave of relief washed over her. She switched her bag to her other shoulder as she offered him an appreciative smile. This was going much better than she had thought it would. She half-expected him to ignore her and walk right out. Then, not sure how on Earth she was meant to begin this, she scrunched her nose slightly in frustration.

"I'm not quite sure why I seem to be having such trouble with all of this," she told him, a sigh following. "This whole thing isn't really your fault."

Of course, a small voice in her mind reminded her that some part of it was.

"I'm sorry I've been- well, absent.."

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besserwisser
2010-02-28 06:23 am UTC (link)

"It's fine, really, I get it," he said quickly, rocking back on his heels before settling against the wall. Nikolas knew full well that she was probably trying to be nice - he was more at fault than he wanted to admit. But had he been in her place, he would probably have avoided her, too. Or just ignored it altogether. "I mean, it was probably better that you were."

Pressing his lips together, he hoped that hadn't sounded as though he'd wanted her to be absent. He had missed her presence over the last week. Not that they really spent all that much time together, but it was more knowing there was now a good reason for them not to.

"Not better. Just, I dunno, easier?"

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lucyelkins
2010-02-28 06:31 am UTC (link)

"Easier."

She repeated the word quietly, as she nodded her head for a moment. Had it been easier? Not particularly. It had been confusing. Although the two were far from joined at the hip, she had certainly felt his absence over the past week. Even just a smile in the corridor or their little chats after class had ended.

But the not talking had been her doing.

"I've been thinking a lot about what you said the other day," she began, still feeling nervous that now he may not still feel the same way he did. "And I think that I'd still like to do this."

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besserwisser
2010-02-28 06:44 am UTC (link)

This had not been the thing Nikolas was expecting Lucy to say. He really hadn't even thought that she might bring up what they'd discussed over the journals. At best, he was thinking this little conversation would just be the start of them talking again.

But, surprised though he was, he also felt a huge weight off his shoulders. Not only was this not something that he would be stuck questioning; the answer made him really happy. The fact that he still hadn't heard from his parents about all of this - and there was no way they couldn't know - seemed completely insignificant at the moment.

"Yeah?" Nikolas replied. He wasn't able to keep from sounding at least a bit incredulous. "I'm...that's great." He grinned a little. "Ummm...in the spirit of disclosure, since we've clearly found out doing anything else tends to have a bad outcome, I should probably mention that my parents still haven't written me, or anything. They must know by now, but I don't now why they'd not have had anything to say."

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lucyelkins
2010-02-28 09:19 pm UTC (link)

"Perhaps you've shocked them into- silence," she said after a moment.

It seemed the hardest part was now over. She managed a small smile, finding it much easier to do so once Nikolas calmed her anxiety. It seemed he did, in fact, feel the same way he had the other night. And that made Lucy feel good, in spite of everything else. She reached her hand out and touched his for a moment.

"Say, on a scale from one to ten, how angry do you reckon' they'll be about all this?"

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besserwisser
2010-03-01 03:22 am UTC (link)

Though the subject matter was quite serious, and Nikolas couldn't imagine that his parents would have any positive feelings on this matter, Lucy's reaction made him smile in spite of himself. He doubted very much that they were as incensed as the Greengrasses had been - and their anger, he had though while reading Daphne's letter, was completely misplaced. Still, the worst probably was over. At least for the time being.

At the touch of her fingers, he relaxed a bit and shrugged.

"Mmm...good question. I think it might differ between my mum and my dad. She seemed pretty ambivalent about this thing from the start, I think he was more into the idea. I almost expect them to write one of those, 'We are very disappointed in you' sorts of letters," he explained, crossing his arms across his chest and glowering in his best imitation of a "very disappointed" parent. "It's weird, because I don't think they'd take issue with you personally, just the fact that I like you and it's distracting me from what I'm supposed to be doing."

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lucyelkins
2010-03-01 03:34 am UTC (link)

It seemed terribly old-fashioned to Lucy the more she thought about it. She knew quite little of the culture of the Pureblood wizarding society, she admit that much. However, it was hard to imagine that after all this time, parents would still think to choose their child's partner. She found the idea horrifying, to say the least. But as she looked up at Nikolas, she had a feeling that relaying such thoughts to Nikolas would be redundant.

"What you're supposed to be doing," she repeated, though she made a mental note to stop that before she started to feel like a puppet. "Would that be focusing on your studies? Or focusing on Daphne Greengrass?"

Her brows furrowed for a moment as she said the name. She had developed much more sympathetic feelings for Daphne over the course of the week, but that didn't mean she liked her any more.

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besserwisser
2010-03-01 03:55 am UTC (link)

"Both, possibly, but more the second," he said after a moment. "Actually you've probably been a good thing as far as my studies go, at least in some areas."

This whole thing with Daphne was more complicated now. On one hand, Nikolas thought it was a bit of a shame that she'd found out, as they'd been a bit better than they had been in the preceding months. Not friendly, really, but there was less of that weird tension. Now, he wasn't sure if they were supposed to continue talking, or just pretend the other didn't exist for a while.

He shook his head. "Doesn't really matter, at the moment. I think the most I can do it wait til they do say something, and deal with it then. No real use in speculating and getting worried over it."

If it weren't for Lucy being a Muggleborn, Nikolas had a feeling his parents, or his mother, at least, would rather like her. She was smart, and had goals, and shared a lot of his interests. Too bad he couldn't just write them about his friend Lucy - they'd see right through that now.

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lucyelkins
2010-03-01 04:12 am UTC (link)

She couldn't help but feel a small flicker of pride shoot through her as he replied. She hadn't thought she'd ever be able to instill the same sort of care to studying that Roger had put in her to someone else. Though, something as interesting as Animagi studies was a bit easier. She tilted her head to the side.

"I guess there really isn't a reason to get yourself worried about it now," she said, wondering just how his parents would react to the idea. She felt a small pang of uneasiness as she realized she hadn't told her father about the relationship- though she didn't really have an opportunity to do so.

"What did you think of tonight's session?" she asked him, after a moment.

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besserwisser
2010-03-01 04:30 am UTC (link)

Glad for the change of subject, Nikolas gave it a thought as he began to walk down the corridor. Eventually they'd probably have to part ways, but their standing so close to where the study was taking place might seem a little suspicious if anyone passed by. He didn't like standing idly too long, anyway.

"It was good," he said, thinking back to what they'd gone over tonight. It often seemed there was too much to process at once. "Diffcult, but that's never not the case. I wish it wasn't such a long process. I know this is incredibly accelerated, but it still feels like it's taking so long just to get basics down. I don't even care who's first to get it right eventually, it'll just be good to feel like it's eventually going to work. You know? Because right now it just seemed like a lot of information that I can hardly get straight before we pile more on."

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lucyelkins
2010-03-01 04:49 am UTC (link)

"She is moving awfully fast," Lucy agreed.

For Lucy, however, the majority of what McGonagall had been teaching them was what she already knew. Although it could have possibly been a waste for Lucy to have to re-learn everything, she was still grateful to be taught by a proper instructor. In fact, the Headmistress had helped Lucy to better understand things that hadn't made sense before.

"If you'd like, though, I could maybe, help you a little bit? I'm afraid I know a lot of what she's been teaching the past couple of weeks.."

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besserwisser
2010-03-01 04:59 am UTC (link)

"I would like that," Nikolas replied.

It would probably be something he needed, if not now, then definitely later. Not that he felt he was falling behind, but it was a lot to do, and Nikolas still wasn't a huge fan of overexerting himself in his studies. The last thing he wanted to do was fail at this. He didn't really care what the other students thought - not overly much, anyway - but he didn't like failing at things he wanted. That, and he knew McGonagall had felt she was taking a gamble in taking him on to begin with. And of course there was the added bonus of spending more time with Lucy.

"That would help a lot. I've got a decent handle on everything so far, but I'm not accustomed to having to do so much at once..." he trailed off, glancing at her. "I'm sure most of this is old news to you, though? You seemed to have a lot of knowledge on the subject to begin with."

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lucyelkins
2010-03-01 05:05 am UTC (link)

"A bit of an obsession of the topic has been handy, though it's made me realize I'd be a terrible teacher. The Headmistress has helped me understand things in a much better way than I could myself."

Which was true, enough. She had felt rather proud to know that she had a pretty firm grip on the studies on her own. Having McGongall around would just push her transformation along much faster than if she continued by herself. She spared a glance around the corridor, glad to see that it was empty. Although no one really knew it was them in the library that day, she had still been forced to keep on her toes over the past week.

"It will be exciting when the transformations begin, though."

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besserwisser
2010-03-01 05:17 am UTC (link)

"This sort of worked out perfectly for you, didn't it? To be studying it to begin with, and then for her to ask you to join...sometimes things just work out. But I can see what you mean with her being a big help. Sort of gives you an idea of how to proceed."

As they passed a portrait of a pack of hunting dogs, a few of the canines began to jump and whine before chasing a fox that darted suddenly out of the bushes. Nikolas raised an eyebrow at the painting and watched the animals disappear into what he supposed was another portrait further down the hall.

"I'm most looking forward to the transformation part, though. I guess we probably all are. I wonder if it hurts at all?"

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lucyelkins
2010-03-01 05:22 am UTC (link)

"I'm quite lucky," she said, knowing it was true.

She hadn't thought in a million years she'd be able to learn with an instructor. Of course, she'd never asked but it all seemed too daunting to do so. She hadn't been keen on a professor telling her she was too young or too inexperienced to do so. But having been asked to be apart of this special group, well, it was something too good to pass up.

"I've heard it just feels a bit weird," she told him, her head turning in his direction for a moment. "But that was just from the few journals I've seen. I would hope not, really."

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besserwisser
2010-03-01 05:36 am UTC (link)

Nikolas nodded. "Probably depends on the animal you turn into. But in any case it'd be weird to have all your bones set up differently. Human brain, though, so I don't know how that would come up against any new instincts."

This had been something that Nikolas had been giving a lot of thought to. How much control would he have over himself when he eventually did change? If he did take a form similar to his patronus, and did become a bird, would he just be able to fly? Maybe he'd have to learn it. Somehow the idea of crashing into a wall wasn't very appealing.

"It's kind of hard to believe we've only got a couple of months left, now. In September I thought this year was going to drag. I guess with everything happening I've lost track of things."

There were some points when Nikolas was surprised he hadn't gone insane, between the arranged marriage, and then being made captain, and Lucy, and the decrees, and now these lessons. Last year he wouldn't have thought he'd be trying to handle all of these things at once, or that any of them would even be an issue.

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lucyelkins
2010-03-02 05:01 am UTC (link)

"This year has gone by incredibly fast, hasn't it?" Lucy mused.

The thought hadn't occurred to her until this moment. For the most part, she had felt as if nothing had changed. She still went about her day-to-day just the same as she did the previous years she'd spent at school. Of course, nothing was the same. Her family was practically in hiding, she was thought of as some sort of magic-stealing thief and she sort of had a boyfriend. It was enough to make her head spin.

But there were certain things she wouldn't trade.

"Which makes me think we're going to be cramming a lot more in these sessions than I originally thought. If only McGonagall had thought to do this back in September."

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