There were very good reasons Helena had been avoiding this conversation. First and foremost it had been because Myka was pregnant and Helena was fairly certain such revelations would have sent Myka into labor. But another reason was that Helena herself wasn't certain she could handle telling all of it. As much as she may have finally grieved Christina and made peace with her daughter's death, that didn't mean she could handle talking about everything else, talking about how Christina's ghost had been there with her for two weeks. But there was so much else she hadn't even started to come to terms with, so much else that seemed as though she'd lived it in another lifetime, which she had.
Helena waited until Myka told her she could continue, and she heard the mumble and watched Myka. She knew this would all be difficult for her to process. So while the other agent was trying to digest what she'd just been told, Helena was trying to decide what she should tell next. Should she continue along in a chronological order and tell Myka of the things that had transpired here in Lawrence before? Or should she stick to talking about things that had happened in their world first, then come back to Lawrence? She settled on chronological order because she knew if she told Myka what happened in their world with the Astrolabe now she wouldn't hear anything else Helena had to say. When she was given the okay to continue, she nodded a bit.
"I'm going to tell this chronologically as I experienced it, so I will come back to what happened in our world after Sykes was stopped." And the first thing on the list to talk about Lawrence-wise? Wasn't exactly rosy. "From my death in the Warehouse, I was brought here almost a year ago. It was the seventh of February when I arrived here. Claudia was here all ready, but no one else from our world was here. The day after my arrival, I met one Irene Adler for tea. Yes, the Irene Adler from the Sherlock Holmes stories, only she was a different version. For starters, she was English, not American, and was from a modern world. She and I..." Helena's voice caught, her dark gaze growing heavy with emotion. "She and I had a relationship, though it was casual, never anything exclusive or monogamous. We were careful though, for Moriarty from her world was there as well and he had it in for her after some Seal unpleasantness. But he eventually found out about our relationship and, well, I was Irene's weakness so Moriarty focused on me."
At this point, Helena couldn't really sit still any longer, so she stood up and started pacing, her fingers fiddling with the ring on her right ring finger idly. "He played games with me, wanting to tear me apart because what hurt me hurt Irene. I knew from the beginning that his end goal was to kill me, that outcome was never in question. As you know, we are fictional in this world, but none of us knew it until Moriarty sent me a video that centered on my having lost Christina." Helena took a slow, deep breath, trying to keep herself calm. Talking about Moriarty hadn't been something she'd done since, well, since he had nearly killed her. "The you that was here at the time, you didn't let me go anywhere alone after he started the game. There were days I questioned who would shoot him first, you or me. It was also in the middle of being mentally torn apart by Moriarty that the entire situation with Pestilence, the bought of the Janus Coin effect and Emily Lake being put into a baby's body occurred." Helena had all ready explained Emily's existence before shortly after Myka's arrival, for which she was thankful.