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Tweak says, "Pretentious, little brat!"

Lady Marian doesn't do embroidery (mrs_locksley) wrote in wariscoming,
@ 2012-08-12 11:29:00

Entry tags:

marian locksley, robin hood

Who: Robin and Marian
What: Secrets finally coming to the surface
When: Sunday morning
Where: Robin's rooms at the complex
Warnings: A side of angst, anything else is TBD

She felt like she might be sick. Everyone had warned her that keeping her secret for long wasn't a good idea. But how was she to know that Robin would arrive with an insatiable curiosity for his past? Well...future. Time travel was so confusing. And so was the internet, but apparently, Robin had figured it out quite well. All of the stories about them, how did he even know for certain he had the right one?

But Marian couldn't take that chance. The man she loved was in danger of discovering the truth about her life after his point in time without any warning. And she knew if he read it from an impersonal source before she got the chance to tell him, he'd be furious. Or hurt. Or likely both. And she would never do anything to hurt him. She'd stepped up to save his life plenty of times. Now she had to save his heart.

She arrived at his door dressed conservatively, anxiously toying with the hem of the blouse she'd put on. She was the picture of nervousness, something she'd never been with Robin. Not when she'd been a young girl, being pushed in front of his eyes as marriage potential, and not when he'd returned, all grown up and twice as handsome. This was different. This wasn't just her heart on the line any longer...it was his. And she could very well be about to break it.

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robinofthehood
2012-08-13 01:00 am UTC (link)

Robin couldn't deny being anxious about what Marian was going to tell him. She'd said he wouldn't like all of it, and she'd never been one to over dramatise a situation. His nerves weren't calmed when he opened the door to her fidgeting and looking worried. He offered her a smile, genuine despite the situation. His heart always lightened upon seeing her. She was a soothing calm for the often stormy chaos of his mind.

"Have I mentioned modern clothing suits you?" His tone was impish, and he didn't mind if the question exasperated her. So long as she stopped fretting quite so much. The clothes he had gotten thus far were simple enough. Jeans, he'd found, were far more comfortable than what he'd worn previously. The t-shirt was still covered by a hoodie, however. Old habits die hard.

He held out a hand for her to take. "Come in, and we'll sort this out together." Whatever it was.

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mrs_locksley
2012-08-13 04:49 am UTC (link)

No, Marian was never one to over dramatise. And she wasn't this time, either. He really wouldn't like it. She was about to hurt him. And not just with the content of what she had to say, but the fact that she'd hidden it from him at all. But it had to come out. She didn't like keeping secrets from Robin and she typically didn't if she didn't have to. But Lois and the others had been right. If she didn't tell him, he would find out from somewhere else. And he'd be angry with her for not being the one to say it.

She accepted his hand, giving it a squeeze. And in a bold move for a woman of her station, but a chaste one for a 21st century girl, she leaned up on her toes and brushed a kiss against his lips. "You haven't," she teased gently, touching his cheek with her free hand for just a moment before leading him inside. "But it is nice to hear."

They'd sort it out together. Of course they would. They could get through anything as long as they were together. They could, couldn't they? But that begged the question...what was he like without her? Would he move on right away? He was young to be a widower. No heirs, obviously. It stood to reason that he'd likely remarry. The thought broke her heart, but she didn't want him to live his life alone, either.

She practically shook herself to get her mind away from there. "Did you enjoy the camp? I'll be attending next week." Unlike some women, she didn't bother asking if that was okay with him. He already knew that Marian did as she chose and asked questions later.

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robinofthehood
2012-08-13 05:24 am UTC (link)

The kiss may have seemed a bold move from others of their time, but he knew Marian was never one to follow the norm. And it was one of the things he had always loved about her. What had attracted him to her above others who had tried to gain his attention. He smiled when she squeezed his hand, his thumb brushing over her knuckles softly as they sat on the couch.

He was happy to go along with a different topic to begin with. He wouldn't rush her. "I did, it was very informative." Just as Marian didn't find it necessary to ask him, Robin didn't expect it. He was well versed in her independent nature. "That's good, you'll get a lot out of it. Though I suspect like me there will be some things you won't need to be taught." Those things which had been aimed at those with no experience in defending themselves.

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mrs_locksley
2012-08-14 06:15 am UTC (link)

His touch felt amazing, especially with the fear that he wouldn't want anything to do with her once she told him what was on her mind. She didn't release his hand as they talked, and instead ran her fingers over his. That fierce independence and tough attitude that had attracted him to her to begin with didn't extend to being with him. Oh, she could still hold her own if he gave her attitude. Which he did often enough. But those precious moments when it was just the two of them and she could enjoy being around him without worrying about being caught by Guy or the Sheriff...those were the times she let her guard down and simply allowed herself to be his.

Guy... Maybe she shouldn't do this with him missing. It felt wrong somehow. Or maybe now was the perfect time. Robin couldn't go killing a man he couldn't find. She didn't want that. Not in her name. And from the conversations she'd had with him, Guy would allow it. Maybe even welcome it. That wasn't the Robin she wanted. A man bent on vengeance and filled with anger.

Still. She exhaled, nodding at his point. "I'm looking forward to it. We can defend ourselves from plenty of things, but we've never faced anything like what's on this earth." She could take on a castle full of guards, but demons? That was a bit different. "Do I sound like some weak damsel if I admit to being a bit scared of the things here? The things this place can do? Possessions and dragging people across time...and back from the dead?"

Subtle lead-in? Definitely.

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robinofthehood
2012-08-14 01:09 pm UTC (link)

He laughed softly, bemused, though it wasn't at her expense. "Are you kidding? I'll be honest, Marian. I would be more concerned if you said you weren't scared of those things. You aren't weak for admitting that. You're honest. Anyone who says they aren't afraid is simply putting on a front. And that's what puts other people in harms way." He knew that first hand.

"But we don't need to fear any of that." His tone was as sure as it was earnest. "We have each other, and that is what matters." He felt that with a certainty above all else. Together, anything was possible.

"Going to that camp was quite...enlightening." That word alone didn't seem strong enough. "But, I have yet to meet anyone brought back from the dead." His tone, and expression, were questioning, at her words. Just what did she mean by that? Gisborne, perhaps? She'd mentioned he'd died, but given who it was Robin had given that little thought.

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mrs_locksley
2012-08-14 04:18 pm UTC (link)

Her heart nearly broke as he told her that they had each other. They did. And he'd have her, here at least, for as long as he wanted. But how long would that be when he knew the truth? And when they returned home... She'd be gone. Which was a slightly terrifying thought if she considered it too long. Where did that leave her? She'd arrived thinking this was the afterlife but it if wasn't...what was in store when she really was gone?

The thought nearly sent her into a panic and she had to take a deep breath. Her hand was still entwined in his and she looked down at their linked fingers. "That's what I wanted to discuss with you," she admitted softly. "You have, Robin. You've met someone who...was dead when they arrived here."

She didn't say another word. She merely looked up, blue eyes searching his. Her meaning was as obvious as she could make it without coming out and saying words that caused a sick feeling in her stomach every time she said them. There was nothing she could do now but grip his hand in hers and wait.

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robinofthehood
2012-08-15 10:27 am UTC (link)

His brow furrowed at her words, until the meaning of her words sunk in. "No," his voice was quiet. "Marian, you can't have..." He shook his head in denial, his questioning gaze meeting hers, silently begging for some kind of sign that this was all a cruel joke, even as he knew she would never be so unkind.

"How?" He questioned, his voice rough. How could this possibly have happened? Had she gotten in the middle of one of their fights at the castle? Had she somehow fallen ill? Or was it that Vaizey had been killed, and so Nottingham destroyed? But that didn't work. Gisborne had told him Isabella and Vaizey had been involved in his death.

He didn't let go of her hand, not at first. He was too shocked, too unable to process what she was telling him. Marian couldn't die, she just couldn't. What point had there been to any of it if she did not live?

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mrs_locksley
2012-08-15 04:49 pm UTC (link)

She felt his pain. That might have been the first time Marian could say she felt exactly what someone else was feeling. Perhaps it was how well she knew him, or maybe it was the connection between them. But as her words registered and their meaning flickered across his face, she felt the pain, the agony, and the shock that ran through him.

Briefly, as if to try and call up a memory long forgotten, though it still felt like it was just that day, she closed her eyes. When she looked back up at him, it was with tears in her eyes. "I tried to kill the Sheriff," she admitted softly. "I failed. He captured me...we went to the Holy Land so he could kill the King. With me as his prisoner." She still wasn't sure she understood why. What purpose did she serve to him?

She didn't mention the bit where she'd believed him dead. Where she'd offered herself and her good word to Guy in exchange for him killing the Sheriff. The ultimate betrayal had been enough and Robin would have more than enough to take in.

"You and the gang...you'd found out. I sent...a messenger to warn you." Best to leave Allan out of it as well. He'd find that out some other way, she was sure. The computer, possibly, or maybe Gisborne would tell him. "You were there as well. He left us all to die, tied up out in the desert. We escaped and stopped the initial plot to go after King Richard but..." If she let herself, she could still be there. The hot sun burning down on pale skin, the rush of the horses' feet, the sand kicking up into their faces. It was such an intense memory that she had to hold her breath for a moment. When she continued, her voice was even softer. "They followed us. The Sheriff and his men. The King was wounded. Gisborne..." Even saying his name hurt her. She'd known he'd be angry. But never enough for this. "He went to finish him off. I stood in his way."

It had been foolish, yes. She knew that. She always had known she was just a foolish, silly girl with some overdone sense of bravery. "I told him I couldn't love him. That I loved you." And her secret life living in both worlds was more open than ever. And it had unraveled him. "I didn't suffer for long. And you were there. That made it...better."

As if dying could ever be better. Even being held by the man she loved couldn't remedy the fact that she'd been cold and in pain and that she could actually feel life draining from her. But if it could offer him any comfort in what she was saying, she had to try.

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robinofthehood
2012-08-16 09:24 am UTC (link)

With every word she said, he felt less and less like he could breathe. As though the very breath were being stolen from his lungs. He'd experienced a similar feeling the day he'd found out it was Gisborne who'd stabbed him, in the Holy Land. But that was nothing compared to this. In fact, he was fairly sure that the feeling of that blade sinking deep in to his side was nothing compared to the feeling that came with what she was saying. Compared to the thought of losing her.

The only thing that could eclipse the feeling was the anger he felt, as he learned that it was Gisborne that had done it. He already had a deep seated hate for the man, that was no secret. He was a traitor. He had tried to kill the King, had very nearly killed Robin, himself, had succeeded in taking Marian from him once already, however briefly, and burned Knighton hall to the ground. And that was not even half of it.

And now...now he was learning he had taken Marian from him, for good. There were no words he could say to express how he felt. To describe the immense feeling of rage building within him as he sat and listened to Marian speak, hand still holding hers, jaw set in anger and an unspeakable frustration.

"How could I have..." Let that happen? Allowed himself to have any kind of truce with the other man? Any of it. Unable to put a coherent sentence together he pushed himself to his feet, moving away from the couch several steps before facing her again.

"He made a mistake in thinking he could fool me, here." In bringing Robin here, in making Robin think he was doing him some kind of service.

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mrs_locksley
2012-08-17 07:22 am UTC (link)

When he first stood, she reached for him, as if to urge him back. But he was angry and there was little compromising with the man when he was furious. There wasn't much she could say to comfort him. He had only just found out that they were forming a life together and now she'd told him that it had ended abruptly. At the hand of his worst enemy.

"Robin, don't," she said quietly, with just a hint of force. Because she didn't have it in her. No, she didn't want Robin becoming a killer in her name. But she was too tired and too miserable just then to stop him. "I know. Believe me, my love, I know. It's hard. It hurts. Knowing he's here and walking about. But you have to let it happen."

They were hard words to say. A part of her wanted to allow Robin to do what she couldn't. It wasn't who she was. She couldn't take a dagger or a sword or even a bow and intentionally kill a man. And she and Guy did have an extensive history, complicated though it was. For a time, she'd even considered him a friend. Despite all that had happened, she didn't think she could actually end his life.

Even though he'd ended hers.

She remained seated, watching her husband fume. "He's promised to keep his distance. He moved out of here to give me my space. We can let it stay that way." She didn't have it in her to plead, however. If Robin decided it had to be done...she wasn't sure she could stop him.

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robinofthehood
2012-08-18 05:34 am UTC (link)

"Why?" He implored, carefully measuring his words in an effort to not direct any of his growing fury toward her. This was not her fault. No, all blame lay with a man who he should have killed a long time ago. And now, he knew, that staying his hand had cost him more than he thought he could bear. What good was there in maintaining a truce in this world, when if they went home, he would just lose her to Gisborne anyway?

He shook his head. Because it was different, and he might have been feeling some modicum of selfishness in that thought, but whilst Gisborne may have taken her life, she was not then going to be the one who had to live with that. He didn't know what had happened after Gisborne had killed her, but he thought it something of a miracle that one, or both of them, were not dead.

"How? How can you ask me to just leave this?" How could he be expected to, was the real question. How could he be expected to control his own reaction, if and when he saw the man again.

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mrs_locksley
2012-08-21 06:10 am UTC (link)

She chose her words carefully, not wanting to anger him further. It seemed, at that moment at least, that his fury wasn't directed at her. She'd rather not risk changing that. Though if she succeeded in calming him, he'd have time to think of the secrets kept from him. How he handled that would remain to be seen.

"That isn't what this place is for," she said quietly, her eyes on him despite the ache watching him caused her. If he had to suffer through this, so should she. "This Seal brought him here for a reason. The same as it did you and me. We aren't to fight that, Robin. It isn't for us to decide."

She hesitated, only because she was trying to find conviction in her words. She'd told herself on discovering he was there that she wouldn't viciously attack Sir Guy of Gisborne. But the longer she had to think about it, to be reminded of a future she'd never know...the harder it was to remember why. All the fighting she'd done, the lying and cheating and hurting those she loved, all in England's name...she'd never know if it was worth it. If it had done any good. And suddenly she understood Robin's desperate need to know.

Worrying at her lower lip, Marian shook her head. "We aren't God, Robin. It isn't our place to decide someone's fate. This isn't a war." Well, she supposed it was. But not between them, the humans brought by this Seal. The war was against Lucifer and the demons. "If he was brought here it was with reason. It's not for you or me to decide how he is to die."

Finally standing, she crossed to where he stood and slowly but deliberately slipped her arms around his waist and buried her face against his chest. "I can't change what happened. I wish I could. But I won't have the man I love becoming a killer because of me."

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robinofthehood
2012-08-21 12:44 pm UTC (link)

"How do you know what this place is for?" He wasn't trying to be antagonistic, but he was on the defensive. He'd had a lot heaped on him in a short space of time, and he didn't quite know how to deal with it. Didn't know how to react, or what to say.

He sighed when she said they weren't god. Because Marian saw the world in a somewhat more black and white way than he was able. And that came purely from a lack of experiencing some of the things that he had, of the places humanity could go. And he was thankful for that ignorance. "Sometimes there isn't a choice, Marian. And whether you like it or not, I'm already a killer. Gisborne falling at my hand, or not, will not change that."

Despite the discussion, his arms slipped around her, hands resting at her lower back as she pressed her face in against his chest. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?" He finally asked the unspoken question that lay between them. "I mean, I can understand, to some extent, but..." He trailed off.

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mrs_locksley
2012-08-22 03:43 am UTC (link)

"I know these people," she said softly. "I know what they're fighting and what they stand for. And it isn't him." Her hold on him tightened, her eyes closing. "This isn't about him. It's about you and me." He'd never know how hard those words were for her to say. Because she knew him, possibly better than he wanted her to. She wasn't blind. She knew how the War had changed him. This wasn't the noble, gallant, and carefree boy she'd said goodbye to, thinking he'd be home shortly and they'd be married soon after. That boy would have at least considered fighting to keep his land and his titles. This Robin? The man she'd fallen so desperately for? That meant little to him. Like her, the only thing that truly mattered was Nottingham's people. "I'm not asking you to forget the things you've done in the past. But why add another? One who has already promised to stay away? It won't make any sense."

The question she'd feared so long hung in the air at first and finally she pulled back enough to look up at him. Not enough to let him go, though. One arm remained around him but the other reached up, taking his face in her hand. "You'd only just arrived. You were confused and upset. Why would I add to that?" Her eyes darkened slightly, as they often did when she considered her death. But she couldn't let him dwell on the hurt he was feeling. It would, in all likelihood, only make hers worse.

"Don't you see? I wouldn't hurt you for anything. Not if I can help it. You needed time to settle first." She hesitated, hoping her words didn't sound as empty as they felt. "It isn't exactly an easy conversation to have anyway."

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robinofthehood
2012-08-26 02:09 pm UTC (link)

"You're asking me to accept the word, the promise, of a man you've told me killed you? A man who nearly killed me, who tried to kill the King..." He trailed off, because it was pointless listing all the things Gisborne had done wrong. She was determined, it seemed, just as she had been since his return, to try and find some 'good', in Gisborne. Robin couldn't understand it then and he didn't now.

His eyes met hers when she put her hand to his face. "I'm not angry at you for not telling me, Marian. I couldn't pretend I wouldn't struggle to know how to do the same, if our roles were reversed." His anger was directed solely toward Gisborne.

And just as she had just told him she wouldn't hurt him for anything, he would do what he could to spare her from being upset, or hurt, or even inconvenienced if he could help it. And that was what would stay his hand in the end, he knew. He would do anything to keep her from being hurt.

"I'll stay my hand, because it's what you want. But that doesn't mean I trust him or any promise he has made to keep his distance. But he won't get a second chance."

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