Who: Bonnie & Kol w/ background Caroline (y'know to keep them from killing one another) What: Talking about Expression, control, and magics. When: 9/11 Where: Clinton Lake Outlet Park...PUBLIC/NEUTRAL place! Warnings: TBD
If Bonnie were being totally honest...trusting Kol to help her through the current control problem she was having was probably the thing she least wanted to do in the world. Bonnie wasn't stupid, though. She knew that she had to do everything she could to actually help herself. That meant both talking to one of the two practically insane original vampires and it meant trusting the other witches, wizards, and various magic users in Lawrence. Between the two different sides....she was sure that something could get figured out.
Maybe part of that was because something had to get figured out or she was a risk to everyone that she cared about. And Bonnie couldn't stand the idea that she could be a danger to her friends. She didn't want to accidentally hurt anybody and that was what was going to happen if she didn't get herself under control; she had no doubt about that.
There was a definite part of Bonnie that blanched at the idea of trusting the magic users of Lawrence, let alone Kol and Klaus, but Caroline trusted them. She just had to remind herself of that. Caroline she could trust, and Caroline could help keep them in line, she hoped. That was why Caroline being a buffer made Bonnie feel a little better. She hated that she had to bother Caroline with it, but it wasn't easy for her to settle into the idea of letting Kol help her. And she was pretty sure that this was going to take some doing.
That was part of the reason that Bonnie was on edge as she sat on the park bench at the park she'd chosen. She'd yet to see anything more than passerby, which was good. They didn't need to be seen or overheard. This was kind of a private matter. And Bonnie wasn't looking forward to dealing with any disappointment. So, she just hoped that this could work out because she wasn't used to failing. She wasn't used to not being the prodigy. Nature magic had come so easily once her grams had actually gotten her started down that road. Expression had been harder, she'd had to work at it, and then she'd been dependent on Shane to help her.
There wasn't a Shane or a Silas anymore, and she couldn't afford to fall down the Expression rabbit hole without their help now; she had people that were counting on her that she had to fight this for, not just herself.
Pulling her sweater's sleeves further down onto her hands, Bonnie leaned back against the bench, leg bouncing with nervous energy. She wasn't looking forward to talking about her spiral out of control. Not only because it was Kol (and he had more than enough reason to screw her over or just not be truly helpful), but because of the fact that nobody really liked to be out of their own control, or at least she assumed nobody did. Her eyes lifted up, nervous energy flowing through her as her heart pounded. She tried to control it, knowing both Caroline and Kol would be able to hear it. And much as she didn't care if Caroline knew, she didn't want to be weak anywhere near Kol.
So, as she waited on him to jump in and get this started, Bonnie focused on her breathing and found her fingers fiddling with the edges of her sleeves. She'd spent the time since she'd initially talked about all of this trying to remember everything about her spiral into loss of control. It had started from the beginning, but had gotten worse from that point as she'd gotten angrier and more emotional. She just hoped that she had all of the details because she had a feeling he was going to need them all and this wasn't going to be pleasant.