"Kindly keep that to yourself, doctor." At 'doing what with whom', Mal interrupted, his words running over the doctor's in attempt to save his ears. "What you lay or don't on Kaylee with the hatch to her bunk closed ain't none of my business. Even if it were, I ain't interested in hearing about it." Mal had only really been relieved when the doctor and the mechanic had finally got that out of their systems. It broke a tension in the ship that he could happily live without and it calmed Kaylee down in a right notable way.
One would need a stopwatch to mark just where in that list of names Mal's brow perked up the highest. A photo finish would suggest it was neck and neck somewhere between second in command and shuttle tenant.
"Why am I in the hospital? If I didn't know any better doctor, I'd think you ain't all that glad to see me." Perhaps Mal was just chiding him, perhaps he wasn't all that sure the doctor was pleased by his sudden arrival. "Waking up in a place like this has a strange way with folk, makes 'em apt to follow a lead when they hear someone who sounds an awful lot like their ship medic working at some hospital." He plucked the smallish apple from his pilfered tray, taking a bite before continuing. "'Sides, you ain't got to worry your pretty little head about the orderly who tried to 'escort me' out on account of me not being of the sick or injured type -- ain't nothing a weave won't fix and I'm sure he'll come to before his shift is over." Mal smirked. Had he gotten into a scuffle on the way in, either way, he wasn't going to give the truth away easily.