"You fail. Quite terribly, at that." He shook his head. "Don't ruin a perfectly descent piece of literature with your mumbled something's."
"Yeah," was the mumbled agreement and he was completely intent on leaving it at that. But that was before his mouth decided to override his brain and the rest of what he was actually thinking came tumbling out. "Everything that ever happens to him is exponentially worse than what happens to me, or anyone realy. What he is is above what I am. He's the brother closest to me in age, I've always been in a sort of unofficial competition with him. But you can't win against someone like Nik. His bad is always worse than yours, his good a thousand times better. He's never wrong. You know, I actually think the only thing I'd ever had over him was how mentally unstable I am. How fucking mental is that? Pathetic, really." There was a pause and he shrugged, "Like I said, stupid." That was a lot for him to tell someone that wasn't Rebekah, who actually already knew all of this, so he had to brush it off, pretend it was nothing, because thinking too much would lead to realizations he didn't want to face just now. "I kind of approve of that bias, though." He wouldn't admit it out loud, but he liked having something Nik couldn't take away from him.
"Helpful. Really." he shook his head. "It's just.... I dunno. You have this....uncanny ability to actually kind of make me nervous sometimes, which is just another thing in the long list of things in this that I don't know how to handle."