|Parker (shinytomato) wrote in wariscoming,|
@ 2014-01-05 20:16:00
Who: Parker, open to anyone in or near the manor or can stand as a narrative.
What: She's basically on the emotional edge after the cage.
When: Today, night 2 of her rooftop stint
Where: Rooftop of Damien's Manor
Warnings: Cue major lack of self worth thanks to the cage, trust issues by the ton and haywire emotions a plenty. Also one bad word gets dropped and she's not caring about the cold.
Parker had stopped caring about the cold by the second night on the roof.
The cold just made everything real, ironic since nothing had felt real for ages by the point. Everything had been a lie on a grand scale and everything in the graveyard had been a kick in the teeth (at least to her shattered spirit). Not exactly a good thing for someone with more than a few trust issues. So she ran to the one place that was still safe: the nearest rooftop and that was oddly enough at Damien's manor (which had become home post the complex blowing up, only reminding her of everything from Endeavor and Edward's blooming love to Damien and Sidney). As the cold air swirled around her Parker made the climb after grabbing some hidden gear and a hidden spare phone, the height actually soothing the ache growing around her soul. "At least I still have rooftops, those won't stab me in the heart." she choked out while trying to keep from crying.
But by this point she had stopped caring about everything: from the fact she would easily get sick the longer she was on the roof to the lack of proof about anyone caring about her. "Why should I even care, nobody fucking cares about me after all!" she almost screamed. "Because I'm just a stupid little freak that's why!" with the memories of all the lies from the cage overwhelming her once again. She kept screaming nonsense till her throat was raw, the screams being real and grounding. But the memories kept flooding back: all the times she had to kill to escape a circle, the times her past was used to destroy her, every lie from jobs to her faked life now and the real kick to the teeth in being shown she was pure slime. Everybody hated her (at least at the moment) and she deserved to be hated.
By this point however a small bit of the rational woman within had fought its way back and a decision was made. "If someone proves this is real and not a grand scale lie I will come off the roof." she whispered, steering herself for at least a few days atop the manor's roof. But for the moment the wind, the cold and simply being high up was a small source of solace. "At least up here nothing can hurt me. Because heights can't hurt while people will just stab you till you're cold." she whispered.
But nobody knew she was also reliving some of her worst moments before the Cage: from being cold read by Dalton Rand to Hardison being buried alive. Add in the battle and everything from the Cage and a now emotionally fractured woman was left. A woman too broken to care and sure she would not trust anyone again.
"Why risk getting my heart stomped on? Nobody should bother with a stupid little freak like me." she finally decided as a single tear fell down her cheek.