He wanted to go to sleep and wake up from all of this and discover it had just been one really long, really bad dream. That they were back in Mystic Falls. That Elena's parents had never died in that car crash. That his sister was still alive. That vampires didn't exist at all, and that his brain had made all of these things up. Hell, he'd take waking up to find out he'd been in a coma from a football injury. Anything. If there was just a way to make their lives make sense and not hurt so damn much.
But Matt knew better. He knew she was right. They couldn't bring Elena back. They couldn't stop what she was now facing at home. He had to let go because there was nothing he could do and the only solution that came to mind was one he wouldn't attempt. Because it wouldn't solve anything. He wouldn't intentionally put Caroline and Vicki and Jeremy and Jenna through his death. He was sure that would come up soon enough as it was without his assistance in the matter. He had already cheated death twice. And no one could cheat death and get by with it for long.
And Elena would be furious with him if he tried to kill himself because she was gone. It wouldn't be what she wanted for him. It wasn't what Elena wanted for anyone.
So he forced himself to take a deep breath, swallowing hard as he pulled away to look at her. "You won't. Not because of anything I do, anyway," he said quietly, voice thick with emotion. He still couldn't quite manage a smile, but he did meet her eyes when he made the promise. He couldn't promise her that the seal wouldn't take him. That was something he didn't have any control over. He reached out and tucked some hair behind her ear, then leaned in and kissed her forehead, shutting his eyes.