[Filtered against baddies]
So here's a brain teaser for you. Why is it that when a bouncer knocks some drunken frat fuck's lights out, people applaud, but when I do it, everybody freaks out and I have to leave? Seriously now. Okay, so maybe I could have stopped smashing his face into the bar when it started making that cracking sound, but
On the plus side, after input from everyone else, I decided what the fuck, my soul's already hellbound. I made the bestest wish in the whole wide world. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you: THE ANYBOOZE. One endless bottle that can change its contents to any alcoholic beverage I want just by thinking about it. Stop looking for the Grail, folks. I have found it.
[Filtered to Dr. Moore: Medicine Woman] How the hell did I wind up in one of those beds in your infirmary?