Everyone fancied me. Except Longbottom, but that's only because of the dungbomb incident our second day. The smell killed the romance before it began. There may have been a slight awkward stage third year. But it was brief and unremarkable and you don't remember it. I obliviated it from your mind.
Two blokes running madly after a redhead and having hair that looks like someone shaved a cat and glued its hair to our head. It just can't happen.