War Is Coming Communications.

TEXTS TO DAMON

~ hey, you home?

TEXTS TO KLAUS

~ Caroline's back
~ She's not in a good place
~ Upset her more and I'll be rip out your heart myself

TEXTS TO LEXI

~ I need a drink

What's with the creepy doll?

I mean, I probably don't want to know, knowing this place, but seriously.

( Damon )

Still human, huh?

( Lexi )

Let's celebrate my ex-girlfriend's face twin's birthday by seeing how fast we can drink up all the tequila in town.

... that might be the weirdest sentence ever.

Alright, listen up.

I get the feeling a lot of you guys who have just woken up as vampires are probably pretty confused. And, what's worse is, you've not just woken up newbie vamps. You've woken up as newbie vamps, with the strength of old vamps. So, you really have a lot to learn on how to control it.

So, we're here to help. Most of us have had centuries to deal with the thirst, and how to manage it without killing.

So, to start up. I'm going to need you all to fess up. If you can see this, and you weren't sure what that thirst you were feeling was. Well, now you do. Let me know here, and we'll do our best to help you out.

NO NO NO NO NO! AND DID I MENTION...NO!

This is so not okay, it's not funny. Seal, you're a dick! A giant, invisible dick. And, when I'm back to normal, Iwill find you.

[Texts to Elena - Which due to tech fail are actually sent to Stefan and Lexi instead]

>> Hey, baby.
>> Are you getting home soon?
>> I was thinking I could cook us dinner, and then run a bubble bath.
>> And then we could go to the bedroom for dessert.
>> Actually, lets skip dinner and just go straight to dessert.
>> I'm far too impatient to get you naked.

I can't believe I forgot my own birthday yesterday

Binge watching The Daily Show on my day off is actually a great way to spend the day.

Right.

I have hidden away long enough. I have a daughter here, a beautiful daughter. I have family, god help me I even have friends. I miss Caroline of course. But life goes on.

And I got to experiment with abilities across worlds.

Its not the worst place to be

[Filtered to Bonnie, Stefan, Ric and Jenna]

Elena never came home last night. And, I can't find her. She's not answering her phone.

Bonbon, I need a locator.

[Klaus]

You want a chance to try and bite that vamp?

Elena's missing. I need your help.

Sorry, brother. Had to be done.

In other news, I make an incredibly sexy pirate. Argh! Me hearties.

Anyone else wake up to find themselves with paintball guns and dressed like a pirate. Or a Ninja apparently, in my brothers case? Or is it just our house?

[Filtered to Elena]

Want to come shiver me timbers?

You two might want to make yourselves scarce tonight.

Take Jenna to Bed of Roses or something. She was friends with Lexi when she was her before, just FYI.

Has anyone seen Caroline today?

Is this another trick? I don't I find I am quite at a loss.

Any explanation I can think of for what is happening does nothing to ease my mind.

Anyone who can hold a paintbrush and use it properly want to have some free drinks and some kind of food, IDK what yet, probably pizza but then I want fries so pizza and fries. But anyway, eat and drink and help me paint a whole bunch of viking ships, dragon games and the like?

Stefan Salvatore doesn't get a say. You already signed your life away to me for helping with this party.

[Stefan]

I think it's about time that we get to know each other better.

I suppose a number of us have been attacked by random naked men giving hugs? Rather awkward.

So, Saturday, February 21 we're going to be celebrating Henrik's birthday. It's a dinosaur viking theme because that's what he wants.

Where: Our place
Time: 4-7pm

I swear you could just buy the kid wood so he can carve his own things and he'd be happy as a clam. Or books. Or of course dragon things.

I'll say it now though, if you even think of causing drama I will throw your ass out of our house. I do not care who you are. So leave the drama at home.

[Klaus]

So. Kol is in another body and is a witch. I did not see that one coming at all. I don't think he'll hurt Henrik but if he does I'm eating him.

Well, this isn't really the weirdest thing that's ever happened to me, but it's still pretty weird. Hello, Lawrence. They tell me I was here before, but I don't remember, so I'm sorry if I should know who you are and I don't. Losing your memory is a real pain in the ass.

For those of you who don't know me, I'm Stefan Salvatore.

( Lexi )

So, were you actually going to tell me about Lee anytime ever?

Written before sunrise

How could this even be possible? Am I dead?

[Klaus]

Hey.

I know Hayley came back, You doing okay?

I'm probably overstepp

[End]

I'm not sure I'll ever get used to the ebb and flow around here.

I suppose now that I'm settled in I should say something? Though the only thing I can think of is Kansas? Seriously? Is it really too much to ask for a beach?