InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "It's true. I am."

Henrik Mikaelson (diedtooyoung) wrote in wariscoming,
@ 2014-11-08 09:45:00

Entry tags:

henrik mikaelson, kol mikaelson

Who: Henrik and Kol
What: feelsy talks
Where: Henrik’s place
When: this weekend
Warnings: I’ll update if needed.

Spending time with Kol was usually a good thing for Henrik. He got to do some fun things like drive around in fast cars or visit amusement parks. All of them exciting and very different from the life he’d known. For all of the changes he’d seen in his family there were still parts of them that reminded him greatly of what they had been like as humans. Kol had always been the fun one, mischievous, and that definitely hadn’t changed once he’d become a vampire. Though Henrik knew the kinds of activities his brother had gotten up to had definitely been different.

He tried not to think about those kinds of things much though. Even with having been told what all had happened and why his siblings had turned out the way they were, Henrik didn’t like to think about it. Some of the stories didn’t exactly jive with what he knew of them or how they even were with him in present day.

But that had him wondering if all of the stories about their mother were exactly true as well. Those about father were easy enough to believe, he’d see how horrid Mikael was, but Esther had loved them. He was certain of that.

He didn’t mean to bring her up while the two of them sat in the backyard watching his dinosaur fly through the air, Lily trying to chase the thing.

“Do you think mother would still hate all of you if she came here?”

(Post a new comment)

itchtokill
2014-11-08 06:00 pm UTC (link)

Usually, Kol avoided the serious side of things when he spent time with Henrik. It was one of the few times he actually could seem to turn off all the thoughts about the insanity that made up this place, of the drama within the family or Purgatory--the thing that took up way too much space in his mind most of the time. All of that usually disappated when he was with his little brother though. He focused on the boy, on having fun instead.

So, when that question popped out while they were sitting in the backyard playing with the dinosaur one of the tech guys had made Henrik, Kol was a little surprised. And he wasn't really sure how to answer at first. His instinct was to blurt out his real thought--that yes, she would hate all of them, save him, because him she would try to get onside and see them as the abominations and monsters she claimed them to be. But he couldn't bring himself to be that harsh with the younger boy, so he tried to find a different way to say it.

"I think...that her hatred runs very

(Reply to this) (Thread)

itchtokill
2014-11-08 06:06 pm UTC (link)

deep and that she let it, and maybe fear as well, take over everything else. I think she believes what she was trying to do before was the right thing, and I think she was wrong. I think she allowed herself to be blinded to the fact that, monsters she sees us as or not, we are still her children, and I think that would be a very hard, if not impossible, thing for her to get past." Kol never thought much about Esther. Or Mikael, honestly. They were vile and would never want for anything other than their children to be dead, the world rid of the abominations they had created.

"But," he added after a moment's consideration, "the Seal works in mysterious ways... perhaps it would bring her from a time before everything turned sour." That would be the only saving grace for Esther. Mikael was terrible either way, and it would take an impossible amount of time for any of Henrik's older siblings to believe a gracious, loving Esther at this point. But Kol supposed it was possible, Seal willing.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

diedtooyoung
2014-11-08 06:22 pm UTC (link)

Henrik simply nodded, not liking the answer much but he knew his brother was telling him the truth, even if it was a tempered version. They were all very careful with him and he understood why. They’d lost him once and none of them wanted such a thing to happen again. Especially not because of their own words. The bit about the Seal gave him pause though. Would it do such a thing, bring Esther in from before the world had gone insane for them?

He wasn’t sure if that would really be a blessing or not. The others would still distrust her and she’d no doubt learn of what would happen. Would she begin to think the same and the cycle come about full circle all over again? As much as he missed her, he knew it was best if the Seal never tried to bring her there. No matter the version.

“Love should run deeper than hatred.” But it seemed that it did not.

“If I had not gone out after Nik.” If he had not died. “Do you think things would have been better for everyone?” Except Mikael would have still been hurtful and he wondered if their father would have eventually managed to kill Klaus. He’d seemed close to it often enough in their childhood.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

itchtokill
2014-11-08 07:57 pm UTC (link)

Kol knew he wouldn't like the answer, but he refused to outright lie to Henrik. He may curb the honesty he handed out to the youngest Mikaelson, but lying...it would do neither of them any good. False hope would be a downfall of epic proportions.

"It should," Kol nodded his agreement with his brother's statement, "but hate is easier to foster. It sits under the surface and it festers and bubbles up until it boils over and once it's unleashed...it's difficult to reign it back in, to find your way back to love." Those words could parallel in so many situations. Esther's feelings for her children, the siblings feelings for one another, the ultimate reason for Lucifer ending up on the path he did...

Kol leaned back on his arms and let his head roll back to stare up at the sky. That was something he'd considered so many times. How different might things have been if they'd never lost Henrik? He turned his head to look at the boy next to him. "I do think it would have been different," he admitted. The quiet

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

itchtokill
2014-11-08 07:59 pm UTC (link)

thought he kept to himself--he just wasn't sure if different would have necessarily been better. But really, there was no way of knowing either way.

"You're rather introspective today." he commented softly. Kol wasn't sure he liked Henrik thinking of such things. It seemed too much, too heavy for a boy his age. Yet, it was as much part of his life as it was any of theirs, and he couldn't really criticize him for wondering.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

diedtooyoung
2014-11-08 08:36 pm UTC (link)

“It is hard not to be sometimes.” He did not like being so introspective but he could not make it go away. No matter how much he tried to do so. His thoughts got away from him and he would stew on them until he finally was able to speak them aloud. It was better than keeping them in at least. That only made him angry or sullen and he didn’t want hate to be what drove him like it seemed to do for so many in his family.

“I have just missed her a lot lately and realized that as much as I do miss her that it would be best for her to never come here. So I will never see her again.” And that made him sad. He loved his siblings very much and he wouldn’t want to lose any of them, but it didn’t lessen the fact that he missed his mother, and probably always would. Henrik had never experienced the bad with her that they all had. It was difficult to see her as the villain that they painted. Even harder because he knew his death had helped lead her down that road.

“Is it wrong to miss her?”

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

itchtokill
2014-11-08 09:13 pm UTC (link)

"I know the feeling," and he did, especially here. Maybe it was just the simple fact of being somewhere that was very obviously not the home they had known that made it so easy to let one's thoughts wander that way. Or maybe it was a family trait. Who knew, really.

The certainty that Henrik spoke with, the absolute resignation that spoke volumes to how much he must have considered this already pulled at Kol's heart. He really was too young for this...

"It's not wrong," he shook his head, "it's never wrong to miss someone you love." And he meant that, opinions of the woman he may have had aside, he knew it was different for Henrik. "Want to know a secret? I miss her sometimes, too. Who she used to be." A small frown creased his forehead and he mumbled a quiet final comment he wasn't sure if Henrik would hear or not. "Who we all used to be."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

diedtooyoung
2014-11-08 10:04 pm UTC (link)

It was comforting to hear that he wasn’t the only one who felt that way about their mother, missing who she had been, the only version that Henrik actually knew about her. He almost didn’t hear the rest of what Kol said since his hearing was that of a normal humans, but he did pick it up and leaned over, wrapping his older brother in a tight hug. “I do too.”

They had all had their demons even back then but it was nothing compared to the ones that they carried now. “I love all of you now though as well.” And he knew that Kol did too, even when everything was terribly hard between them. Sometimes the love seemed to be buried a bit, but it was always there, even when they were fighting. “Even all of your differences.”

Though, he never wanted to walk down their path, to become a vampire, something he knew wouldn’t sit well with his siblings.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

itchtokill
2014-11-09 07:18 pm UTC (link)

Kol wrapped his arms around his brother and hugged him back. There was so little he could do about the feeling of missing home the youngest Mikaelson was going through and he wished he could do more. He pressed a kiss to the top of his brother's head, but didn't say anything. There was nothing to say.

"I love you too, Henrik. Very much." Probably more than the boy could understand. The fear that they could potentially lose him again perhaps made them all act overprotective, but Kol was certain that Henrik understood that, frustrating as it must have been at time for him to deal with.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

diedtooyoung
2014-11-16 02:07 am UTC (link)

"I know that you do. That all of you do." He never doubted that of his siblings, nor did he really doubt that they all loved one another. He simply didn't think that they liked one another sometimes. But maybe that was normal. He didn't always like all of them either.

"And our family is growing a lot every day." In good ways and odd ones but it was growing and he did like that a lot. Even if it didn't seem that all of them did. "I hope we stay here and can continue to grow."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

itchtokill
2014-11-17 08:25 pm UTC (link)

He nodded. He was right. They all loved him. They loved each other, in ways, but he knew it was hard to see it through all the hate, all the mistrust, everything that had built up so much over the years.

"It is," he nodded in agreement, smiling a little. In ways, he wasn't sure how to take it. He was still not sure how to take Hope. But he knew that she would never have to want for anything, just like Henrik wouldn't. And they were probably two of the most well-protected kids in all of Lawrence. If anything was going to bring the family together for anything at all--it would be protecting those kids. "I hope we stay here too, Henrik." He knew Henrik could understand the desire for that in the same way that Kol himself felt it. Because if they were to go back-- they had nothing to go back to. It was over for them.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

diedtooyoung
2014-11-20 01:45 pm UTC (link)

Henrik simply nodded. He knew that Kol understood his desire to stay in Lawrence. Perhaps it wasn't the same for the others but they all had a chance of returning home and living out their lives. Neither of them did. If they were sent back they simply ceased to exist. Or well, apparently were on the Other Side but Henrik didn't count that as living.

"We should do something fun now. I do not want more depressing talk. Would you like a cookie? We can have three. But no more than that or we will get in trouble."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	itchtokill 2014-11-24 07:07 pm UTC (link)
	Kol smiled a little and nodded, "I agree. Something fun is definitely in order." he kissed the top of the younger boy's head before he stood up. "What kind of cookies do you want?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	diedtooyoung 2014-12-04 02:08 am UTC (link)
	"Chocolate chip." It was what they had currently in the house and would do quite nicely. He felt a little better after talking to Kol and was very grateful that his brother was still in his life and vice versa. (Reply to this) (Parent)