Peter didn't want anything. He wanted nothing. To be not. But that was the crux, wasn't it? He would endure. Always endure.
It had, in some ways, been easier in that... that lost timeline. The one where he'd been hunted, hidden, forgotten. He'd been distant towards the end, distant and cold and closed off.
Was it better? He didn't know. But he didn't hurt so much.
He was too overwhelmed to even try to hide the underlying despair from Evey.