InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I can change that."

Erik (i_haunt) wrote in we_coexist,
@ 2013-06-14 21:11:00

Entry tags:

christine daae, erik, zz:status complete

Haven (Christine)
The visit with Enigma, and everything that had transpired afterward, left Erik rawer than he'd expected to be -- and far later in returning to his wife that night. She'd been waiting up for him, he was sure, by the way she'd fallen asleep in their bed. Clearly, she'd been sitting up. The book lying face up in her lap suggested she'd been reading to try to keep herself awake.

He moved soundlessly to the side of the bed and plucked that book from her lap. As soundlessly, he laid the thing on the nightstand beside her, then moved away to change out of his suit and to shower in their expansive bathroom.

When he returned to her again, hair still damp, he found her bright eyes waiting for him. And though it was good... quite good... to see her, he could not smile.

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i_captivate
2013-06-15 12:02 pm UTC (link)

Christine sometimes found herself hating being alone without Erik but it was also something that had become common. After all, he had recently been focused on his latest composition and that had caused her to not see her husband for many days. But she could not argue with him. His music meant a lot to them both and she would not stop him from doing something that he loved. Something that he is exceptional at. A composer cannot be stopped from composing even by his wife. Especially by his wife. Yes she missed him when he left her side, even for the briefest of moments, but she loved him enough to not complain. To allow him that freedom that he needed.

She had put off going to bed for as long as possible but soon found herself longing for the comfort of their shared room. But she could not sleep yet. She had to wait for him. So she picked up a book from the library on her way to their room. After going through her nightly routine she settled into the large, soft bed and dimmed the lights down to a level that would enable her to read but would not be too heavy on her tiring eyes. But soon her plan to stay awake disappeared and her heavy eyes fell shut, her head resting back against the headboard and her fingers growing slack on the book.

She was unaware how long she had been sleeping for when her eyes opened once more. The book had gone and she could hear the distant sound of running water. He must be home. She ran her fingers through her mass of curls and sat up a little more, hoping she looked at least a little presentable. It did not take too long for him to emerge and, briefly, she was overwhelmed by how handsome he always looks. Especially with his damp hair making him seem so vulnerable. But when he did not smile she felt her heart sink.

"Something has happened." It was a statement. He could not claim that nothing has happened, she could feel it.

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i_haunt
2013-06-15 10:35 pm UTC (link)

Erik put his naked hands in the pockets of his loose-fitting cotton pants. His wife was beginning to learn his moods, beginning to know without being told what was happening with him. It was a strange truth. He was not yet used to this aspect of marriage. The sharing. He was learning, though. He was trying.

When he was at her side of the bed, he thumbed the delicate curve of her cheek. Some small spark of life returned to his eyes, though he hadn't yet found a smile for her. "Yes," he said.

The truth was that he was still struggling with what he'd done. Was it right? Should he have done something else? Should he simply have left Enigma alone? Erik didn't have these answers.

"Yes," he said again, more softly. He wanted to tell her. He remembered how secrets troubled her. "I will tell you," he promised. But not tonight. "Let it rest for a night. Perhaps... in the morning."

He needed his wife tonight. She was pure and sweet and good -- everything Enigma wasn't, everything he wasn't. Tonight, he needed Christine to bring him back from the darkness he'd visited.

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i_captivate
2013-06-15 11:19 pm UTC (link)

Christine stayed quiet at his agreement as her eyes stayed on his despite the slight flicker of her eyelids when he touched her cheek. She really did love his gentle touch. And at least he seemed a little more like himself though she could still see that something seemed to be troubling him. But before he could even say it she felt that he was going to push it aside. Hopefully not for good and when he did promise to tell her, she believed him. After their discussion on secrets she had no doubt in her mind that he would tell her.

"Very well," she answered, he voice quiet. She nodded and tried to give him a reassuring smile. "The morning."

But she would not bring it up unless he seemed adamant to ignore it. She brought her hand up to cover his on her cheek. Christine would come to accept things like this. Erik would talk when he felt ready to.

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i_haunt
2013-06-15 11:39 pm UTC (link)

Touch was still a precious thing, a gift both marvelous and wonderful. For not the first time, Erik found himself thanking whatever miracle inherent in this City that had given him a face. What would his Christine think if she knew her hand was on what used to be but scarred and ruined skin stretched over too much bone? Would she still cling to her profession of love? Or would she cast him out, as he had been cast out so many times before?

It was a question he hoped would never be answered. He would willingly give himself to darkness should she leave. This little chorus girl was the key to the lives of many. She didn't know it, and he'd never burden her with such a terrible truth; but it was there all the same. He bent closer so she didn't have to reach so far. Then he tugged down the comforter hiding her form and skimmed his palm down her side. He didn't have to look up to know what her face showed. She'd craved him against all reason, since before he took her innocence with his cursed fingers. He didn't have to understand why to know that it was true.

"Christine," he sighed, feeling the sweet and heady rush that touching her always brought. Biting back his response, he pulled away, and went to his side of the bed. When he'd taken his place beside her, when he'd folded her up against him, he set his chin on that wonderful springy mass of curls. "Tell me what you did today."

Something normal. Something innocent. Something that wasn't filled with the darkness that still clung to him now.

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i_captivate
2013-06-16 12:26 am UTC (link)

Christine could already feel that little flip inside of her as he moved the fabric covering her. She sometimes cursed her body for reacting so eagerly to his touch and his look but, as his wife, surely she should not be annoyed with it? And surely he could not be angry at her. He did not appear angry though so at least she could stop that worry. However that glorious hand soon left her and she felt the loss straight away. But she did not have to wait long as she soon slid further down the bed a little so she could rest her head over his chest perfectly.

She still loved how well they fit together.

"I spent my morning practising both my vocal and my dance," she responded straight away. She had promised him long ago that she would not neglect her voice when practising her dance and she kept that promise. "And spent the afternoon both ensuring our home is being well kept and that the garden is coming along nicely."

The updating of the garden had become a bigger project than she had planned but she had kept him up to date at all times on ideas she had. She would not do anything without his agreement. And finally it seemed to be nearing completion.

"And some of the evening I spent in the music room, practising on the piano." He had been tutoring her when he had the chance after all.

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i_haunt
2013-06-16 04:21 am UTC (link)

"Well done," he said, warmth resonating in his voice. He was pleased to know that she consistently practiced. He would have liked to have seen her through it all, especially the newer skill of piano. But for now he would content himself with the knowledge that it was being done.

"Were your lattices installed?" he asked, knowing his wife's fondness for the garden she was shaping. He hadn't managed to smile yet, but imagining Christine strolling the mansion to ensure all was as it should be -- that came close to doing it. He squeezed her little form closer. Such a young thing she was. Still so malleable. Erik curled a possessive hand around the back of her neck and held her closer. But carefully.

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i_captivate
2013-06-16 09:35 am UTC (link)

Oh how she loved to hear that from him. In Paris she longed to hear his responses to her practices and hearing it now, whilst having him there and not a phantom voice, still made her feel that way. Still made her entire body lift with happiness and contentment. He was happy. He was pleased that she had been working on something he has been teaching her. She could not be happier.

"They were. It is looking very beautiful," she replied, grinning as she thought about it. It wouldn't be finished for quite a few weeks, given how extensive the plans had become, but everything really was beginning to look perfect. Beginning to look just how she wanted it to. And to know that she could have everything she wanted, within reason, made it better. Not that she acted like a child about it given she always checked his feelings on everything first rather than just purchasing what she wants and moving on. And he seemed to accept it all. "They have said another few weeks and then we shall have our completed garden."

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i_haunt
2013-06-18 03:26 am UTC (link)

Christine's smile shone through her words. Though he could not both look at her face and also hold her close, he knew well the expression she wore. It was one he loved to see, even more so when he knew he was the cause of it. The gardens were not of his orchestration; in that, he played but a minor role. But the next thing...

"I have completed a new ballet," he said quietly over her curls. "It will play after the season opener."

He hadn't yet talked with Christine about the ballet. To her, it was fresh news. He wondered if she had any desire in dancing, now that her voice was well known.

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i_captivate
2013-06-18 07:13 am UTC (link)

Christine happily stayed in her position with her head over his chest until he said that. He had not mentioned a ballet and, often, he would mention if he is working on something. Why had he not mentioned it this time? She lifted her head ever so slightly so she could stay against him but be able to look down at him.

"You did not say," she replied, though not as an accusation. She did not sound hurt by it. No, she just felt curious as to why he had not mentioned something so incredible to her.

"What is the idea behind it?" she asked, eyes bright as she eagerly waited to hear more about the masterpiece it clearly would be.

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i_haunt
2013-06-19 01:59 am UTC (link)

"I did not say," he agreed, tenderly brushing the backs of his fingers against her face. She looked angelic in the dim light. "It happened very quickly." Two weeks was 'very quickly' and once he'd begun, he knew he wouldn't stop until it was completed. His assistant had sent Christine word not to expect him back until his composition was completed, but Erik hadn't told Mike Deal what he was working on, either. It was no surprise that Christine hadn't known.

"A mood piece," he answered. "It's called La Mer, a long variation on Debussy's suite of movements by the same name. I re-scored the harps and some of the winds for piano. The ballet mistress is working through the choreography now. It will be a full ballet. I am interested in seeing what the public will think of it."

His hand had lazily drifted to the curls hiding at the back of her neck. He fingered them lightly, his touch as graceful as he gave to any instrument. It seemed instinctual for him to touch her this way; he did it often.

"Hannibal accepted the piano piece and is working through it now. I've invited him to dinner and to play afterward. Would you care to set up our menu, my wife, and work through it with our cooks? Dinner will be Friday, if you are amenable."

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i_captivate
2013-06-19 06:59 am UTC (link)

Her eyes stayed on him expectantly as she waited to hear more about it. So that must have been what he had been doing during the two weeks she did not see him for. She had known it was a new composition but she had always assumed an opera of some kind. To hear it had been a ballet instead was rather interesting. And she still knew that it would be incredible even if it is or is not viewed as such by others. She couldn't quite imagine people not liking his work though. Everything he writes is amazing.

"I am sure they will adore it," she replied with confidence. She had no doubt in his ability to captivate an audience with any composition.

The brief mention of Hannibal had her glancing away ever so slightly. He is a good man, she knew that. And she knew he had taken good care of her husband. And yet she couldn't help that little flutter of jealousy that emerged when the man is mentioned given how hard Erik had worked in the past to give his friend a composition. But she pushed it aside and gave him a smile.

"It would be my pleasure."

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i_haunt
2013-06-20 03:10 am UTC (link)

Even in the dim light, Erik saw the flicker of change pass across his wife's expression. It disappeared as soon as it manifested, but it still troubled the composer. He sat up in bed and studied her.

"Tell me what is on your mind, Ange," he said gently. Whatever it was, it marred her happiness. It must be addressed.

The youth of his wife was still pronounced, and such youth came out in many small ways. He found it endearing. But he also knew that such things, while seemingly minute to his eyes, never were for her. He would not understand unless he asked, and he very much wished to understand.

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i_captivate
2013-06-20 06:58 am UTC (link)

As he sat up she had to pull away ever so slightly so he would be able to do so without having her right there against him. She wondered slightly what it was but his question made it clear. He had noticed the look after all. It shouldn't be such a surprise. He knew her well enough to know when something appeared to be bothering her.

"You write a lot for him," she replied simply.

But she could not continue. It would probably be obvious enough to him what she thought about that. She didn't mind him writing, not at all, but childishly she felt a little jealous that her husband wrote more for another than her.

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i_haunt
2013-06-23 03:04 am UTC (link)

"Hannibal has a singular talent," Erik said, but it did nothing to soften the emotion in her eyes. He considered his little dove in a breath of silence, then shook his head. "But I give far more of myself to you," he assured her, "Than I ever placed in any composition."

His music drove him, his music snapped at his heels, his music burned and demanded and keened inside him -- but Christine brushed through all that noise with the very sound of her voice. Did she know that he was her slave? She had to. Everything she wanted, everything she even hinted at, he gave her. He actively sought out those things she loved, and he had changed himself so that she could wear him every day and be comfortable.

There were no dark moods around her. Not just because she drove them away from him. He also hid them away, kept them far away from his diva, refused to let them touch her. Touch. He'd learned to endure physical touch -- in fact, craved hers, now. He'd learned to give it in all the ways she enjoyed. He learned that she wanted his hands on her as often as possible, even if it was to guide her through a door or down a street. She was a miracle and his mistress all at the same time.

And she'd worried about Hannibal.

His hand dipped tenderly into the dark waves he so adored, the mass of coils that had become something of an obsession. "Love," he whispered. And because words would not convey the depth of feeling in his chest, he cradled the back of her head and led her up, up until he could taste the tender bow of her mouth, the fullness of her bottom lip. How could anyone take so much of him without destroying him in the process? But she'd given him a strength and a faith he'd long ago thought he'd lost. He loved.

And she loved him in return. Despite himself.

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i_captivate
2013-06-24 10:48 pm UTC (link)

Christine knew, deep down, how silly it is of her to feel like this. Especially after he admitted to that. Though she still had her doubts given how much he put into each of his compositions but surely he put more into what they shared? Or even an equal amount. She sighed ever so softly and glanced away partly out of embarrassment for thinking such a thing but also partly because she did sometimes worry. She worried that she would never be enough for him. Never be everything he needs.

However that hand in her hair had her eyes once more on his and that one word said more than any composition could say. She knew that love had been difficult for him to accept. She could vividly remember his reaction to her first admission of love. But now he seemed far more comfortable with that and it warmed her heart. But she had no chance to respond vocally and had to resort to physically a she kissed him back. They had seemed to perfect this. Though perhaps every kiss felt right because the marriage felt right. Either way it did not matter. His kiss would always be enough to make her feel like she is melting and flying all at once.

Christine felt more than happy to continue the kiss for as long as possible. Her own hand came to rest ever so softly on his stomach as she continued the kiss with everything she had. She would not pull away until it was absolutely necessary and that did not seem like it would happen any time soon.

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	i_haunt 2013-06-25 02:21 am UTC (link)
	Eventually, he did stop kissing her. But that was hours later. (Reply to this) (Parent)