He hadn't been expecting it. He hadn't been expecting to be told what he'd done with Loki wasn't a shocking thing, wasn't a terrible thing. He'd explained it all and he hadn't gotten near the reaction he thought. But then of course he followed it up with an even bigger bombshell.
When Rogers mentioned to him to turn around. He should have known there was more to this. And there he was, someone that yeah, would kill him at a word. Probably wanted to more than anything. Anything HYDRA. Truth be told he couldn't blame the guy after what Pierce and probably more beforehand had used him for. He couldn't help but sit up slightly as he turned back round. Again a fight he couldn't win if it came to it, this city was annoyingly full of those, and much as he now knew Rogers wouldn't let it come to that, it didn't make the situation any less tense.
"He's here. Of course he's here. He's why you needed to talk to me, why you needed to see if I was worth a shot, right? Because he wants me dead. Because he remembers me. How can you be sure he's not gonna come at me down the line."
He made it seem so simple. Prove he was something else. Prove he was worthy of it when he'd never been worthy of much of anything outside of what John had taught him to be. He'd heard Cap could sway people to believe in him and all, but Ward knew how it would go, even if he did try to be something different. He'd always take second place to Loki in certain peoples minds, and he'd never have Skye. He couldn't. People said give it time, he honestly didn't think there was time enough.
"Must be nice to have someone believe in you" he said simply. "I'm not gonna say it'll be different, that I'll suddenly wake up one day regretting my past. But you asked what I want, and I told you. And if that means a change then its worth it. She's worth it." With her, for the first time, he'd felt something more than the cold disdain for a society that had failed him. With her, he'd felt like he could be better. Even if it had been a lie.
Ward still hadn't moved from the bench. He was gonna wait till they'd gone. Drink something with more alcohol than was probably healthy. Then probably go over this conversation a million and one times, work through everything he'd said. Make a choice. Prove he wasn't the monster he was thought to be.