Helena pondered her statement for several moments. It was possible Myka had smelled them, but she also knew from what Caturanga had once told her that not everyone smelled them. The Warehouse had liked her, thus she had smelled apples. Why had it liked her? That was something Helena didn't exactly understand anymore, if she ever even did. Despite coming to understand that the Warehouse was a being of its own, she still didn't exactly know why it liked her. Had it sensed, even then, that she had the nobility within her to willingly give her life to save her fellows agents, to die in the name of love? She wouldn't be surprised if it had known that even back in 1889, one hundred and twenty-two years before she'd made the sacrifice.
While she knew she should talk, that she needed to talk, Helena didn't even know where she should begin. There was so much she had to say, so much she needed to get out. And as much as she did obviously miss Myka, she knew better than to hope she would come back. Helena knew the nature of this world, the nature of the Seal. It was rarely benevolent in such ways, though she did know people could be brought back here after being sent back home. The Victorian woman also knew that if Myka did come back, she could come from a point in time before she'd made her sacrifice, even a time before Myka even knew her. But Myka could also come from after the Astrolabe had been used. While Helena didn't know many details of that, she was familiar enough with Magellan's Astrolabe to know the future was not going to be a very good place. That was one artifact that she did actually fear. In light of this, Helena had come to the painful conclusion that she needed to let go of her love for Myka. She had accepted that Myka might never return her feelings, and now with Myka gone, she should do what she could to let go of the love she held. She should not let that be a reason to keep her from pursuing other relationship prospects, if they ever came up.
"How does one even begin to let go of a love that they are willing to die for?" She looked at Svetlana. She wasn't really expecting an answer because she knew Svetlana hadn't let go of her love for Anatoly. But given Helena's current situation, she really didn't see how else she could get through this without letting go. That said, it hurt her deeply to even voice it and the pain registered within her dark eyes. The Victorian woman really was so tired of hurting and aching and longing, so she needed to find a way to put an end to it however she could. Letting go might not be the best way to go, but Helena didn't want to keep herself held back from things simply because she was in love with a woman who wasn't here. But even if she let go of her love, she knew part of her would always love Myka no matter what. Myka was the one she had died for.